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I’d like a law that police officers HAD to write a health department ticket for any dirty restroom (with not soap and towels and a clogged toilet) that they walked into. Then at least some cheap restaurants would be safe to eat in.
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I’d like all people who decide bus and transit issues at city hall to be required to arrive by bus or transit. They would soon find how hard they make things on people with far-separated stops and goofy time tables.
No driving while talking on cell phones.
Two vestal virgins to every male U.S. citizen returning to America after being abroad for at least 6 months.
Well… I’d settle for one vestal virgin.
Who’m I kidding. I’ll take any chick who wants to do it.
Outlaw stupid lawsuits. 
No loud music in a car, if anyone can hear you while wearing earplugs.
20 years hard labor for a high speed car chase.
No auto maker is allowed to make a car with anything less than 150HP. I’m sick of being behind a car whose max speed is 60MPH and requires the entire length of the onramp (sometimes even more) to accelerate up to speed when entering the freeway.
That’s already a law in some states, I believe. And a good one it is, too.
Maybe it’s silly, but I would make it illegal to sell a pair of pantyhose for $15 that run as soon as you take them out of the package. You can tell I’ve been burned, can’t you?
Cut off the trigger finger of anybody who shoots another person. You only get 10 shots per life, use them wisely.
My law would be: Police officers are held to the same legal standards as the rest of society… That might be a good start. Hey, without cops comitting criminal acts, we might actually get this crime thing under control in our nation…
All elections have to be the day after income taxes have to be paid.
If the doctor can’t find out what’s wrong with you, he can’t charge you.
Quit allowing the state to take a confession from a criminal defendant without requiring that he be represented by legal counsel first. I don’t really have a problem with questioning a suspect without counsel, if he waives this right, but extracting untrue * signed* confessions in return for a kind word to the prosecutor/judge or whatever is just wrong. Using statements made during questioning to further an investigation is fine, but placing a signed document in front of a jury when the defendant was misled by the police is prejudicial, at best.
I support capital punishment. I even think it should be reinstated as a sentencing option for rape and high treason. However, I think that convicting and sentencing defendants to death on the basis of a signed confession made during an intentionally confusing police interview is a great miscarriage of justice.
I know that the conditions I describe are already illegal (offering leniency for a confession and then revoking it, etc) but with the streamlining of the appeals process and harsher sentencing guidelines, we need to be even more sure that we sentence people to death only when a preponderance of physical evidence points to guilt. Too often, prosecutors and police rely on what amounts to little more than strong-arming suspects to help improve their “success” rates against crime.
I also think the jury system should be abandoned entirely for criminal trials. What makes 12 average citizens more able to judge guilt than a panel of, say, three profesional jurists versed in law? A death sentence would require a unanimous ruling.
Juries are good for civil trials (except when it comes to determining penalties and awards). Who better to judge if a person has been wronged by his neighbor than twelve other neighbors. How much the wrong should be worth is a more subjective question and should be handled by someone more responsible to society as a whole than an average citizen. Judges who make all of us suffer by being unfair would not succeed in re-election. Juries who make us all suffer through unfair punitive awards are nameless, faceless, and unaccountable for their actions.
Jayron 32,
I disagree with you. All public officials should be held to a higher standard than the rest of us. Violating the public trust is just as bad as the crime itself and should be punished as well, perhaps by doubling the normal penalty for a specific crime.
Xizor,
Good idea, but just gripping a firearm after losing two or more fingers on one hand would be pretty hard. Even with all five digits intact, pulling the trigger with the little finger is a dangerous, contortionist practice. I think I could safely get a shot off with a large .357 Magnum revolver firing a .38 Super cartridge (big gun + little bullet + low velocity = low recoil) but if I were trying to hit someone more than 10 or 15 feet away, they’d be pretty safe (and probably using the index finger to shoot back!)
WebMasterUSA
I’d bet the word psychosomatic would disappear from the medical lingo overnight. 
I’d outlaw liscence (sp?) plate covers that obscure the number. I’ve seen some so dark you can’t read the number on a bright day, let alone at night.
You abuse your kids, they get taken away from you until you have been through parenting courses up the ass, and have had psychological testing. Even then you get monthly check-ups.
You sexually abuse a minor, castration.
If a child under the age of 7 has been living with one family other than it’s biological parents for 3 years or more, that family reserves some custody of that child. Perhaps not complete custody, but at least equal. I’m all for people turning their lives around, but stability in a child’s world is too precious to have Baby Jessica/Nicolas incidents left and right.
And I’m all for registering guns. Hell, you have to register your car, and your dog, you should have to register an impliment of death, too.
I was pretty much with you up to here, except that I advocate capital punishment as appropriate for serious sexual crimes perpetrated toward children.
As far as gun control (shudder), look at the recent “success” of it in Australia. There are now virtually no legally-owned firearms in Queensland. Violent crime statistics have skyrocketed (like +30% in less than a year. Will dig for links if anyone will listen rationally to this arguement). A firearms registration law will not remove one single, solitary, lone, isolated, individual firearm from the hands of any criminal. The problem that we, the law abiding, peaceful, responsible gun owners in this country, are well aware after witnessing events in other countries that registration is only the first step in the agenda of gun abolitionists. If federal (or in my state) gun registration passes I can assure you that I, like many Canadian hunters will do this year, will lose my firearm(s) in a boating accident that will occur on a hunting trip.
A kitchen knife is an implement of death, too (a rather common one at that). You might just as well insist on a registration law for them, too.
I think concealed carry should be permitted to all persons not convicted of a felony, not under a victim protection order, without a history of mental illness, and able to demonstrate familiarity with basic gun safety principles with some minor restrictions (not in bars, schools, or government buildings). In states where this has become law, violent crime has decreased. If you were a criminal, would you attack someone in a locality that permitted the regulated carrying of concealed weapons? Probably not.
They should fine theaters that have a line so long you can’t tell what it’s for. They need a sign you can see from the end of the line, not the one at waist-level covered up by the first person to stand there.
You wait and wait for thirty minutes, reach the front and they say “where’s your ticket?” You: “I thought I was in line to buy tickets” them: “better get in that long line there, but they only have the front row left and 50 people in the line.”
Sewalk said:
>As far as gun control (shudder), look at the >recent “success” of it in Australia. There are now >virtually no legally-owned firearms in Queensland. Violent >crime statistics have skyrocketed (like +30% in less than >a year. Will dig for links if anyone will listen >rationally to this arguement).
I have to argue with this one, Australia gets enough uninformed comment from the NRA as it is…
Firearms control in Australia came into being in 1996 (it was a Federal Government initiative, backed by all states and territories). Rather than outlaw <all> guns, only certain firearms were prohibited. Provided you have a genuine purpose for your firearm (e.g. member of a shooting club, recreational shooter, farmer) you can own firearms appropriate to that purpose. What you cannot own are automatic machine guns and sub machine guns, these are “generally restricted” under the Queensland Weapons Act (http://www.police.qld.gov.au/qps/weapons_lic/qguide/contents.ssi) and similar state legislation. There are plenty of legally owned firearms in Queensland.
I would be interested to hear where the 30% rise in violent crime figure comes from. The most recent data at Statistics Queensland (http://www.statistics.qld.gov.au/spub/crime_pub/bul2_firearms/firepub2.html#Offences involving firearms) is dated 1996, when gun controls were put into place.
Australia wide, the rate of gun use in violent offences decreased since 1997(http://www.abs.gov.au/Ausstats/ABS%40.nsf/94713ad445ff1425ca25682000192af2/2044e31e55cea5a0ca2568a9001549a3!OpenDocument). There has also been a decrease in the murder rate (http://www.abs.gov.au/Ausstats/ABS%40.nsf/94713ad445ff1425ca25682000192af2/ab5039c379d8dfa8ca2568a90015499e!OpenDocument). To be fair, there has also been a rise in the incidence of armed robbery, but this is in line with increases in the number of unarmed robberies.
I’m willing to argue this, but only if the figures come from impartial and reliable sources.
Rrrg, I knew this was gonna happen, soon as someone mentioned gun control… ::sigh::…
Skim, Sewalk, there’s another thread devoted to gun control over in GD. It’s long, but it’s filled with good information, good posts, good cites, on both sides of the argument. Give it a read, you may enjoy it.
ANYway, to the OP… laws I’d like to see enacted…
I’d like to make it a law that Pepsico has to bring back Josta.
…that people have the right to beat up hypocrites.
…that all social/racial/sexual/whatever groups have to find ONE OFFICIAL DESIGNATION for their group, and stick with it! (Do we call blacks black, African American, Afro-American, People With Lots Of Pigment, what?!? I’m confused!!!)
…that all fast food advertised on TV look EXACTLY like the crap you actually buy.
…that everybody who wants to buy a computer be given a test taken directly from those “An Idiot’s Guide to…” books. If they don’t pass, they don’t get a computer.
This sounds like a scary proposition, how many dishonest doctors would be “finding” things wrong with 100% of their patients?