What? You "moist your eyes"? Share your weird "mis-heard" things (not songs)

I was playing poker with friends some years ago, and frankly, I was pretty stoned, which could account for this, but my friend said something that seemed so incredibly weird to me. I thought she said “Do you moist your eyes?” Now, moistening one’s eyes is not so odd, of course, that’s what Visine is for. But who says “Do you moist your eyes?”

Well, turns out no one does. They say “Do you moisturize?”

Duh.

Gimme another bong hit…

Just had one today. My roommate was cooking dinner while the laundry and kitchen faucet were both running, and I swear up and down I heard her say “Grabbable.” I had to stand there and work through it for several seconds before I realized she said “Grab a bowl.”