(Don’t need answer fast.)
It’s oldish news by now but thieves steal 12 tons of KitKat bars in Europe chocolate heist.
Thieves have stolen more than 400,000 KitKat chocolate bars weighing around 12 tons from a truck in Europe.
Is there really a market for stolen snack bars?
Did they steal the truck without knowing what exactly was in it? If so, what now?
12 tons may be a bit much, but if they dropped 50 lbs. of KitKat bars on my doorstep, I wouldn’t complain.
Eating 1 per day per person it’ll take very roughly 1000 person-years to eat them all. So the bare minimum number of people needed is about 10 who each eat 1 Kitkat daily for 100 years. Or more realistically, for 50 years but 2 KitKats per person per day.
I wonder what the LD50 of KitKats is for an adult male of ~100kg = 220 lbs? Whatever it is, it’s less than 12 tons, so whoever has that stash now has a chance to make themselves a name doing Science!!
I’m sure there are a lot of shop owners willing to pay less than wholesale and not ask questions, but 12 tons seems like an awful lot to unload that way.
It may be that the thieves didn’t intend to steal the chocolate, they just stole a truck. The candy just happened to be that day’s cargo.
Or, there may actually be a real black market for Kit Kat
Mmmmmm…chocolate. 
Here’s a P&E thread about NewYork mayor Mamdani and his new policy for building larger grocery stores in Manhattan :
Deathwish Coffee posted something pretty much like that.
Haha! But 12 tons would be a bit much to dispose of through the trusted bodega channel. Even every bodega in Romania.
Domino’s put out a fun tweet:
Start a Kit Kat Club?
I could easily eat 5 at one sitting if I put my mind to it. So 200 person-years.
Take them to Norway, repackage them, and sell them as Kvikk Lunsj bars.
Crush them and use them as sprinkles on a 40 ton bowl of ice cream.
Are we sure they haven’t been damaged in any way, or improperly stored while they were being stolen?
Better have them at analysed individually. My house will do. It may take some time - 1000 years or so.
Look-I can either eat 12 tons of Kit-Kat bars, or I can lift weights.
I just don’t have time to do both.
Nope. I heard the story on the radio yesterday, and they reported that the abandoned truck was found a few hours after the theft, with the cargo unloaded. They really were going for 12 tons of KitKats.
That various members of the worldwide snacks industry seemed to join in a roast of this incident is the kind of wholesome thing we desperately need in our networks.
Eye-opening piece on cargo thefts in yesterday’s Guardian:
But there’s a more pressing question: what to do with 38000 bananas?