What would Fonzie Do or How to be Politically corect Amundo

So you come across a situation and don’t know how to behave. The first question you should ask yourself is “What would Fonzie do?” If you can find that answer you would not only get out of many a scarpe but you would also be cool.

Whenever I have no change and we need music I simply pound the nearest jukebox for tunes.

If my nerdy friends get into a scrape I always wait until the last minute to show up, pose for a few seconds threaten the problem and with a few choice words send teh threat running.

Hmmmm…lessee – ok! In a tense situation requiring a display of strength & might, say, in the middle of a particularly tense Mid-east Peace discussion that isn’t quite going your way, or you simply must demonstrate to a group of potential attackers that they really oughtn’t pursue their line of aggression, you would line up a lot of barrels and leap over them with your motorcycle.

I’ll bet Patrick Henry wishes he had thought of that instead of the boring ‘Give me liberty or give me death’ thingie…

If the barrel thing fails, you could always try water-skiing over a shark tank…

There’s the obvious: two girls both want to go out with you on the same night. WWFD? Go with both? (This happens to me all the time…)


Oh, no! You’re scheduled to give the biggest presentation of the year to the client who can make or break your company, and someone has double booked the conference room!

No worries! Just herd all the suits along, and give your brilliant powerpoint lecture in the gents.
can you tell I ought to be working as I have a deadline for a writing project…

If you start a new job, grow a beard.

Remember, a leather jacket NEVER violates dress code, as long as everything else is acceptable. (Tie, dress slacks, nice shoes and A LEATHER JACKET!).

In fact, that leather jacket will make your night so much easier to deal with, especially if you get in a tight spot. For example, if someone asks you to leave/move/do something else and touches you on the shoulder, you merely say, ‘hands off the leather’ and the situation will settle itself quickly, quietly and easily.

Oh, and only the landlord’s wife can call you by your full first name.
(heh heh, actually, this is true for me, only my mum gets to call me ‘Eugene’, or my wife, but only if she’s teasing)

The funny thing is, the whole, ‘two simultaneous dates’ thing has been entire episodes of other sitcoms, but did Happy Days ever handle that plot? Or was Fonzies constant, multi-partner dating a foil for that oft-repeated concept?

What about Brian Boitano?

I’m not sure if it was ever the focus of a story, but there were several scenes in which he had a girl on either arm. And wasn’t there a set of twins they referred to a lot? Can’t remember the name…

Oh, wait. Sorry. Forgot the theme of the thread. Let’s see now… you asked if Fonzie ever dated two girls at once. As a response I cock my head slightly to one side, spread my hands out palms up and say “Aaaaaay.”

(side note: how do you spell Fonzie’s famous utterance, anyway?")


If you ever steal a purse from a little old lady while on your motorcycle, make sure you hold the purse up in the hand that goes on the throttle. No jury in the world would convict you.

And, when in doubt, “sit on it”.

When your best friend tells you to “sit on it” make sure he knows that you are capable of putting the serious hurt on him for the disgression. This is done by making loud groaning noises followed by punching or crushing a metal object or two. (Prefereably a hand dryer or Bathroom stall door).

I don’t think the Fonz would do him.

If you actually ever have to “sit on it”, just relax and try to enjoy it.

Remember, only your best friend is allowed to call you “Bucko” and get away with it, because he’s merely driving home a serious point showing how close to acting irrationally you may be.

When organized crime attemps to put the squeeze on your favorite business, just get a couple of high-school aged chums to dress in pin-stripe suits and pretend to be an even tougher mob. The real criminals will leave in fear.

Yup, more than one girl, and often twins. It occures to me…wasn’t intimations of possibly incestuous group sex a bit much for a wholesome family show about a (supposedly) wholesome time period :smiley: ?

If I’m ever in a situation where I’m not actually in the right, I take a few minutes to assess what’s going on before sputtering out, “Okay, I was wrrrr-- I was wrrrrrr-- Wrrrrrr-rrrr-rrrr-- I was wrrr-RRONG!”
Also, I only wear my leather jacket while sitting on my hog. Any other time, I usually just wear my grey Member’s Only jacket.
And a while back, while trying to figure out if I should get a library card or not, I said to myself, “Reading is cool. Libary cards are cool.”

If I feel a rock and roll band is in need of a bongo player, I always make sure to make my way up to the stage and lay down some wild beats.

Always bring your bongos.

When in a demolition derby and your car stalls, be a Fonzie and stay in your car. Don’t be a Pinky and stand on your hood.

As long as the twins weren’t having sex with each other:wink: