I could kill you, but then I’d have to tell you.
I know a woman who was cheating on her fiancee a week before their wedding, then cheating on her husband a week after.
Here’s another secret. Some stranger came to me with a box that has a big red button on it. The stranger said that if I push the button, I will become instantly rich and someone I don’t know will die.
As a teenager, I knew my father was having an affair before most anyone else. I didn’t keep that secret for very long though.
I have also know about a ton of layoffs and firings before they happened. One of them included me.
I also hold a security clearance. Some stuff is fascinating; other stuff, you wonder why anyone bothered.
On a personal level, I do get a lot of folks who confide in me, and I’ve been privy to one side of a very awkward office romance. Both parties involved are cheating on SOs, and for one of the girls, it’s her first relationship with another woman. She’s kept me very informed about details since she first became interested in the other woman (who happens to be her boss). And although I’m also good friends with the boss, the boss has no idea that I know what’s going. Very weird, but entertaining at times.
I’m still privy to it. If you ask me to keep a secret, boy, I keep it, without ever telling anyone.
Could it be…Matthew McConnaughey (sp?) I know you’re not going to tell but he jumped into my head as soon as I read your post.
I read shooting scripts to movies and t.v. shows before they were released/aired and knew about plot twists, deaths, surprise endings, yada yada. I have not signed anything that says I can’t or won’t release this info but I’m not an ass so I don’t share what I know with others. I don’t want to ruin anyone’s fun.
I’ve known, very reluctantly, about cheating spouses. I know of a few friends’ abortions and a friend who was a stripper years ago but is hush about it because she is now a mother.
People have a tendency to share very private things with me because telling me a secret is as safe as telling a corpse.
I also know who from my company will be fired when it changes hands and let me tell you a secret, I’m so freakin’ happy this person is getting the axe I could just crap my pants.
I used to desktop research reports for an investment firm. Some of the info was pretty sensitive. For instance, I would get the quarterly numbers for our firm (publically traded) before they were officially released. I could have bought or sold knowing that (one reason why employees of an investment firm pay no commissions and have to let their boss know if they set up an account in another firm).
I also had information about how we were planning to rate stocks. That could be pretty sensitive – once I was even targeted as part of an SEC investigation for insider trading on my part. The company was just trying to take revenge for getting a bad rating (the report ended up as a feature in Forbes).
I would have sent Spider-Man to trash their offices, only he worked for them.
Later, as SFWA treasurer, I granted requests for dues waivers from people who couldn’t afford them. Some pretty successful authors had to delay or waive their dues payments.
I run the computer network at my job and see a lot of things other employees do that they don’t think anyone knows about. For example, I know of a co-worker who runs a swinger group in the area… And of course, I know about most of the “secret” office romances going on…
Nope.
My lesbian sister had an affair with Rosie O’Donnell about 20 years back, but now that Rosie’s out, it’s not much of a secret.
I know a former major league baseball player now in the Hall of Fame who blames his former manager for pulling him out of the lineup and pushing him into retirement. I also know that the true story was that the team ownership that decided it was time for the player to retire and ordered the manager to make it happen. The player and the owners reached an agreement (including one of those sentimental “retirement tours” around the league, and quite possibly some financial compensation) so the player wouldn’t blast the ownership, but he still continues to publicly blame the manager.
So what is Tom Cruise like in person?
I kid, I kid. Tom doesn’t pass for straight.
Again, just kidding! No need to sic any Scientolawyers on me Mr. Cruise, just a mere jest.
On a personal level, I know the details of any number of Things (romantic interests/conquests/cheatings/etc, family situations, etc) that I either picked up simply by overhearing various snippets, or by someone who was properly ‘in the know’ venting to me. I tend to collect gossip simply because I’m horridly nosy and curious: I never repeat it.
Other than that: I’ve gotten to read a few books before publication, but that’s not really ‘secret’. When I was little, I found out about several major corporate mergers/layoffs/etc a few days before the general public, since my father tended to work for the wrong company at the wrong time.
In high school, there were maybe four or five times when I was privy to “private” information which I overheard and/or teachers accidentally gossiped to me. One of them was a fairly big deal, which could have potentially resulted in the school district getting sued.
A while ago I did work for the government involving Iraq. I was going to get a clearance (the lowest level, “Confidential”), but due to time constraints they backed off on having me go through the process. I did a bit of work which was not technically secret, in that I could say what I did in general, but I was told it was “unwise” to do so at the time, and I was prohibited by contract anyhow. I was given a computer which was one of the only ones where even the head of IT security himself did not have authority to log onto, and I had to use a swipe-card to get into the room where it was.
I got to meet two real “spies” at the project close and it was quite interesting.
I’ll bet it’s that actor who always walked around on his hind legs . . . Oh, you know, Rory Calhoun?
My plan to take over the world.
While I have no problem with gay guys, I would immediately drop anyone (gay or straight) who confess to sleeping with “Mr. Cruise.” (insert barfy smiley here)
I used to work on the plans for the nuclear finale to WW-III in Europe. Not all that exciting really, just long lists of places that would be vaoprized if we still had the forces available to do so, plus a very complicated scheduling system to try to avoid planes and missiles flying through each others’ mushrooms.
I’m not sure if those plans are still being kept up to date by my successors, but I’d bet they are.
I knew who Deep Throat was.
I have known about people under investigation or for whom indictments were pending, or the intended targets of drug raids while still in the planning phase. I’ve also been in the know on who is snitching on whom and to whom they are snitching (Feds, local vice, whoever.) It’s interesting when you see the subjects in everyday settings and know stuff about them like that.
My sister told me that she was pregnant practically before the line had fully developed on the test. She was about 3 weeks along. I kept the secret from everyone—including my husband and people who don’t even know her, just in case—until she was ready to tell the world at 13 weeks.
I used to be pretty lousy at keeping secrets, but I have really earned the right to be trusted with them now.