Traffic definitely. I couldn’t stay awake, let alone stay interested.
Twister was definitely laughable. But I watch it anyway because it was filmed around the area where I grew up, and I can spot something familiar each time I watch it that I hadn’t seen before. Flying cows? The suck zone? An entire house rolling out onto the street in front of them? sigh And it really had potential to be a good movie…
I thought Moulin Rouge was a period piece…imagine my surprise. A Knight’s Tale handled it much better.
Now, I liked Titanic, I’m a Trekker so I’ll just say you’re not alone on STV, but if we can edge this over to include TV Miniseries then my biggest disappointment was the adaptation of Mists of Avalon on TNT. Oh my god, did they even BOTHER to read the book?
I was also very disgusted with that Volcano eruption movie with Linda Hamilton and Pierce Brosnan…they risk life and limb to rescue her mother from the edge of the erupting mountain, kids in tow, and Grandma stubbornly won’t leave? Hey bitch, they’re trying to save your life!!!
Has no one mentioned Rollerball (2001)? Absolute garbage.
Yes, I have read through this entire thread, and to my utter shock and amazement, no one has mentioned The Other Sister, starring Juliette Lewis and Giovanni Ribisi as two developmentally disabled kids that fall in love. They both adopt the most unconvincing manner of speech and movement that you have ever witnessed on celluloid, while saying perfectly timed darn-they’re-adorable zingers like trained seals. Ex: “Who do you think thought up sex anyway?” “I think it was Madonna.” ::Dooku craps in his hand, flings it at the screen::
No amount of hypnosis, drug therapy, money, or torture will convince me that there exists another movie that is a bigger piece of festering, moldy, pustule-covered SHIT.
It is kind of interesting to go through this and see how many movies mentioned you actually liked. There were a couple for me in here, notably Traffic and The Player that I really liked. The Professional I liked. Hell, The Adventures of Buckaroo Bonzai across the 8th Dimension I liked!
But kaylasdad99 had to go and mention The Lair of The White Worm, thereby sentencing me to another 10 years of psychotherapy. Just when I thought that wound had finally healed too.
My hair was falling out in clumps after that movie. My cat wouldn’t come near me after watching that movie, such was the unspeakable stench.
Phantasm. To this day, I have no idea what the hell that movie was about. It just defied every precept of logic.
Dune. I can’t decide whether having read the book beforehand made it better or worse. I wasn’t as confused as the other moviegoers must have been, but I was horrified to see what they had done to Frank Herbert’s material.
The Brothers McMullen. Why would anyone want to watch a movie about three such self-centered, hypocritical, boring assholes?
Phantasm. To this day, I have no idea what the hell that movie was about. It just defied every precept of logic. :eek:
Dune. I can’t decide whether having read the book beforehand made it better or worse. I wasn’t as confused as the other moviegoers must have been, but I was horrified to see what they had done to Frank Herbert’s material. :mad:
The Brothers McMullen. Why would anyone want to watch a movie about three such self-centered, hypocritical, boring assholes? 
Monty2: I loved The Professional. Jean Reno rocks.
Anyway, I’ve seen most of the MST3K run. Confining this to big-studio pictures, the worst two movies I’ve ever had the misfortune to sit through were The Thin Red Line and The Legend of Bagger Vance. Gah. Gaaaaaaaaah.
I don’t think anybody mentioned Yentel, or an even worse Streissand film, On A Clear Day You Can See Forever. Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls was mentioned, but did you know it was written by Roger (“thumbs up somewhere”) Ebert? Another truly awful film was Judge Dredd, which made Stallone look even worse than usual. And Earth Girls Are Easy, well, what can I say?
Moonraker. This film was awful. James Bond in outer space, with a fucking LASER BATTLE! Yes, it’s that stupid. And he even has sex in outer space to boot.
Wishmaster. The fact that they made two sequels to this tripe does one of three things for me:
It only does one of these things (Hint: It ain’t #1 or #2)
Space Cowboys. Old farts dancing around in a movie that ripped off Armageddon. If you rip off a bad movie, that says something.
Feeders 2. Oh god, words cannot describe this one. It has Mark Polonia in it. That’s enough.
A-fucking-men about Anaconda and Battlefield Earth.
Aww c’mon people… I can see that no-one on this board has really trully suffered at the movies. I have! I’m generally an easy going type that can see almost anything and always come out of it with seeing at least something about the movie that was ok(ish) at least.
But after seeing a movie called something like “Cowgirls get the blues” or something to that effect, I’ve gotta say that feeling injured and in pain is something I never expected to feel after viewing a movie. This one did it to me. I only even watched half of it. That says a lot for me! That movie SUCKED THE BIG ONE man… I defy anyone out there to find me a worse one!!!
You might want to read Mr. Cranky’s review on this one. 
You’re probably right, airdisc, but the last couple of lkines were pretty good.
Moneypenny: “What’s he doing up there?”
Q: “I think he’s attempting re-entry.”
A great line. 
Of course, that’s "last couple of lines.
astro, which version of Dune? The new one put out last year (by SciFi, IIRC) wasn’t half bad. Of course, it was also something like 6 hours long…
First Knight was horrid. Think Arthurian legend, then think of all the ways it could be made really bad. The resulting movie is worse.
And let’s not forget, The Nutty Professor II: Meet the Klumps. The original was in poor taste, but funny. This one was just plain horrible. Excruciatingly painful to watch. The only movie I’ve taken breaks from in the theater.
Lady Hawke. Think really crappy medieval story about a young footpad, and two lovers who become different animals: He is a man by day, and a wolf by night. She is a hawk by day, and a woman by night. Now add horrible early 80’s synth-music to the mix. You’d think that they’d at least have a suitable, sweeping score for the film, but NOOOOO!!! It’s all synthesizer tones. It just doesn’t work. Bad acting further ruins what could have been an interesting story. But really, it was doomed from the start.
Earth Girls are Easy is redeemed for the hilarious music video interlude of Julie Brown’s comedy smash, “'Cause I’m a Blonde”. Easily worth the price of admission alone.
And hey, it’s got Angelique in it!
They Still Call Me Bruce.
I live in fear that one day aliens will see it and decide to obliterate us all for this movie alone.
Even worse, I will be forced to agree with them…
Zardoz - Though seeing Sean Connery in a wedding dress was
rather unusual.
:::cracking knuckles:::
Dieter, I wanna see you outside.
(Kidding!)
Definately Soul Survivor with Cop Land coming in a close second. Blair Witch 2; Book of Shadows a third.
I worked in a video store and saw a LOT of BAAAAAAAAD movies. At least I didn’t pay for them!!