What the oldest television commercial you remember?

“L.S.M.F.T.” – Lucky Strike Means Fine Tobacco

Which in grade school rapidly morphed into

“Loose Straps Mean Flopping Titties.”

:stuck_out_tongue:

In California it was the Wednesday Night Fights, sponsored by Gillette razors. Theme music:
“To look sharp, and be on the ball, to feel sharp (I forget) for the quickest slickest shave of all”
Also, anyone remember the “Six forty twelve forty conolrad” civil defense ads?
One was suposed to tune their radio to these stations for emergency (A-bomb) attacks. :eek:

Joe E. Lewis (?) in a Three Musketeers commercial. It was on during Fireball XL-5.

Or Cracker-Jacks -

*"It’s gotta be sweet,
And it’s gotta be a lot,
And you only gotta diiiiiime…

Whaddya get?
Lip-smacking, candy-whacking, killagowhacking, Cracker-Jacks!"*

I realize the last is probably wrong, but that’s what I remember.

Regards,
Shodan

Oh, and don’t forget the Timex commercials. Timex watches getting abused in various ways with the final tag line:

“Timex – takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’!”

Archergal
still wears a Timex watch

Edsel commercials. Groucho singing for Desoto.

I finally gave up on figuring it out, but somebody on the net undoubtedly has an inaccurate transcription.

Doodles Weaver did those, didn’t he? Brother of NBC boss Pat and uncle of the lovely, if not that shapely (kids were watching Spaceballs tonight and I pointed out the overwhelmingly shapely woman who was her (uncredited but obvious to any heterosexual male with eyes) body double in Ghostbusters, that being the first movie she shared with Rick Moranis) Sigourney.

Oh, FTR, her name is Leslie Bevis.

That would be John Cameron Swayze

Thanks! I totally failed to remember his name. He did those commercials for ages.

“Once upon a time there was an engineer,
Choo Choo Charlie was his name, we hear.
He had an engine and he sure had fun.
He used Good & Plenty candy to make his train run.
Charlie says “Love my Good & Plenty!” Charlie says “Really rings my bell!”
Charlie says “Love my Good & Plenty!” Don’t know any other candy that I love so well!”

Milky the Clown for Twin Pines Dairy in Detroit, MI 1950’s. Phone number TExas 4- 1100 pronounced as “four eleven hundred”.
Also the Faygo Old Fashioned Root Beer commericials with Black Bart attacking the fair damsle in the stagecoach but being saved by the Faygo Kid who claimed “Black Bart, Yooooouuu are thruuuuuu!”
Also for Faygo the little shrivled cartoon guy blowing bottles which become increasingly misshapen until the poor bottle blower claims to be “to pooped to participate” until he has a swig of faygo pop whereupon he is ready to blow again…Also early 1950’s. The line “to pooped to participate” became quite popular.

Sorry i know it should be TOO pooped…

The earliest TV ad I can recall is the original commercial for Nintendo’s Super Mario Bros. 3 video game. I can’t describe the ad any better than David Sheff did in his book Game Over:

Incidentially, this commercial also taught me how the famous plumber pronounces his own name (or how he would if he was a real person)- up to that point, I had pronounced “Mario” so that it rhymed with “stereo.”

“Bill McDavid, exit seven-Gulf! Free! Way!”

(Of course, I remember the jingle because I used to sing it every time that we drove past Bill McDavid Pontiac, just to drive my big sister crazy.)

There are three that I remember and I don’t know which one is the earliest.

First was Rub-A-Dub Dolly, the first vinyl doll that you could bathe without ruining. I can still hear the first part of that jingle: “Rub-a-dub Dolly/ soft, pretty dolly”. The linked ad is older than the ones I remember, but it’s the only one on YouTube.

Second is the Chiffon “It’s Not Nice to Fool Mother Nature” commercials.

Third is one for a (not very) local furniture store called Sam’s. It had three mariachi marionettes “playing” the jingle, which ended with “at Saaaaaaaaaaaaam’s. Phillipsburg!”

I remember the commercial (for Right Guard maybe) where someone would open his medicine cabinet and there would be someon on the other side of the wall next door, looking through the medicine cabinet. He would start every commercial with “Hi Guy!”

I also have a very early memory of a commercial for a beer (maybe Schlitz ML) where a guy in a suit would be calmly pouring a beer while a catastrophe happened around him. The commercial was accompanied by someone whistling the jingle. I remember one where the front of a house fell on him, but he was sitting so an open window saved him and the whole time he just calmly poured his beer.

It was for Alka-Seltzer, but the guy’s name in the commercial was Ralph.

“You ate it, Ralph. No, Ralph, I ate it.”

Although Peter Boyle and Doris Roberts appeared in a remake of the ad in character as Frank and Marie Barone from Everybody Loves Raymond.
One of the earliest commercials I remember was for a remote controlled robot called The Great Garloo. I was overjoyed to get one that Christmas.

I also remember commercials for a cereal called Maypo with a hyperactive kid named Marky screaming “I WANT MY MAYPO!”

I remember one from when I was a little kid in the 80’s, probably 5 or 6

I still find myself singing it for some reason.

Tasmanian carpet cleaning, a top job every time;
Tasmanian carpet cleaning, 236689!

I just looked it up, same phone number! although now its got an extra 2 digits tacked on like all aussie numbers.

HUDSON THREE TWO SEVEN HUNDRED… Darned if I even remember what it was- a furniture store or something.

John Cameron Swazee and those ridiculous Timex ads.

The Bufferin commercial showing those little "B"s getting into your bloodstream so much faster than those little "A"s.

According to Google, it was (and is) Boushelle Carpet.