Usually, I can find some Spam lying around. Put some duct tape around the lid, good to go.
But I don’t like spam!
Well, there’s not very much spam in it.
Sshh, dear, don’t cause a fuss. I’ll have your spam. I love it. I’m having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam!
Here’s a recipe my Mom came up with when us kids were little - it was a family favorite:
SPAM ANIMAL CASSEROLE (kids LOVE names like this for suppers)
Brown in frypan: 1 can diced spam, 1/2 medium size onion, chopped, 1/4 cup chopped green peppers. Put fried mix into casserole dish with about 1/2 cup velveeta cheese or cheez whiz. Add 1 can cream of chicken soup. Mix.
Boil noodles (we usually use shells but rings work too) - drain and mix in to casserole.
Bake at 350 for 30 - 45 minutes.
Now I’m gonna go fry me some spam because you guys made me hungry. 
Before consumption, I suggest a course of poetic contemplation.
My favorite SPAM recipe, which I created:
SPAM, diced, in whatever quantity you’d like.
1 package of chicken-flavored ramen
Scrambled eggs, again in your preferred quantity
Dice up the SPAM and cook it up in your frying pan.
At the same time, cook the ramen noodles.
When the ramen noodles are done, drain the water and plop the noodles into the pan with the SPAM. Add the packet of chicken-flavor, and stir it all together.
Once the chicken flavoring is evenly distributed through the noodles and SPAM, pour in the scrambled eggs. Continue stirring until the eggs are distributed through the noodles and fully cooked.
Enjoy!
Back in the day when we were not well-moneyed (read: poor), I had to come up with cheap meals on the fly. The following is still a favorite comfort food meal for the husband and his daughters:
1 Tbs vegetable oil
1 can of Spam cut into a 1/2" dice
1 onion, chopped
Heat the oil, add the Spam and onions and stir until lightly browned.
Add to a package of prepared Velveeta Mac and Cheese.
Stir and eat.
Like I said, we had no money at the time. I also did not how to cook anything beyond boiled water. Knowing nothing about nutrition, I just wanted to make something that everyone liked. As it turns out, it was a darned tasty dish on a budget! Unless you care about sodium, then not so much.
We still eat it a couple of time each year, mostly because it’s a good reminder of how far we’ve come and also because we just like it. Fuck you, nutrition!
While this sounds inexpensive and even tasty, it has to have at least six years worth of sodium. :eek:
TREET is a horrible product that is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike Spam. Spam has the fat evenly incorporated throughout, where Treet (and all the other Spam knock-offs) seem to be like a mortadella from hell.
Spam fried and mixed with beans and rice is so good.
I once bought a can of meatballs made by the same company. They were so gross, I couldn’t eat them, so I gave them to the cat at work. He wouldn’t eat them either! :eek:
I used to slice it into 1/8 x 1/8 x 2 inch strips and throw them in a pot of ramen with a cup of mixed frozen veggies and an egg.
Spam is just fine, and all, but I will NOT have you people maligning scrapple. I’m outraged! Pistols at dawn! Taking on all comers! If that’s too extreme, a Scrapple/Spam eat-off! Time and place! 
I’m waiting for the OP to come back and tell us how he ate it. So many good suggestions! Dad’s SPAM salad sandwiches (if I may), SPAM musubi, mac’n’cheese with SPAM…
I offer here a plethora of possibilities.
Take one cup of dry rice and cook it according to the instructions on the package (or however you usually do it).
When the rice is almost done, dice a can of Spam.
Dice four or five fresh pineapple rings.
Mince a couple shallots or one medium onion.
Heat some bacon fat in a large pan. If you don’t collect bacon fat, cut up a couple slices of bacon and heat them in the pan until the fat coats the pan.
Saute the pineapple for three or four minutes. Add the shallots/onion and sauté some more. Add the Spam and sauté some more. The trick is to get a nice golden caramelization on the pineapple, a nice browning of the Spam, and translucence on the shallots/onion without burning anything!
The rice should be done by now; add it to the pan. Stir until the rice is well coated with the bacon fat and well mixed with the other ingredients. Add a generous amount of dried parsley and stir until it is evenly distributed.
Eat!
I slice it and rinse off as much salt as possible. Fry it and make a sandwich.
A similar canned product is Armour Corned Beef and Hash. Same idea. Spread thin in a skillet and heat until crispy. Great stuff. Serve with a side dish like corn or green beans.
I recall my mother making a casserole with Spam, pineapple rings and canned sweet potatoes. (Or maybe candied yams?)
She stacked the layers bookshelf fashion, but that was probably presentation preference; thin-sliced Spam, pineapple, and sliced yam alternating, all about a quarter-inch thick. I recall a sauce, which is why I think it might have been yams. I don’t recall any added seasonings, but I imagine cinnamon or nutmeg would fit well.
Haven’t had it since leaving for college, and she is unavailable for comment without the aid of a seance, so this is all the details I have.
Thinking about it, I may have to try to find or recreate the recipe. 