That once its announced that the Nomination was won, one of the candidates will step on stage, shake his head violently, his clown face will disappear, and he’ll morph into Violator…
Linoleum inherently attracts peanut butter and repels bread. But the industry is covering it up to keep us from all converting to tile floors.
Tony Romo is part of a sinister plot to destroy the Cowboys from within. There’s no other explanation for why he offsets every instance of quaterbacking brilliance with an equal act of abject stupidity.
The whole UK Brexit vote, and its ensuing political intrigues, was carefully planned and orchestrated to make Theresa May the PM without going through the normal election process.
The Eskimos are now up to something else…
Franklin D. Roosevelt got the Supreme Court to abandon strict federalism and start making expansive rulings not by threatening to pack the court but by having J. Edgar Hoover amass blackmail files on all the justices.
Mine is, the “Miracle on Ice” hockey game in 1980 was thrown by the Soviets in an attempt to get USA to show up in Moscow for the Summer Olympics. (Think about it; the Soviets pretty much hand the puck to the Americans with three seconds left in the first period, the Americans score, and then arguably the best ice hockey goalie in the history of the sport is replaced for a period.)
My totally made up CP is that the oil companies pay off the various local governments to intentionally screw up traffic light timing. This is so we can all sit in idling in traffic and burn more gas.
I only came up with this theory when I couldn’t think up another reason that traffic light timing is so freaking stupid.
If God exists His threat of eternal punishment is just a bluff despite how glorious my sisters’ pastor thinks it is:
Web sites do this for products you search for. If you don’t buy immediately, the price goes up, then they deluge you with ads for that product. Just in case you forgot about it, y’know.
No shit; this ain’t a conspiracy, it’s a fact.
LED lighting has been pushed into wide use because every chip includes surveillance equipment. Most bulbs are audio only, but certain others, like floodlights, also include video observation. The signals are sent over carrier-current connections to local NSA collection points.
I have read this entire thread (most amusing) and have not seen this obvious one: Dubya was a conscious agent of the Iranian government. Think of how much Iran has benefitted from Dubya’s decision. First he destroys their main adversary, then he puts their coreligionist Shiites in charge of Iraq.