Leela: OK, if everyone’s finished being stupid— Fry: I had more, but you go ahead.
and:
Fry: My girlfriend had one of those. Actually it wasn’t hers, it was her dad’s. And she wasn’t my girlfriend, she just lived next door and never closed her curtains. Leela: Fry, remember I when I told you about always ending your stories a sentence earlier?
and:
“Scooty-Puff Jr. suuuuuuuucks!”
with an honorable mention to:
Fry: I did do the nasty in the pasty! Nibblonian 2: Verily. And that past nastification is what shields you from the brains.
Oh, and I fully endorse hogarth’s first quote above. Both mine and hogarth’s are worthy of multiple real-life usage when the opportunity arises. What more can you ask?
Professor Farnsworth on the phone:
“Oh, how awful! Did he at least die painlessly?”
" … to shreds, you say. Well, how’s his wife holding up?"
" … to shreds, you say."
Leela: “Hey, is that a Hobbit over there?”
Bender: “Nah, that’s just a hobo and a rabbit, but they’re makin’ a Hobbit.”
My wife and kids use this a lot, “So long jerkwads!” “So long!”
I also like using Bender’s line, “Oh! Your! God!” It’s particularily satisfying as an atheist.
Antibob got my probable all time fave with the quantum finish
a couple others
Bubblegum Tate: “Bender, you can talk trash, you can handle the ball, but look in your heart and ask yourself, are you funky enough to be a globetrotter? Are you?”
Bender: “Yes.”
Bubblegum Tate : “Are you?”
Bender: “I mean, with time, my funk level could…”
Bubblegum Tate: “Are you?”
Bender: “…no…”
Bubblegum Tate: “Deal with it.”
then a little late in that episode;
Bender: “What does anything matter? I’ll never be a Globetrotter. My life, and, by extension, everyone else’s, is meaningless.”
Fry: “It’s just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns. Also he got a race car. Is any of this getting through to you?”