What should Disney butcher next?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

I think I saw on Ain’t it Cool News a few weeks ago they are working on a spaceborne version of Robert Louis Stevenson’s “Treasure Island”. It’s said to be a more serious project, considering their musicals are tanking badly.

42

Remember the Goofy’s Physical Fitness shorts? They play all the time on Disney Channel.

I’d like them redone with the modern exercises. Sweating to the Oldies, AB Rollers, Thigh Master. Jazzercize.

43

When in Rome…
*Julius Ceasar
*Caligula

Or more books?
*Cujo by Stephen King
*The Scarlet Letter by Nathanial Hawthorn
*One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey
*Lord of the Flies by William Golding
*Have they done Frankenstein by Mary Shelley?
*Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe

Heh. I could just imagine the McDonald tie ins with Cujo or Caligula.

44

When in Rome…
*Julius Ceasar
*Caligula

Or more books?
*Cujo by Stephen King
*The Scarlet Letter by Nathanial Hawthorn
*One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey
*Lord of the Flies by William Golding
*Have they done Frankenstein by Mary Shelley?
**Uncle Tom’s Cabin[/i by Harriet Beecher Stowe

Heh. I could just imagine the McDonald tie ins with Cujo or Caligula.

45

Kafka’s Metamorposis. :smiley:

Just full of rip-roaring , family fun!!!

46

Lord of the Flies

I’m picturing Pumba’s head on a stick.

47

I’ll have you know that I am writing a musical based on the life of Caligula. There’s the warm and cuddly opening number, “Little Boot”, describing how the future emperor got his nickname. There’s the love song, “My Favorite Sister”. Then there’s the dramatic finale, “No Cure for Caesar”, in which Cal meets his timley demise.

48

I’d really like to see Disney try to de-violence-fy Braveheart or Gladiator. I also wonder what they would do with something like Machiavelli’s The Prince, even though it’s an essay, not fiction.
It seems like someone (not Disney) has already “taken care of” King Kong.

You know, I can see that! If I can find the time, I may just have to write a Disneyfied Joan of Arc myself.

49

How about Disney presents A Tale of Two Cities.

I don’t even want to imagine what they would do with this.

50

<sigh> I hate when people resurrect old threads…

Anywho, “TV Funhouse” on Saturday Night Live did a funny cartoon - Disney’s Titanic!. Onboard were a plethora of famous people (Einstein, Darwin, a few others), Whoopi Goldberg was the voice of the evil Iceberg, and she and the happy little Titanic make friends at the end and Titanic doesn’t sink.

Cracked me up.

Esprix

51

SURVIVOR
Filmed on location “uranus”

52

Hey, I recently wrote an (woefully inaccurate :() essay on this very topic… Well, actually on how they’d butchered other classics. If you wanna read it, email me at libraryalexandria@home.com and I’ll be glad to send it over.

53

I’m surprised I haven’t seen this title up for grabs yet:

Catch 22 - ripe for animal characters to replace the people if they want to take the road they went with for Robin Hood. Any sense of satire would be lost, but think of the cute little animals flying fighter planes!

And since Disney dipped its animated toe into history with Pocahontas, it’s about time to try it again with the Civil War and The Red Badge of Courage.

And although I’ve never read the book, I’d love to see a Disney-fied version of War and Peace.

Someone mentioned Beowulf, but why stop there?
How about the Disney versions of The Iliad, the Odyssey, and The Aenid?

And my all-time top choice for a Disney-fied version of classic – Disney’s Lolita. I’d love to see what they do with this one.

54

i want to see them screw with norse mythology- Ragnarok, specifically.

actually, i just want to see how angry Fenris the poster gets when Fenris the wolf is changed from a gigantic wolf that eats the sun to signal the coming of Ragnarok and thereby the end of all life on the planet into a small canine animal that acts as comic relief and, at the end, chokes on a lightbulb, finally coughing it up so it knocks the bad guy out in a humerous manner.

ooh, he will be pissed!

55

Somebody posted a Disneyfied Les Miserables to a board I used to post at. (This was not long after Hunchback came out, so it was a while ago.) I saved the post, so now you can all enjoy:

shudder

56

Nah, it’ll never fly - the hero is a man. We all know that Disney only uses women now as main characters. (“Aladdin” was a fluke.)

Esprix

57

And what about disney’s Naked Lunch? Those mugwumps would be soooooo cute.

58

Disney presents: the karma sutra

59

I’d suggest the Donner Party. Even though it’s been done as a musical, it hasn’t been done as a musical with cute animal sidekicks has it?

Dante’s Divine Comedy. C’mon. You know you’ve always wanted to see Dante portrayed as a gentle, adorable bear and Virgil as a studious, kind turtle.

Other ideas that come to mind: the Black Hole of Calcutta, Uncle Tom’s Cabin, the Rodney King Beating, the story of OJ, and everyone’s favorite the Rape of Nan King (sp?). A think a remake of Full Metal Jacket with the soldiers portrayed by singing chipmunks might also be in order.

60

C. Frog beat me to it.

Therefore, I’ll have to put forth: “The Adventures and Follies of a Good Natured Libertine.”

Ya’ve never heard of it? Well, It’s an old book that was sold from ‘under the counter’ way back in the '50s.

Find it. Read it. Doozy would have a blast!

regards,

f