OK, dopers, buck up and admit it. I want to know the absolute dumbest car you ever had opportunity to own. Not necessarily the worst, but the goofiest.
And to show how much I’m humbling myself before you, I’ll start by saying I once owned a:
1976 AMC Pacer D/L - exactly as shown in this photo
And I LIKED it!
OK, I’ve humiliated myself enough. Your turn
Jeep FJ6-A Postal van (the FJ-6 on this page looks similar.)
Don’t laugh. Mine had a Ford 289 in it and would go 85 (it had too much frontal area to go any faster.) Between the power and a badly designed transmission linkage it broke engine mounts on a regular basis.
HA - My mom had a Pacer. I think the goofiest car I ever had was an old Ford Escort EXP - it was awful. I had to keep the air on in the winter at red light to keep the car from stalling out. It also had this really ugly black vent that was on the hatchback window.
I once owned a BMW Isetta. I might still own it if parts hadn’t got so hard to get that it became too much of a hassle.
It was perfect for running around town, got great gas mileage and was surprisingly roomy.
Okay, I admit it. I had an X-90
The sad thing is I traded in a '74 Monte Carlo to get it.
I’m still in repentance.
Austin Healey Bug Eye Sprite
Tiny Tiny Car.
Wow, NEVER would I have guessed that Stever Urkel’s (ya know, from Family Matters), was a BMW.
I owned a Citroen 2CV, just like this one.
Damn! I loved that car - it was written off when some idiot (ignoring a stop sign) pulled out of a side road right in front of me; I was doing about 40mph - the 2CV ended up a foot or so shorter in length; the other car was slightly dented.
It’s got to be one of the quirkiest cars ever made; if the starter motor fails, the crank handle of the lifting jack can be inserted through a hole in the front grille and the engine can be turned over manually; the air conditioning system consists of a turnwheel that opens a flap below the windscreen - when it is open on a hot day, you can see right through it.
Once I was partially blocked into a parking space, so I just picked up the rear end of the car and moved it sideways.
Well, my first car was a 1980 Plymouth Horizon. It was purple and it had a sunroof. Sometimes it wouldn’t start and I had to crawl under the car and manually turn the flywheel. For some reason the sunroof didn’t close properly and I had to use Duct tape on it if I was going down the highway. The passenger side door was dented in and couldn’t open, until a boyfriend decided to pry it open with a crowbar, then it didn’t close at all. I used a bunjee cord to hold it shut.
It was a great car. I got a lot of attention driving it around. Eventually I sold it to a friend for $25.00.
I also had a 1970s ford station wagon that was purple and had Tweety Bird painted on both sides.
A red Pinto, 1979. My first car. Also the location of my first…well, you know;)
Geo Metro. The “roller-skate” car.
It carried me and my sister through our college years…and yes, it went 80 mph on I-94 back and fourth from WMU to Detroit.
It also fits 5 students nicely as well as all the luggage-- I swear!
I can’t believe I was seen in a car like that— I must have looked kinda funny.
0.5L, 2-cylinder air-cooled engine.
Manual brakes, steering, windows, door locks, choke and primer.
4 on the floor, max speed about 80 terrifying mph.
It was similar to a Yugo, but with much less power. I owned it while stationed in Italy.
My dad had a 1981 Blue Chevy Station Wagon for years and years and years. It stopped running in about 1990, he didn’t get rid of it until 2000. It just sat and sat in our driveway, and it embarrassed me so much when I was in high school.
In my senior year, my friends and I joked about it all the time. My school sent someone to our school to talk about senior pictures, he said you could get your picture taken with your car, and all my friends cheered “Go for it! With the wagon, do it! Woo!” It was hilarious, though I didn’t get the picture.
Not nearly as cool as y’alls cars but I still own a 1973 Jeep Commando that gives me plenty of opportunity to stay in shape by being forced to walk home any and everytime I drive it. Actually, I don’t drive it anymore at all unless I have pre-arrainged for someone to be available to tow me home. I have a tow-bar welded to a receiver that mounts up front, so its easy to hook and go.
I will never, ever buy a AMC-powered vehicle again. The AMC V8 has a serious design flaw in the cam/distributor drive area.
Fagjunk Theology: Not just for sodomite propagandists anymore.
1974 Pontiac Astre Safari Wagon
Mine was dark green with “woody” panels. It was a hand-me-down which I owned for about 2 weeks until the block cracked or something. Which was probably for the best. 
1963 Dodge Dart, punch-a-matic transmission. Painted sky blue with white racing stripes. The previous owner wanted a sunroof so he got a hacksaw, cut a rectangular hole in the roof, and bolted a piece of blue plexiglass to the roof. He also wanted shoulder straps, so he got an extra pair of seatbelts and bolted one end to the roof, attached the other to the bolt the lap belts were attached to.
I used to work someplace where they made me park on the street, rather than use the employee parking lot.
My first vehicle was a white 1976 Honda Civic. It had pink racing stripes and the windows were tinted a dark chocolate color. The interior was tan, but had been dyed with a pinkish colored stain, and had brown and white striped seat covers.
It looked like a scoop of neopolitan ice cream driving down the street. 
Syl.
Ah, memories. My first car was a '74 Pinto, picked up at an auction for $200 (including all taxes, fees, and it already had the emission test done). In college, a friend dubbed it “Bondo”, since the color matched. The back seat would theoretically hold three people, but they had to be really close friends. Dinky engine, tiny (balding) tires, and you had to pull straight up on the driver’s side door when you closed it or it wouldn’t latch. Unfortunately, Bondo had to be sent to that big scrapheap in the sky when the engine block cracked one cold winter.
God I loved that car…
On a scary note, last year I decided to celebrate paying off my student loans by getting a brand new sports car (I don’t think I’d know what to do with myself if I wasn’t in debt :)) . After some researching, I decided I liked the 2002 Mustang. It was only after buying one and getting it home that I realized the silver color I asked for perfectly matched the old Pinto.
I’ve dubbed the Mustang “Bondo II”
1980 Renault Le Car (See here for a generic picture). Kind of silly looking, and had some mechanical problems, but I liked it a lot.
Worst problem was the windows. They were hinged to the frame, and the hinges were glued to the glass. The glue would fail and the windows would fall out. I had to use duct tape to keep them on.
The controls were also a bit strange. The headlight control switch was on a stick on the left side of the steering wheel, right next to the turn signal. If you weren’t used to it, you’d go to signal a turn and accidentally switch from headlights to parking lights.
It was a two door, and to get to the back seat, the entire front seat lifted up and forward. However, it carried a lot of cargo for its size and was dependable until the Schenectady winters rusted it out.
