I once cooked a box and the folks there ate it.
No shit, I was at a party that had been going on for awhile. There’d been a lot of smoke and everybody was starving. It was too far from town to deliver and NOBODY was gonna drive. A buddy of mine there said, “shit old Jay here could cook a box and it’d taste good.”
In all honesty, I am a pretty fair cook.
Of course everyone laughed and said bullshit…
So, I went into the kitchen, and believe me the cupboard was BARE. I found a few spices, some cornstarch or flower (I forget which now), a potato and an onion. So I got busy and made a roux. Had my buddy tear the tops off of a box and shred it into tiny pieces and soaked them in water while I was making my stew. I added the cardboard to the pot and slow cooked it for about an hour until everything was done.
Guess what? They ate the whole fucking pot! and wanted more… we still laugh our asses off about that every now and then.
Next… 
Once in desperation I melted real butter and added half a container of grated Parmesan cheese, then cooked it till it was brown. Guess what? This heart killer is wonderful!
I made it for a week one time Annie with nothing but a big can of parmesan cheese a pound of butter and a stack of flour tortillas. Saved my ass it did. Hell, just last month I got in a bind and ate grits for almost a week.
:eek: (grits for food and instant coffee or ice water) I found a box of instant (just add water) pancakes and made do with that for the next few days.
Once in college, I was making Kraft mac n’ cheese, and I decided to add some tuna. Mmm, that should taste good, what else can I put in? I started rummaging through the fridge. I ended up adding the tuna, onion, cooked ground beef, avocado and cashews to the mac n’ cheese. WOW it was delicious…for about ten bites. Then my stomach started to hurt. Uh-oh…too rich for my blood. 
Strangest thing yet
A full-blown omelette. Peppers, cheese, ham, onions, you name it.
(What? I like comfort foods. :P)
:o Oh no! Not this thread.
Well, about 5 minutes ago: Half of a low-carb tortilla.
Yesterday: A low-carb tortilla with a couple pieces of turkey lunchmeat with some parmesan cheese and Taco Bell hot sauce.
In no particular order:
Eggs and tuna omelette (AAAH! Wasn’t good.)
A cheeseburger with mayo and grilled onions on an english muffin (delicious)
A piece of bologna with ketchup, rolled up (parmesan cheese optional)
A can of chicken with a bowl of spinach, and a bit of dressing.
lol, I hate living in the dorms. I can’t cook.
Back in my high school days, a friend’s parent’s went out of town, and you’ll never guess what we spent the grocery money on…
At about the 10 day mark, there was very little food left. After a marathon smoke session, when everything was closed, we all had a nice round of Kraft crunchy peanut butter filled ice cream cones.
Never wanted milk more badly in my life.
Post Toasties and ants. I was eating them dry from the box and noticed that they seemed unusually piquant. Ate four or five additional handfuls anyway. Next morning, all sobered up, I was cleaning up and noted that the box was infested with little red grease ants.
Two words: squid jerky.
Turns out it’s pretty damned tasty.
Ok, we got kinda high last night and we mixed together 1 container of Phildelphia Cream Cheese and 1 jar of Kraft Marshmallow Cream. Once it was mixed really well we used it as dip for strawberries.
My friend said that he had had it before, but I had never tried it. Oh. My God.
That was awesome.
I take it your local market doesn’t carry decomposed waste?
I watched a friend of mine eat a whole can of Strongheart’s Liver flavored dogfood that he thought was a can of refried beans.
Dried pasta. Bowties are the best.
Dog treats.
Cheez-It crackers dipped in caramel.
About once a month or so I take barbeque potato chips and crush them up really well and then combine them with cottage cheese. It can cause the rest of my co-workers to leave the lunchroom.
One word: scrapple.
I do this with the crumbs at the bottom of the potato chip bag, only I use ketchup. It’s a pain in the ass to have all those crumbs, but I don’t want to throw them out.
So, pour them into a bowl, pour on some ketchup, mix it up, and eat it with a spoon. Now that’s good eatin’!
I’m trying to save money at the moment and was starving earlier when all I had in the fridge was an onion so I did what any starving person would do… I cut off the ends, sliced it to allow better heat transfer and baked it for thirty minutes.
It wasn’t one of my better experiments.