Also having friends that work in the tourism industry I am sometimes regaled with harrowing tales of stupidity. It seems that some people don’t react well to the combination of heat and booze.
The US embassy here is usually quite helpful although most of our passport & visa issues are handled by the company travel department. The one thing that is done here by the embassy staff is providing a certified copy of passport and visa. This is just a single page that shows the first page of the passport and a copy of the visa that is used for ID in the country. This comes in handy when I have to send our passports out for servicing.
If the US government decides that a country has become unsafe for Americans, they can also take care of getting all of the American citizens out of the country. One of my friends was in Cairo during the recent unrest there, and the US embassy chartered a plane to get him and a bunch of other American citizens out of Egypt after commercial flights had been shut down.
An embassy usually keeps a small quantity of coffins in the supply warehouse for just this purpose. I think we had three at the embassy in Bamako.
I didn’t find the British Embassy in Paris very helpful either. I guess a stolen passport at the weekend isn’t high on their priority list, but it was very odd that there was no help available at all, even advice on other places to go, like a homeless shelter maybe (twenty years ago - no internet; I was 18 and all my money had also been stolen; I had to sleep on the streets). It also didn’t help that the man on the intercom didn’t speak English and threatened to call the police because I buzzed twice.
Arseholes seeking help they don’t merit would explain some bad reputation, but arseholes who refuse to help at all would be another reason.
I do admit to being a little annoyed with their notary service, as it’s sort of a scam. For a fee, American Services at the US Embassy here will notarize stuff for you. I think I’ve had to use the service twice – once when I got married and then the first time I applied for a Thai driver’s license. I had to verify that I did not already have a wife squirreled away back home somewhere, or anywhere else for that matter, for the first one and verify my address for the second one. (I think that was for my driver’s license. I know I had to verify my address for something.) But they’re not guaranteeing I don’t have a wife or that my address is what I said. They’re merely saying: “We swear that he swore to us that this is the correct information.” Not sure what good that does.
I semi-endorse this post, which is to say that I agree with it, at the same time I don’t want to be too harsh with respect to embassy notary services. One model for the efficient delivery of public services is to (semi) privatize some of them: in other words, make people pay for the services they need, don’t subsidize them. So when folks like me or Siam Sam need notary services that will be recognized in the US, we pay insane rates (and spend stupid amounts of time, at least in Jakarta) to get them. Meanwhile, Joe Taxpayer back in Chatanooga does not have to subsidize my need for notary services, just because I happened to live abroad when I became executor of my mother’s estate.
I saw the post by SciFiSam above SiamSam’s and thought why is SiamSam’s requesting assistance from the British embassy? No wonder they told him to fuck off (or whatever the French equivalent is) 
The American embassy no longer certifies US licenses for the purpose of obtaining a Dominican one. Americans have to go through the process as if they had just learned how to drive, including taking the tests (in Spanish!). At least it was like that last time I checked 4 years ago.
I’m not sure of the exact rules in Thailand anymore, because they’ve changed over the years. I initially had to take only a color-blindness test since I already had a US license, from Hawaii. But I didn’t have to verify my Hawaii license was real, just my Thai address. Then I took the color-blindness test every year when I renewed. But these days the license is renewed every five years, and I have to go through these reflex tests and watch an hour-long video on traffic safety that’s really just a Thai soap opera.
I don’t remember if every foreigner has to notarize his single status before they can marry a Thai or if it was just because my wife is a government official. There are extra hoops to jump through when you marry one of those such as asking formal permission from the Thai Foreign Ministry to marry her. That may have been where the notarization came in, but that was decades ago and it’s a bit foggy now. (As a government official, she’s under special restrictions too that other Thai citizens are not. For example, if she leaves the country even on a pleasure trip with her personal passport and not a business trip with her official passport, she must ask the government’s permission beforehand to do so.)
Did the Thai Foreign Ministry sit you down, give you a man-to-[del]man[/del] -government ministry talk, let you know that if you ever make her unhappy, the Thai Foreign Ministry will find you and beat the crap out of you, that sort of thing?
I found that people at the pretend embassy here in Taiwan (no official relationships between the counties, so it’s the American Institute in Taiwan) are much more relaxed and laid back compared to Japan, where there were 18 zillion people running around.
When we brought in Beta-chan for her passport renewal, the officer was really nice and said what cute pictures we had. (You have to bring a series of pictures showing them grow up so they know you aren’t pulling a fast one on the United States.)
The ones in Japan were we registered the births were more matter of fact.
Both Japan and Taiwan have a family registry system (which the former implemented in the later during the colonial rule) which includes the marital status. When foreigners marry citizens then need a form certified by their embassy that the person is single. As the US doesn’t have a similar system then we write up a letter saying that we are single and have the embassy stamp it. Their stamp says that the applicant says they are single.
When we moved here to Taiwan and applied for a spouse visa for me, the Taiwanese government wanted proof that I was married to my wife. We got married in Japan, so a copy of our Japanese marriage registration should be fine, right? On no. They wanted something from the US Embassy since I’m American.
So, I get a copy of the Japanese marriage registration, translate it into English as per the set procedure, and take it to the US Embassy. They stamp it and say that I swore it was a correct translation. We then go the the fake Taiwanese embassy with the stamped translation and original and they stamp everything saying the the US embassy had stamped it.
OK, so does that make it are more true now? (Note that this rant is more about the Japanese and Taiwanese systems than the embassy.)
No, but that was heavily implied.
See, what you really need is a ministry of Foreign Affairs. :D)
Which actually is the full name of Thailand’s.
Coming in a bit late – I feel that you received atrocious treatment there. A temptation felt, to wonder whether – with Paris’s notoriety for being inhabited by some of the rudest and nastiest people on the planet – other countries’ embassies tend to reflect that trait of the city…?
I am British, also: my only attempt at seeking assistance from an embassy of my country; was, while much less dire than yours, not a very happy one. Thirty years ago, a friend and I had plans for touring Poland together, as independent tourists: logistical factors caused us to schedule rendezvous-ing actually in Warsaw. Mishaps and errors on his part, resulted in this rendezvous failing to happen. When it became obvious to him that our meeting-up plan had fallen through, he telephoned the British Embassy in Warsaw, described the situation and his further plans, and requested for that information to be passed on to me if I were to contact the embassy. The person with whom he spoke, politely acknowledged what he was saying, and implied that the embassy staff would do as he requested.
It occurred to me that my friend might contact the embassy; so I called in there in person – this was a couple of days later, at the first opportunity which I had of doing so. I was assigned there to speak with a staff member, whose general demeanour felt to me, snotty-bordering-on-hostile. She gave no indication of any concern over our plight; essentially just told me (without taking any action to check whether there might have been some communication from my friend) was that she was unaware of the embassy having had any sort of message from any associate of mine. For whatever precise reason, the message that he had left with them, thus failed to be relayed to me – I was left in ignorance about what might have happened to him.
A number of PPs have advanced the opinion that embassies in foreign countries exist for more serious purposes, than helping idiot compatriots out of the daft scrapes they have got themselves into. I’d be prepared to accept the foregoing, as being a fair description of my and my friend’s problem (for sure, a less acute emergency than having one’s passport and all one’s money stolen). However, if that was the way in which the embassy regarded our situation – rather than formal (just about) civility without, it would appear, any interest in actually helping us – I for one, would have preferred direct honesty: “We aren’t here to get embroiled with trivial, foolish stuff like this which you’re drivelling on about – get knotted !”
That is not my experience.
The Consular section of the US Embassy can – and will – be very helpful to Americans in distress overseas. If you’re arrested, we visit you in prison. We can’t break you out but we will help you find a lawyer and make sure you’re being treated fairly. We’re legally obligated to visit AMCIT prisoners on a set schedule, no matter how heinous the crime. I visited a man who dismembered three people and one who decapitated his girlfriend. Fun times! When Americans die overseas, we notify the family and help repatriate the body and personal effects. If you’re destitute, we help you find shelter and food and can even help get you home. We do welfare and whereabouts searches for “missing” Americans. In cases of war or civil unrest, we’ll evacuate you home. If you’re taken seriously ill, we’ll help get your family into the country to be with you and even visit you in the hospital. I once spent all night trying to get a wife into the UK without a passport as her husband had been stricken with meningitis and wasn’t expected to live. It’s an emotionally grueling, 24/7 job and pretty much thankless.
I can imagine a consulate representative’s speech, probably given to someone behind bars, after they have just been on the receiving end of 15 straight minutes (without the tourist taking a single breath) of a verbal barrage of ‘story of woe’.
"So, let me get this straight: You acted like an Entitled Idiot shopping at Tiffany’s, you splashed your drink on your waiter, the restaurant staff, and the manager and then refused to pay your bill. The police were called after you slapped… "
flips papers on the clip-board
“… either waiter or the manager… along with the manager’s wife…and all this is over Ketchup!?”
looks at the attitudinal tourist, who is suddenly looking at their feet
“Tisk. Tisk. Tisk. You know, Y’all could saved five thousand dollars & have been a Dumb Ass at Home. And now you think I’m going to wave some magic wand and get you out of here?
I’ll tell you what. I’ll get you a phone and you call your mother. Because you are Not going to be home for Christmas…” 
Best username/post combo ever. 
Look, guys, embassy staff are civil servants. When was the last time you got great service from the Social Security Administration? The drivers’ license authority? Hell, think about all the crap going on at the VA right now. It’s not because the people there are assholes. It’s because they have 9,000 pages of policies governing every conceivable situation, which change every 10 minutes to suit the whims of their political masters. I expect it’s especially bad for consular staff because nobody expects the DMV clerk to get them out of jail.
Okay, some of them are assholes.
[QUOTE=CairoCarol]
One thing I’ve always found peculiar is how little the Embassy assists in terms of helping Americans abroad to vote. For voter registration, absentee ballots, etc., you are generally better off working with either Democrats Abroad or Republicans Abroad.
[/QUOTE]
It’s not really that peculiar. It’s a function of the fact that elections in the US are handled at the state level; consular staff represent the feds. I expect they’d have trouble helping you with a local tax issue or chartering a corporation, too.
I’m sure there are times when the job is tough. But a lot of people have “emotionally grueling” jobs and I find it hard to believe that the Embassy makes its employees work round the clock without a single break. My understanding is that the “on-call” is shared - everybody takes a turn. If you happen to be on duty when an American commits suicide, you are in for a rough time of it. But that is a relatively rare occurrence. It’s not accurate to suggest that the job of a consular official involves 24/7 social work of the most emotionally stressing kind, day after day.
Also, while it is true AFAIK that the Embassy will help repatriate you if you are truly destitute, the citizen must pay for it - there is no charity, it is a loan at best. I’m not saying it shouldn’t be a loan (it should be), merely that you have not presented the full story.
Sorry to be so challenging about your statement - as a long-time American abroad, I really do appreciate all the help I’ve gotten over the years from Consular staff. Sometimes they’ve been absolutely wonderful. However, in my observation people working at low-level consular jobs tend to be treated like shit, and shit flows downhill. I have cringed with embarrassment on many occasions in the consular section because of the snotty behavior of consular staff, not so much toward Americans, but toward host country nationals. I’ve seen people treated with incredible disrespect, and it is not just me. Here in Indonesia, the US consulate service has in the past had a dreadful reputation.
To be fair, things have recently improved markedly. I haven’t heard a single rude comment the last couple of times I had to visit the consular office, and in fact everyone was considerate and cheerful. I wonder if there has been a push back in Washington to correct the situation?