Recently, a friend (I think) accused me, teasingly (I think), of being easy. I think she actually meant easy to manipulate, but the fact is, unless you count setting off my temper, I’m one of the most difficult people to manipulate, without my consent, that you will ever meet. I can’t be “spun”, and I don’t capitulate to emotional blackmail. And, whipped is a term that may apply to cream, but not to me. But, that’s not to say I’m not willing to accomodate my friends or lovers. So, the comment has been bouncing around in the cluttered back rooms of my mind, trying to find a place to call home, long enough to have taken on some life of its own, and mutated. And, that’s pretty much where the point of this thread comes in.
Because being “easy” has other connotations; primarily, it means “easy to get in bed”. Well, I am a guy. Try to find one who isn’t easy to get in bed, if you’re the right gender and not overly gruesome. But, there’s also the implication that the person in question does not “play hard to get”. And, on this one, I readily plead guilty.
Personally, I just don’t see the point. I know, some people say that you won’t be properly appreciated, if you don’t. I don’t buy that. Even in a casual dating or pickup scene, how much more appreciated do you need to feel? The guy/girl wants to boff you. Sounds pretty appreciative to me, unless you’re under the impression you were their last choice? (Okay, so you could have been, if it’s closing time at the bar.) Maybe it enhances the “thrill of the chase”, for the pursuer, but I’ve always been one to “fish where the fishing is good”. If I don’t get a nibble, I’ll move on to the next promising looking spot. So, if I’ve already decided someone is a likely prospect, and they show interest, I’m not about to blow it by playing some silly game. I want you? You want me? Works for me; let’s go.
The other thing is, I trust my instincts. So far, they’ve only let me down once. They’ve even led me to at least one woman (and, possibly two) who could be considered a soulmate for me. (Unfortunately, circumstances prevented a real relationship, in both cases.) And aside from my first wife, I’ve never dated a woman that was wrong for me. I’m not talking about pickups, here. There have been cases where I’ve picked up, or been picked up by ;), a woman I knew I had no future with. But, I knew that, going in, and that isn’t always a bad thing.
In fact, I’ve never been on a truly horrendous date (knock on wood). I guess you could say I’ve been lucky, but I think it has more to do with being a good judge of people. And, it seems to work, for me. So, aside from the chance that I may be “spoken for” when the next soulmate comes along, why should I play hard to get?
What do you folks think?