Not really. I’m white, though I was adopted at birth in an old-fashioned completely closed adoption, so who knows. I’m at least as “Indian-looking” as Aishwarya Rai, though I know that’s not what you mean. I have long brown hair and brown eyes and know how to wear a sari as if I know what I’m doing, so I’ve been asked by Indians if I’m Indian at least twice, though they’ve looked puzzled while asking.
I’ve been wearing saris or salwars for all dressy occasions since about 2002 by choice. For a few years back then, I did web editing (text only! their site is uuuugly; please don’t blame me) for an Indian clothing seller that paid me in clothes.
I manage weddings in Omaha not to far and we have our fair share of “rural” family weddings…I think any “day” sari would be very appropriate dress.
I’ve been to weddings exactly in a rural area near Des Moines about 3 years ago. Most of the people who attended don’t live there, but come in from the “city” for the wedding. Don’t wear black, but be ready for cooler weather and wear the sari, just not the glitzy one!
[QUOTE=Dangerosa;12981292In a Midwestern city, black is still frowned upon by many people older than 40. I’m one of those that when I see someone wear black to a wedding, my eyebrow goes up. “Didn’t your mother raise you better?” My husband is still getting crap because an old girlfriend went to a family wedding in red.
In rural America, the original Emily Post still reigns. You do not wear black to weddings, unless the bride were to indicate that would be ok.[/QUOTE]
I’m afraid I also hate to see the bridesmaids in black. The younger people might see sophistication; I see mourning. And depression. It doesn’t look very festive or celebratory.
Oh, interesting distinction. Hmmn. They’re not Pentecostal charismatic – that is, no speaking in tongues or anything like that. Not sure about “Holiness” – Wikipedia makes it sound like that’s something slightly different from the charismatics. Checking the cousin’s church’s website, I see they mention believing in: Biblical inerrancy, “water baptism,” by which I assume they mean immersion, and premillenialism.
I guess I could, but why? The problem is not that I’m opposed to wearing anything but a sari, just that I don’t currently own anything but a sari and don’t want to / can’t really spare the money to buy anything. If I’m going to buy something, there’s no reason to get something sari-like.
If I had money to burn, I might buy something like a women’s wool skirt in my husband’s family tartan and a nice linen blouse to go with it. If I have to buy something on my real-life budget, that probably means getting something used on eBay, and I’d better get started.
Guin, I am pretty sure we are talking about a sari that looks like this, not one that looks like this. It will seem mildly quirky, not outlandish, especially if the entire family of the bride has seen her dressed like that for decades.
I live in central Iowa near Des Moines and my place of work hosts weddings year-round. A sari is just fine, and I expect you will be beautiful in it. Good grief, some people act as if we never even got TV laid on here.
Yes, like the first picture! Actually, with a little less skin showing than that even. Like these (not the one with it over her head). Like I said, you can wrap a sari very modestly. Hell, they’re traditional wear for Muslim women in some places.
Well, not decades. Slightly less than one decade. Since 2002. I think I got my first sari in 2001.
I never thought of a sari as anything revealing – just that people seemed to be saying it was too noticeble or whatever. That’s all.
But then, as Dangerosa pointed out, it’s pretty different where I live. NEITHER sari would be a big deal at a wedding in my family. Black, red, etc, no big deal here.
Ok, sorry, that’s all I kept thinking of. I suppose if the print is subtle and the color isn’t flashy, it wouldn’t be a big deal at all. I have to say though, I’ve never heard anyone describe anything using the word “peacock” that ended up being subtle.
I think the green with the gold trim in your link, emma, would be perfect for that type of occasion. I don’t really think it would look strange at all in the circumstances you’re describing.
Also, sort of on a tangent, but in my experience with “rural evangelical folk” if you’re dressed oddly (to them) but are still kind and sociable and otherwise presentable at the wedding, people will think well of you.
I’ll second this. Amongst the folks I know like this, all that matters is that you do the best you can. For some, this is wearing old, ill fitting suits. For others, it’s their nicest jeans and cowboy hat. It’s the effort that counts, not the actual outfit.
Update, for anyone who advised me not to wear a sari: I’m not wearing a sari. I did a test-wearing to see how nursing the sprog might go… and it was a non-starter. I could nurse, or I could stay modestly wrapped, but not both.
So I promptly bought some stuff on eBay. I’ll be wearing either a greenish-blue stretch-velvet cowl-neck ankle-length dress from Coldwater Creek, or if it’s as hot as the weather forecasters seem to think it could be (mid-70’s in mid-October in Iowa?! :eek:), and if the following items show up in the mail in time, an ankle-length skirt in Black Watch plaid with a light beige silk wrap blouse.
I expect to hear variations on the question “So! Why aren’t you wearing a sari?” (including at least one phrased something like “So! Why aren’tcha all decked out in one a’ them fancy Indian dresses you like so much? You settle down some now you’re finally a mother?” – good bets are on my great-uncle Levi) six gazillion times.
Turns out it was a SUBURBAN midwestern US evangelical church. (My Iowa geography is lousy, and I didn’t figure the scale on the map I looked at very well. This was practically in Des Moines.)
The bridesmaids wore solid red strappy (sleeveless) dresses, bottom-of-kneecap length.
My mother wore black slacks with a navy blue T-shirt (I KNOW!! black and navy together?! Hell’s busy freezin’) and a green/navy brocade jacket. My other aunt on that side of the family, not the mother of the bride, also wore black slacks. In fact, among women of the 50 - 70 year-old-set, black slacks were the most common choice! Among the younger women, I saw everything from T-shirt dresses to a one-shoulder minidress. I didn’t see any denim on adults, but I might not have looked at everyone.
I wasn’t the most formally dressed guest in my new blue velvet cowlneck dress, but if you discounted close family members and anyone over 70, I was probably in the top 5. As I predicted, though, everyone in my vicinity looked at our 4-month-old instead of me anyway. -HE- was wearing a collared white onesie, black pants, and a Black Watch plaid vest (with white socks) and had his picture taken approx. 6,000,000,000 times.
The bride was transcendently beautiful and no one, not even my kid, took any focus away from her. She is only not-world-famous for her beauty due to her shyness and inconvenient address, as far as I can tell.
