What would happen if, in the process of defending myself against an attacker, I were to spread my index and middle fingers apart into a V-shape and quickly thrust them directly into the eyes of my attacker, as is frequently seen in the Three Stooges films?
Would the attacker be temporarily blinded by this? Permanently blinded??
Would it make any difference if he was able to close his eyes in time?
Thanks.
I’d imagine that the main factor would be how hard you pushed. If you pushed really hard, you could probably rupture their eyeball, and then they’d be permanently blinded. If you did it just a little hard… well, you can see for yourself. Push on your eyeballs gently and you’ll see those stars and stuff. Extrapolate from there. Your fingernail lengths would make a difference as well. If you have those huge acryllic nails pasted on, you could probably spear his eyeballs something fierce.
If you did it Stooge-style, you’d be jabbing the brow ridge just above the eyes, with a Foley artist making the sound effect. They did know how to look good without getting hurt.
There is some actual data to answer this question. Early in the Stooges’ career (before Curly replaced Shemp, who would later replace Curly), the boys were playing a game of cards when, owing to some disagreement or other, Shemp stood up and jabbed his fingers right into Larry’s eyes. It smarted, and Larry suffered some tearing and redness, but no permanent damage was done. The worst injuries were sustained by Moe, who laughed so hard he fell out of his chair and ran his arm through a window.
It’s a great distraction technique. The attacker’s focus will shift very quickly from the attack to his own eyes.
And yes, you can do incredibly serious damage to someone’s eyes. The best way is not to go for both eyes but for one. Slide your thumb up the side of their nose into the corner of the eye and gouge it out with a hooking motion. It takes less effort that one might think.
As I am fond of telling my students, after you do this, he will have one eye looking straight ahead and the other dangling on the optic nerve looking down. It will give the attacker a whole new outlook on life. I follow up the chorus of "EEEEWWWW"s with a brief explanation that if you then grab the attacker’s testicles and yank real hard, the eye will snap back into the socket. :eek:
Yes, it’s low humor but it is very effective in getting the message across.
I’m wondering what class you’re teaching. So far I’ve come up with:
Sounds like an ER training session for EMT’s in an urban gang turf war zone.
Or simple martial arts training. Most kick-boxing classes start with the notion that kicking someone in the nose can push it into his brain and kill him. This sounds more like bravado than likelihood, but it must boost attendance for those who aren’t sure if kicking is really fighting.
If the attacker is wise in the ways of the world, he will bring his hand up in front of his face and block your thrust. You should then say, “Hmm…wise guy, huh?”.
This is correct. The counter to the block is to then thump the opponent in the stomach with ones’ fist, then deliver a bonk to the back of the head once he is doubled over. This should only be done if the person blocking the eye poke says “nyuk, nyuk, nyuk” during the block.
If a third person is involved, then that person would have to object to the first person’s action. This should draw the ire of the first person, who would then turn to poke the third person in the eyes for this objection. When the first person is turned around, the second person should retaliate by smacking the first person on the back of the head. The first person will then turn around and grab the nose of the second person and either twist it or pull down hard enough to cause pain. Because the first person is turned back around, the third person would attempt to smack the first person on the back of the head, but anticipating this attack, the first person will duck, which would allow the third person to smack the second person instead. The only response of the second person would be to “wipe” his hands down his face repeatedly while saying “whoop whoop whoop!”
Remember, these are rules for hands only. There are entirely different rules for lumber and long steel pipes, and of course eating and cooking utensils.
As you seem to be at least somewhat knowledgeable in the area, a couple questions. 
(IANAdoctor)
It’s pretty hard to rupture an eyeball. The orbit is designed to break when there’s an increase in pressure – resulting in a so-called “orbital blowout fracture”. In particular, the medial orbital wall is less than half a mm thick and the orbital floor is about 1 mm thick. (Think eggshells.) The orbital floor is most easily fractured. A hard enough blow can break a large fraction of the orbital floor, resulting in an eyeball that is half sunk into the maxillary sinus cavity.
(IAStillNADoctor)
I clarify: it’s hard to rupture an eyeball with blunt trauma. An icepick won’t cause a blowout fracture, but a eye-poke probably would.
Self-defense. I’m a Taekwondo instructor.
I love that “kick the nose into the brain” stuff. The nose is cartilage, not bone. There’s nothing to be shoved up into the brain.
I think that, more than likely, the “lethality factor” of a nose shot came about from the few instances where someone got hit in the nose and was knocked unconscious, then aspirated the blood (nose shots do bleed profusely) and wound up choking to death. Just a theory, though.
In all seriousness, I have heard of evolved eyeballs being surgically repaired. How well they work afterwards, I couldn’t say.
If it does, then one should immediately shout “Field Hockey” and try to score a goal using the eyeball as a puck. Or simply stomp it and see how far the juice will squirt. :eek:
3-4) I have no idea.
5-6) http://www.bartleby.com/107/197.html
As I mentioned, I use the analogy strictly for the gross-out factor in the class, and I do it deliberately. If the student can visualize the incident in class where they are safe, then in the rare event that it might actually come to pass, they will not be as likely to lose their focus on their own self-defense and barf when they see it happen for real. They can barf later when they are safe.
I’ve seen it happen a couple of times accidentally in my martial arts classes, and have had it happen to me once.
Hurts like hell, effectively blinded by tears for several minutes in the eye that got poked.
The finger itself doesn’t cause much damage, eyes are very squishy and deformable. The fingernail is what gets you, and can seriously damage the eye.
We just had one guy in class that took a finger and got his eye and cornea scratched up really badly, required surgery and a couple of months of recovery. He may have permanent damage.