What would your Witness Protection name be? and why?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Assume, for some reason, that you have to go into the Witness Protection program. Say you saw the head honcho of the World’s Largest Platypus Importing Ring unload his latest puddle of platypuses and they are out to get you. :slight_smile: Or for another reason. It really doesn’t matter.

Let’s also say that the WitSec people let you choose your new name, as long as it doesn’t relate to your old name in any way.

What name would you choose, and why?

And, for extra credit, describe how a determined Purloined Platypus Procurer might guess some rejected names based on knowing something about you.

J.

2

Tragedy Webster – wait, that’s my pr0n name. How 'bout Oreo Temple? (an alternative selection using the same categories) I sort of like the idea of a place of worshipping a cookie.

3

John Smith. You get lost in the crowd.

4

Max Power. I got it from my hair dryer. (Homer Simpson)

5

Gern Blanston. And why not?

6

Something easy to spell. Oh the heaven of going somewhere and not spending 5 mins spelling and respelling my name. dreams

7

Pierre Lingerie, so that I could adopt that unearned French air of superiority.

8

Probably some name really common for women my age, and an equally mundane last name. So maybe Jennifer or Melissa, Brown or Anderson.

9

Debra Johnson

I had a friend named that. When she checked her credit report it was a combination of her and 4 other Debra Johnsons.
All of them married to a James Johnson.
All of them in the same city.

It was a nightmare to straighten the mess out but you can’t get more anonymous.

10

Jack Flagstaff.

11

My porn name is Rocky Montego, and I’ve always felt that it was a kind of badass name.

12

Good point! Rex Chan it is.

13

…you think I’m going to tell you that?

14

Nothoo Uthin Kyam.

Obviously.

15

Obviously William Shatner, no one will ever figure it out

Capt

16

Thomas Kennison

(middle name, bio last name)

17

Waldo Sigridsdotter. Confuse them with mixed genders.

18

Guy Incognito?

19

My name is Inigo Montoya. Prepare to die.

20

I’d choose the name of one of my great-grandmothers on the maternal side. Easy to remember, fairly common name, and the surname would be different, since I of course carry my father’s surname.