This always happens to me any time I meet a girl. We get to talking, everythings going great, I get her number, we dance, she seems totally into me until she asks what my job is. I say “I’m a computer programmer” and she says “oh. Well nice to meet you I have to go.”
Whats the deal? Why does my job matter so much?
This is even more confusing because when I met my last GF I said “I don’t have a job, I live in my truck, and I have no money.” We hooked up, I got a job and a place and she broke up with me.
dating Computer programmers… kinda like living in Alaska:
The odds are good but the goods are odd.
Some girls think geeks are groovy… then again some think "'I’m going to want to go out dancing and he’s going to say “not tonight honey, my Everquest Guild has a meeting. I might be done in one, or three, or twelve hours.”
Wow I dunno, I’d be all over you. It’s better to get rid of the shallow ones before it goes anywhere anyway but that would suck if this is a common thing.
Dude, we’re never going to understand girls. I don’t even think they understand themselves.
I am interested in a answer from some ladies though.
How important are these things to you? Type of job? Where we live?
A Computer Programmer seems like a pretty impressive job to me.
Maybe they think that Computer Programmer is commonly associated with Nerds.
Nerds=unexciting. So, it scares them off? Who knows?
Shouldn’t this be in IMHO?
-Shaggarito
(Proud of his first “You’re in the wrong forum comment”.)
I’d consider it an effective screening technique, this coming from a mech. engineer. I’ve gotten the brush-off too, and I realized I was better off without the company of someone who was so judgmental.
Sounds like you got the better end of the deal to me. On the other hand, if this is all you’re after, come up with a better cover story. Just don’t be hurt if it backfires too.
Hm. We sometimes don’t understand ourselves, but that’s mostly during that time of the month when you flee.
As for your question: IMHO, I think that the most important thing is to have a job, or to be going to university/trade school/etc., or to do something else that is productive & somewhat forward-thinking. Where a guy lives/what he drives/etc. isn’t as important to me as whether he has life goals & is working to achieve them.
Maybe they think you’re too “techhy”. Like you don’t have a side that appreciates the arts and such. Generally I think it’s bad form to ask someone what they do right up front. It’s better to start with, “So what are your interests?” That way, you get the whole picture.
Oh yah! Im working on some very exciting software right now! I get to take databases for business software, write dummy proof gui’s around them and get them to stay synced remotely! Hey! Where are you going? Come back! Please! I’m not done telling you about it yet!
Well, I don’t understand myself, so you’re right about that.
For your questions, I can’t say I care what type of job a guy has, as long as he’s got all his teeth and maybe a smattering of intelligence. Of course, there are certain jobs that would probably not score high on my list. “Oh, I’m the guy who drains the blood from veal,” is probably something I should put on my list of turnoffs. But “I’m a computer programmer” definitely wouldn’t send me screaming. It implies that you’re smart, maybe a little geeky, and I’ve yet to meet a computer programmer with an atrocious sense of humor. The fact that most programmers make at least decent money is another plus.
And nerds don’t scare me off. I love nerds. Nerds, geeks, dorks, all of them. It’s been my experience that an adorable little dork is more attentive than a big manly-man, usually sweeter, and always more interesting to talk to.
I don’t think I’ll tell my brother about this thread. He’s in programming school right now.
I think you need to start looking elsewhere for dates. Lots of us female-type people like geeks. Every guy I’ve ever been interested in was geeky. I consider “geeky” a compliment, so if I call you that, it’s a term of endearment.
'Scuse me, I gotta go watch B5 now. I never said I wasn’t a geek too…
