OK, I’ve been out of work since December second. I got my last severence check December thirty-first. I’ve thirty-seven and have sixteen years experience in my field; I’m, for lack of a better term, a warehouse and dock specialist. I’ve done everything relating to warehouse/freight management. I’ve done inventory control and management, fork-lift driving (and OSHA certified training of others,) carrier contract negotiations, actual shipping and receiving tasks (filling out Bols, sending things UPS, FedEx, and DHL, as well as LTL and specialty carriers.)
So, my most recent interview, I fail due to standardized tests that have nothing to do with the job (forklift driver/order puller.) I’m in a room taking these tests with applicants for sales, customer service, delivery drivers, and forklift drivers/order pullers. What the FUCK can a standardized test tell you about applicants for all these different positions? It’ll tell you nothing about the applicants, it tells us a lot about the company though. You’re a bunch of clueless assholes who are more concerned with the “quality” of the applicant then finding people who can do the job. You’re going to end up with a fucking genius who can pass the dumb-fuck tests but doesn’t understand why a forklift has its drive wheels on the front and its steering wheels on the back. When he/she mutilates $10,000 worth of merchandice, maybe you’ll understand your fuck-up, but I doubt it; the jerk-off that make the policies won’t ever hear about it.
I’m amazed that your company has lasted as long as it has. I’d hope you get the new hires you deserve, but that would end up hurting (physically and financially) the good people you have accidentally managed to aquire.
My sympathies, D.E.S.K.Top668. I know that work is hard to find, and lots of employers have really strange criteria. I hope that something pans out for you soon.
I’m curious about that, too. Was it their own test or someone else’s?
A few years ago I had an interview where they wanted to know my SAT scores. How the fuck should I remember? I don’t know, real high, like 96 or something.
The first two had to do with english; one was word usage and the second was grammer usage. The third and fourth were number string matching and then number sequencing. As each one concluded, they “graded” and released those who didn’t pass. On test four, I was alone in the room. I’m sorry I can’t figure out more the half of two hundred questions involving “what comes next, 1, 12, 2, 12, 3, 12, 4, __, __.” (yes, I got the simple ones like that) in four minutes*. If most companies had a logical inventory numbering system, I MIGHT understand the need. Since I have yet to see such, I don’t see what relevence it has, besides making sure applicants could answer questions totally unrelated to the jobs they were seeking.
Peace and thanks - DESK
*The person grading the tests was nice enough to take the time to talk to me and answer my questions. I correctly answered ninety-seven out of the one hundred and one I answered. Unfortunately, that means I got less then 50% total correct.
Mainly, I’m happy that I’m not working for the company. But, with a wife who only has part-time work, and two children, I’d probably work for The Devil himself if the benefits were right.
My main problem, though, is that I was denied a chance to work due to a system that penalizes those who don’t fit their mold. I’d kick ass over their chosen applicants, but I’ll never get a chance to show it.
I’ll get a job, and successfully keep it, if I’m given a chance. A chance is all I ask for.
Have you tried contacting the person to whom you’d actually report? A few phone calls may lead you to this person. Let them know about the test and tell them what is in the quotes. Many times, companies have policies that force managers to use the HR staff to screen applicants for them. But I know from experience that most HR staffs have no idea on the specific requirements that are necessary for the job. I know that when I’m looking for a Corporate Finance person, the HR people will invariably send me accountants. They don’t have a clue about the differences. And speaking to managers in other departments, I’ve learned that they are also fed up with the HR staff.
A couple of years ago, a recent college grad that was initially excluded by HR decided to give me a call directly. I liked what I heard on the phone and told HR that I wanted to interview her. She impressed me, my boss and another manager enough to have us open an entry-level position for her, since she didn’t have the experience for the job that she applied for. And she was certainly more qualified than the others that HR sent to us. Being aggressive can get you places. You’ve got nothing to lose. Don’t judge the entire company by its HR people.
I wish I was exaggerating. At least then I’d just be unjustly blaming them instead of myself. But I’m not. Two Hundred questions, four minutes…Five numbers per sequence, you have to figure out what number six and seven should be. Yeah, it’s not impossible, but try doing it unprepared.
All I ask is a chance, they wouldn’t even give that to me. Give me one week and I’ll be in (and as a benefit to) your company forever. But dumb-fuck “tests” like that, I’m fucked, and so are you. I really wish I could wish upon them the employees they deserve, but the hard workers they’ve got deserve better.
It’s not fair. I do great on written tests, but they’re often completely irrelevant to the actual skills needed for the job.
At a job interview, I had to fill out a lengthy psych test. About a month later, at another interview, I was handed the very same test. I told the interviewer, “I’ll save you some time by giving you the results now. I’m smart and usually competent, but not really a team player. Not ambitious; that’s why I’m in my 40’s and don’t have a career. Kind of a daydreamer. I’ll do a good job for you, but will never climb the corporate ladder. I’m scrupulously ethical and easy to get along with, if that counts for anything. I could have made up answers to present a different profile, but as I mentioned, I’m too honest, and in any case you’d soon find out what I’m really like because a job isn’t worth the stress of pretending to have a personality I don’t have.”
Didn’t get the job; go figure. Possibly I’m too frank some times. No, I’m not. Fuck those people.
It’s a useful trick in mass testing. If no-one can finish you don’t have to time when people complete the questions to collate relative scores.
Years ago I did similar tests as part of entry to a course. There were pages of questions and no one got near finishing, however they made that plain beforehand.
About 3 years ago I applied for a job with a food service company as a shipper/loader. With years of experience hauling reefer and dry van, I’ve never used a lumper. (DESK will know what I mean.) I know how to load and unload a fucking rig.
So I went in, filled out the app and was called in for the interview. I felt I was doing pretty well. I showed I was well versed in BOL’s, weight distribution while loading, the 3,463,919 transportation laws related to trucking as dictated by NHTSA, DOT, FHWA, etc. I was a solid lock for this job. (Looking back, the problem may have been overqualification. But that doesn’t make me feel better.)
Anyway, the last step was a 115 question test you had to take. Of course, they stressed there were no right or wrong answers, it was just a personality test to see if you’d be the right person for this type of work and wouldn’t flake out in 3 months. (Did I mention I had been doing this kind of work for years???)
So I did the test that were questions that were literally along these lines:
[/]What would be the lesser evil in the workplace?
1.) An employee that drinks on the job.
2.) An employee that doesn’t follow safety rules.*
:rolleyes:
Somehow I got enough of these wrong to disqualify me. I guess I missed the write-in option where I could say:
They should both be punched in the tit. DESK, was it US Foodservice by any chance?
I took one of those once – one of the questions was “Have you ever stolen anything, ever?” Well, yeah. When I was 4, I stole a lolipop from the corner grocery store. My mom caught me, and made me take it back, then my dad whooped my ass when I got home. I’ve never stolen since, not even a fucking PENCIL! Of course, I put YES, because I’m honest. I figured that the response would trigger a few questions in the interview. Nope. Not qualified, no interview. Fuck them.
I work with a lot of logistics companies and have never seen one that would ask an experienced person like the OP to do such a retarded test. Obviously, it was Not The Right Company. Maybe it’s best you “failed” the test.
God those suck. I applied for a part-time job at the local chain drugstore when I was about 16. I had to take one of those tests…lots of questions like:
-How often do you drink? (“NONE” was not an option)
-Have you ever used drugs?
-If you found a bag of money lying by the safe would you give it back?
So I answered them honestly. No I didn’t drink, use drugs, smoke, steal, I’d give the money back, etc.
Didn’t get the job. A friend of mine said that the manager thought I was “Too honest”.
You know something? I’ve thought about this a bit since my post and decided to put the tinfoil hat on for inspiration. It’s almost like they want to see who will keep their mouth shut about whatever is going on within the company.
Too honest? That being a disqualification says a lot about a company.