Italian: The kind that you start hearing when you’re mixing your spaghetti and sauce. (LUMP da-DUH da-DUH da-DUh, da-DUH da-DUH da-duh-duh-DUH)
Russian: The kind that you hear when you squat down hand give out a leg kick. (duh-duh-LUMP duh-duh-LUMP duh-duh-LUMP dum, dum-dum dum-dum dum-dum kick!)
:smack: “. . . squat down and. . . .”
I think the first one is Tartanelli something.
Whenever I squat down and give out a leg kick, I hear the theme from Zorro, the Gay Blade. Actually I hear that pretty much all the time for some reason.
You might be thinking of either Meadowland(number 2 on this playlist) or
…or Volga Boat Song (which I can’t find online).
I posted a bit early above- happens to all men from time to time.
I know I read the name of that kind of dance once. I can’t remember it and I’ve never been able to find it again.
The classic italian music is the Tarantella
Hm, the russian one is possibly the Sabre Dance, or possibly Meadowlands [which i think is also called Oh Fields, My Fields [my copy is off The Best of the Red Army Choir - The Definitive Collection Disc 2]
I do know Sabre Dance- but the name of the Russian dance (the one where you keep your back straight while kicking with your butt almost one the floor) is what I can’t remember. I think it starts with a K.
You mean Cossacks?
I thought that was the people, not the dance.
FOr the Italian one, I know exactly what you’re talking about. I remember it because waaay back when, McDonald’s had pizza. And the commercial was kind of like this:
“It’s a pizza Happy Meal!
Pepperoni and cheese…
Da-duh da-duh da-duh da-duh
May I have more please?”
To THAT TUNE. I get it stuck in my head all the time. In fact, THANKS a LOT! 
It’s both, really. Kazaki = Cossacks.
More than you wanted/needed to know: “Tarantella” is Italian for “spider.” The tune comes with a legend (undoubtedly bogus, but all good stories are). Supposedly, in olden times, if you were bitten by a poisonous spider, it was believed the only cure was to sweat out the venom… and the only way to work up enough sweat was to make you dance endlessly.
Hence the tune, which is supposed to have irresistible powers to make you dance.
I thought ithe Cossack dance was called a gopak
You know; where the dancers bounce and kick on their haunches, while funneling funds to Republican Party candidates.
Maybe I’m reading your duh’s and lumps wrong but the Spaghetti-music you made me think of is : “Funiculi, Funicula” listen here.
According to this site, the gopak/hopak seems to be a different dance. The Cossack dance is simply called the Cossack’s Dance on that reference, which is also how I’ve always known it.
I’m no expert in Russian folk dances, but my understanding has always been that the squat-kick dance was the gopak/hopak (Ukrainians pronounce the Cyrillic г as an aspirated ‘h’, hence the variant spelling). There is however also a dance called the kazachok (“little Cossack”), which according to my (Russian) wife also involves folded arms and kicks, but no squatting.
You bastard. I had that song, with those lyrics, stuck in my head for YEARS, and it didn’t help that every time you scored with the Boston Bruins in NHL94, it would play that song.
Before I got to this post, I thought the OP was talking about the Olive Garden theme song, which is Mendellsohn’s Symphony 4. I still have no idea what that song actually is, other than the Pizza Happy Meal song…
Actually, looking at my site again, the gopak/hopak does fit the stereotypical description of the Cossack dance.