Yeah, good luck with that. You just showed everyone where your shiny, shiny buttons are. Expect them to be pressed repeatedly.
Hi, Diosa!!! :: waves frantically :: Don’t think you weren’t missed because you were. 
Well, one. 
I’m one of the most sensitive-to-sexism people I know, and I’m not afraid to say something when the matter comes up. So please read my post as someone who is philosophically on your side.
Although you have a perfect right not to have your boobs talked about if you don’t want them talked about, this is not sexism. This is lighthearted banter. Having one’s boobs be a topic of conversation doesn’t have to be any more charged than having a discussion about pretty ankles, or necks, or legs.
I generally enjoy your posts, but this OP basically accuses anyone who disagrees with you of sexism, and I find that somewhat offensive.
Jumped on it? Jumped? I think you just broke my overreaction detector. dba Fred’s link was broken. I fixed it with a reference to the original thread title:
That’s jumping on it? Egad. Get a grip.
By the way, did anyone let dba Fred know he’s the subject of this thread?
(FTR, if anyone wants a mod to check the edit, it’s because I had some funky coding issues as well – nothing was modified.)
Plus the foot-stamping and “See, this is why you can’t get dates!”. :rolleyes:
And I’m sure Christ appreciates it. 
Well put.
Tracy, I posted in the thread you made about the guy you invited into your house that you felt was stalking you… I was the one with the ‘‘stalker’’ husband who turned out to be doing nothing more than pinging my insecurities. I can wholly relate to feeling like people (specifically, men) have violated your boundaries, but you seem to violate the boundaries that you yourself establish. You invited a man into your house, and perceived him as crossing a line with you. The situation appears the same here. You invited conversation about your shirt, someone made an encouraging (and not at all lecherous) comment refering to your previous comment, and you feel put upon. It doesn’t make sense. I’m completely randomly guessing it’s coming from a place of vulnerability within you, but the thoughts you are having are not rational. Not everyone is looking to make a victim out of you. In this case you are clearly making a victim out of yourself.
This makes no sense to me. Why would you do that?
Very, very funny.
It wasn’t a thread about her boobs, though. It started with her comment about them in a thread about getting a stain out of her shirt, and given what she said there, it wasn’t a surprise some people made jokes. Okay, no big deal there, but she didn’t like it and asked people to stop. Then it came up again in a thread about “women and signals,” and then today someone else brought it up in a thread about her interest in her coworker. Not hard to see where Tracy Lord finds this tiresome, is it?
I think Manda JO got it in one: this is a familiarity thing. Most people here seem to default immediately to the closest level of familiarity with other posters, and for a lot of people it’s no problem, but not everybody works that way. (And let’s be honest - “Cite?” for breast pictures kinda lost its humor value a while back.)
Tracy Lord is assuming the worst where some people are kidding and could lighten up about that; ignoring without accusing of sexism is also a good option. By the same token people could actually stop with the jokes, knowing what she thinks about it.
First, I’d ask for a definition of “sexism” before determining if it is ever okay.
Is “sexism” the same to you, to me, to my Aunt Maude & Uncle Henry? Is it perceived the same across differing ages and genders in different cities or states or countries or continents on an international message board?
And would a person take a comment about their favorite white shirt the same way if made by me as they would if it made by a magazine’s dreamy new hire? And couldn’t, in describing a guy as “dreamy,” be considered as sexist by some?
Should a subeditor, being trained in the art of nuance, subtlety, clarity and word usage, be held to the same standards as a poster on a public message board?
Interesting thoughts and questions you raise TL, this requires another beer as I ponder them.
Will the thread asplode if we ask for pics of DiosaBellissima big ol’ rack? In return I will post a picture of me in pants which lift and separate my enormous man berries.
I said it in the other thread and I’ve said it here–from my POV as an outsider it’s about annoying you, not about being sexist. Use the damn ignore feature if it bothers you on the whole three people out of thousands who’ve actually mentioned it and get on with your life and/or over yourself already.
I was just giving advice on how to make it stop in the MPSIMS thread, but now that we’re in the pit,
This is absolutely right. Sexism has fuck-all to do with it–I will bet you any amount of money that if I mentioned a particular pair of jeans made my ass look smokin’ I’d get at least one or two women asking, flirtatiously, for photographic evidence.
Have you seriously been here since 2004 and missed the entire culture’s methods and typical ways of handling potentially sexy/flirty comments?
Oh, and if you think I’m being sexist, please tell my wife so she can laugh in your face.
Consider your Man Card suspended for this metaphor.
You know what I like?
Boobs.
Online sexism is really interesting, and pretty apparent even on the ever-enlightened Dope. Part of it is anonymity (at least until you ‘out’ yourself as female), part of it may be generational, and part of it may be due to misunderstanding people’s tone (there’s no smiley for ‘I’m not being sexist, I’m mocking people who would actually be sexist in this situation’).
Just searching for the word ‘feminism’ on these boards can be pretty depressing. Spending a few minutes on most other boards (for example, anything to do with videogames) is 100 times worse, if you’re a teenage girl or woman. A lot of it is just people working from the default assumption that everyone is male ‘til they prove otherwise, which is pretty much cemented into our language. You get a lot of ‘Oh, you’re a girl? You write like a dude!’ as if you should gender your username to warn everyone. Oh wait, you did. It sounds like a porn star’s name so, what’s wrong with havin’ a laugh, right?
You might be interested in this piece on Blogging While Female (and just Goggling that comes up with a few great discussions, too).
MAN BERRIES! MAN BERRIES! MAN BERRIES! MAN BERRIES!
runs naked through the thread, man berries slung over his shoulder like a continental soldier
The thread title is wrong. This thread isn’t about sexism, its about lack of sense of humor, over sensitivity to non-issues, MAYBE jokes in poor taste, etc. Sexism has nothing to do with it.
Probably the biggest issue a lot of us have is the confusion between Tracy’s perception of this as a sexism thing and most of the rest of the respondents perception of it as either a flirting thing or a pushing-someone’s-buttons thing.
Let’s be honest–the depends entirely on who one is responding to and whether they perceive it as a flirty snappy comeback or as some sort of sexist man-pig thing.
Some people enjoy poking fun at sensitive people to watch them overreact.
Some people enjoy poking fun back and forth with their friends to watch them humorously overreact. Hell, I have a good [female] friend I’ve known for over a decade and one of our methods of interacting is making increasingly sexually improbable comments about each other’s favorite fictional characters until one or both of us are both weirded out and laughing so hard we can’t talk. (one of our other shared interests is in the humor of impossibly bad slash fanfiction :p)