The Washington Generals. They can buy rights to the name.
Or the Filibusters. They’d lead the league in delay-of-game penalties.
They missed a golden opportunity to build some goodwill. They could have agreed to change the name, consulted with some tribal groups, and come up with a symbol and a name that was acceptable to most people.
Then you’d get this:
Or you’d get something like the Seminoles of Florida State.
Dan Snyder is enough of a jerk, I could see him ruining a fun (but not in any objective way good) movie by doing this.
The Boston Rebels in “The Game Plan”
Yeah, that is a cool story. Their mascot represents a specific tribe, and they collaborate with the tribe in using their name. It’s officially sanctioned by the tribe. That’s the only right way to do something like that.
They could copy what Ottawa did in the CFL, and name their team the Redblacks.
Yeah, and what I’m saying is that Washington had a chance to go a similar route. They had an opportunity to approach one or more tribes and have them participate in selecting both a name and a symbol for the team. I don’t know if it would have worked, but it might have. And it sure as heck would be a better legacy than digging their heels in the ground and refusing to even think about changing it.
The Washington Jeffersons?
And the Washington Jeffersons have moved it on up to the the 49ers 5 yard line!
The Monuments
Sentinels doesn’t really do it for me. It just makes me think of someone who’s standing there on guard duty, watching over something and all the while hoping nothing actually happens. No sense of action or anything dynamic. Same as the Guardians up there in Cleveland.
I think the best team names suggest strength or speed or some attribute that would make them a proactive force to be reckoned with. Lions and Tigers and Bears. Bulls. Giants. Titans. The Sharks and the Jets. The Raptors and the Predators. The Pirates and the Buccaneers and the Raiders.
Yeah, but what can I say, Snyder gotta snyder. Heck, I could even imagine him doing it on purpose to deny “them” the satisfaction.
Always has fascinated me, how someone can arrive at a value set that considers pigheadedness a virtue.
Agree with all your examples, and I’d also add to the category of “good” names, those innately tied to their city or region: Pistons, Timbers, 49ers, Jazz (when they were in New Orleans), Hurricanes, etc.
The Washingtons Machinestons
So not the Washington Gridlock, then? 
For the Kimmy Schmidt fans, the Washington Gun-Takers.
Boomer Esiason today said it will be the Admirals. That one really makes no sense to me. George wasn’t an Admiral. The city is on a river not the ocean. There are admirals in the Pentagon but it’s filled with a bunch of other ranks and services too. Nothing about the city says Admiral.
Maybe they’re naming themselves after the butterfly.
Or the refrigerator.
But he played for the Bears…