In addition to the usual stuff I’m thinking some balloon animal tricks and stock picking advice at a minimum.
I would add that she should represent me at my trial for soliciting…
I like the way the google ads just completely ignore the prostitution part and go straight for the stock tips.
Wonder if we can get it to pull up something like cookies? Ginger snaps, say.
I just don’t believe the 2K rate. Sorry, she’s full of herself, apparently not too bright. Maybe Trump can have her on Apprentice 4: Pimps and Hos. She’s got the self-promotion part down.
In this part of the world, Li Ka-shing is much more famous than the fellow with the hair. Even had a whole medical faculty named after him: the Li Ka-shing Medical Faculty, no less.
Q: What would you expect from a prostitute that charges $ 2000 per hour?
A: One hell of a lot of change.
I would expect her to shit gold.
From the second link: “FAVORITE SAYING: can’t tell, my mom’s going to read this.” Uh huh. So the all-caps page title proclaiming you to be a major city’s top hooker is just fine, but your mom will take offense to some dumb saying?
Also, there’s such a thing as “hooker etiquette”?
For 2000 simoleons, she better wipe my ass with babywipes afterwards.
Here is New York Metro’s fascinating expose all about this ho and her self-proclaimed King of All Pimps.
I would expect a $2,000 hooker to be more attractive. Her face in the picture with the pink top looks like a guy in drag. I am not partial to masculine looking women.
Her body looks like it might be nice though…
And all this time I’d thought guys were turned off by girls who like Hello Kitty.
As I remember, in “Pretty Woman,” hooker Julia Roberts was hired for a full week for three thousand dollars, total.
I better have to pull the bedsheets out of my ass afterwards for 2K an hour.
For $2000 she’d also better fix my truck, rewire my stereo system, do my housekeeping for a week and fix a damn good cheeseburger.
We are joined by her sister and her mother.
My needs are few.
I’d better have a multiple male sexual orgasm with the longest, farthest (or highest, depending) and most intense ejaculate in my life accompanied immediately by opiate-level perception of time-passage, quivering bodily sensations, a weeklong sense of well-being and just about the best sleep ever.
Discretion.
A gushing confession extolling my unchecked sexual prowress, stamina and deceptive limberness of body and tongue given to my ex-.
She better do widows…oops, windows.
Slight hijack, but on a recent trip to D.C. I was stunned at the number of pages of Escorts ads in the phone book. (I really wasn’t looking for anything- I just came across… I mean… saw them- [female escorts aren’t my bag, not that there’s anythign wrong with that]).
See… here’s what I want. First, we both get naked. Except, we’re both wearing sailor’s hats. Then we get into a Jacuzzi filled with Pepto-bismol, I clip her toenails, she shaves my buttocks.
So… naked… jacuzzi… Pepto-Bismol… toenails… shave my buttocks.
Two million dollars for the references. Disclaimer: Money may be locked in a train station locker in Silver City.
For $2000, she could go out and get me 3 $500 hookers that were a little better looking and keep $500 for her troubles.