A year. I was working abroad and we had been together four years at that point. No reliable email, but I did have cheap long distance, so we talked on the phone a lot. I wish he could have visited, but it just didn’t work out. It wasn’t as bad as all that, though. We both kept busy and it was nice, after having been together so long, to have that “getting to know you” feeling back again for a bit.
Since then, though, for about a week a couple times a year, I guess. Our work calls us away for different reasons. We both love it–it’s great to have the house to yourself once in a while.
About a week, back when we were dating. He went on a business trip. It worked out for the best that he was not around that week, because I had to put my cat down. I was devastated and not fit company for anyone.
A little more than two months while in Basic Training, then about a month at a time several times a year for the next three years. We’d only been married two years when I went in, so the separations were pretty traumatic for us. But the reunions were – well, it was in Europe, so we count that as our honeymoon.
We have been separated for about a year twice in the last four years. In the three years prior to that, 2 six month separations. Over the last couple of years, a month at a time three times.
I am always the one to go, so it is a bit easier for me. I get to see new places and different people. She has to stay home and find things to do. She eats out more often and gets to watch her favorite TV shows. She visits her friends more. We try to communicate as often as the situation permits in whatever form it is. We have a 15 month separation coming up in the near future. That will be the longest, but I think we will be ok. We have done well with the 12 months.
Currently it’s been nine months since I’ve seen him, and it’ll be another three months before I see him again. Fortunately, when that time comes, it’ll be the end of us being long-distance.
The bad: You miss them all the time. You can’t be there with them when life happens: birthdays, promotions, bad days, etc. Prolonged time apart can make you feel like your life is on hold, because you can’t do things with them until they return. Also, it sucks.
The good: You really appreciate the time you get to spend with them, and you make the most of the time you have. Once they’re back, doing even mundane things like walking down the street is exciting and new, just because they’re there. And nothing beats the feeling of finally having them alone and being able to tear their clothes off.
After being together for about a year and a half, and seeing each other at least once a week during that time (usually more often) he had to go to Florida for a month for some on-site job work. Shortly before he left, his dad had a stroke, so the trip ended up being extended by an extra two months while he was helping his family (in Georgia) deal with the crisis. Three months, all told, that we didn’t see each other. It turned out to be pretty easy for both of us to get along without each other, which was one of the big clues that the relationship just wasn’t working out. (There had been plenty of other clues before this, which we had both steadfastly ignored until then.) We broke up about two weeks after he got back.
Which is probably not hugely reassuring to you, but there it is.
We’ve been married for almost 9 years. I think the most we’ve spent apart is a week when my wife went to help out at a camp for kids with cerebral palsy.
But in two weeks, when I go to the Grand Canyon with my parents (and not her) we’ll break that record because I will be gone for 10 days.
I appreciate you sharing that, and I’m sorry to hear it.
I’m not worried about us having that kind of issue, though. My only true threat is that she loves men with British accents, so there’s some chance she may love it there and not come back at all! But if she does return, it’ll be a happy reunion.
I’ve been with my SO for almost three years, and of that, we only lived in the same state for about 6 months. We usually see each other once every month or six weeks, but we’ve gone several months at a stretch without seeing each other. We talk on the phone about five times a day.
With the ex, it was six weeks when I was in Russia. We emailed, chatted, texted and spoke on the phone, and it was eased by the fact that I was having a blast, but I still missed her a lot.
With the current SO… well, a lifetime so far. Will get back when I meet the blighter.
Before we were married, we never lived closer than 600 miles from each other. We probably spent no more than a week in a row together during all that time, and that was after we were engaged.
This went on for 6 years, before we were married. We weren’t even talking during some of that time. Our relationship is stronger since we had the opportunity to prove to ourselves that no one else would do. (Married over 29 years now.)
After we were married, she hurt her back at about 6 years, and had to stay in bed for over a month. She and our daughter stayed with her parents, 50 miles away, and I drove over to see them over the weekend.
14 years after we got married, for a book she wanted to do, she took the kids around the country in an RV. The first leg was February to June, and I saw her once. The second was July to the end of August.
When my future wife and I were students in Hawaii, we knew several foreign students who had left their spouses back home to go to Hawaii and study for a number of years. They would usually go back and spend the summer break with their spouses, but one Thai student in particular who was a good friend of ours was working on her doctorate. A very dedicated student, she studied year-round. I think over a period of three years, she may have seen her husband once. (And their daughter, who remained with the father in Bangkok.) She went home to visit that one time and returned pregnant. We joked that they should name the child after the airport, Don Muang, since she probably jumped her husband’s bones as soon as she left the airplane. A great lady; sadly, she died of breast cancer a few years ago.
Before we got married, my girlfriend and I had a three-year long distance relationship. We met in the army, but because our MOS’s were different, we were transferred to opposite ends of the globe. We arranged our leaves so that we could see each other for about two weeks over each year, and we worked hard at keeping in touch (Lots of cards and phone calls, and such). I missed her like hell, but boy, after three years of beating the relationship odds, I knew beyond a doubt that she was “The One”.
I like to joke that AT&T’s stock dropped five points when we finally got discharged and hitched.
We’ve been married for close to ten years, and the longest we’ve been separated was when I had to hop a train to take care of my grandmother for a week. THAT was a long week. I’ve definitely grown accustomed to her.
A year or so after we were married DH went out of state to look for work. Two of the longest weeks of our lives while he busted his butt earning enough money to rent a place and come home to get me.
Last year I went across the country for two weeks to stay with our daughter when she gave birth. That was a little easier because DH had our teenagers to keep him company and I had a new grand baby to snuggle. Still, I couldn’t wait to get home.
Been married 8 years and we tend to live in different cities. Even though we currently have lived in the same city for almost two years, we travel enough that we see each other probably two days a week. It works surprisingly well. Any more time together and she’d realize what an ass I am.
Before we were married, I went away for a week and a half to wedding-plan with my Maid of Honour. After we’ve been married, I think there have been two weekends when we’ve been apart. Together for eight years, married for four and a half. We’ve spent damn near every day together.
Hmm. Maybe not. He was working night shift work for a year, which could be classified as its own special kind of apartness.
And I write this message from a hotel room 1000 miles from home, and I don’t actually know what city my wife is in right now. But she isn’t within 1000 miles of home base either.
