When was the last time you cried?

There’s a great German expression “zu nah am Wasser gebaut haben” which literally means" to have built too close to water", it figuratively means that someone breaks into tears at every occasion. I’m not one of these people, I rarely cry even in desperate and depressed situations, but I’m also not one of the typical males who got told in his youth that it was unmanly to cry and it caught on, I’ve always thought that this is bullshit. It happens rarely, but I can be moved to tears by music, movies or books. The latest occasion I remember was when I made this post a year ago:

I really don’t want to make this a depressing thread, and I think that crying often is a liberating and therapeutic thing, so what was your last time, out of joy or grief?

The last time I cried was the week my husband died.

Since then I have been sad or grieving or angry, but I have not cried.

Exactly 8 years ago this month.

I cry a lot, in the sense of being moved to tears. The last time I cried was yesterday evening, watching this old flash mob.

A few days ago when I learned about the death of Phil Lesh.

This. I teared up multiple times watching the movie about Christopher Reeve. It’s very sad.

Today, watching an IG video.

I’m very sentimental and moved to tears quite easily. Facebook videos of children or adults being surprised with a puppy or a kitten will make me tear up. I watched one earlier today that tugged at my heart enough to open the flood gates. It’s just who I am.

Events like that aside, the last time I had a serious cry was after the death of my father, and that was several years ago. I had been carrying the load for weeks and something happened that set me off. It was very therapeutic, and when I finally got it out of me I was able to move on.

I’ve cried at the passing of several beloved pets. When a pet has been part of your life for the better part of two decades, how can you not mourn their passing?

The last time that I can remember was this past April, when I got some bad health news; that led to several days of intermittent crying.

Oh yes, this. I’m lucky to have all my closest family, parents and siblings, still around, but I lost my grandparents and many of my uncles and aunts, but I never cried. But among the pets I had, a rabbit called Aljoscha stood out, we had a special relationship and loved it each other. When he had a terminal eye infection and had to be euthanized, I held him in my hands. And when I sat down in my car at the clinic parking lot afterwards, I had to cry for several minutes.

Today. My youngest twin passed away almost 2 years in a household accident. She was such a happy bunny, and very much on the autism spectrum with special needs. She went to a 6-12 grade school that was simply wonderful. It was a very happy place where she was part of the DNA and well loved. Her senior year, she started a lunch time garden club. The Principle had applied for a modest amount of funding to the school district to create a garden in an uncovered indoor patio area at the school. Serena passed away in Jan 2022, the garden was converted in May 2022. My neighbor had a nice little metal sign made that said “Serena’s Garden.” My family, teachers and admins, fellow garden club students planted the garden that May, and planted some of Serena’s ashes under some of the plants and put up the sign.

Chatting with colleagues yesterday, one mentioned that tomorrow is Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead). Not something I have ever participated in.

I went by the school today to deliver some fresh living flowers to Serena’s Garden. Damn, I sooooooo miss that girl. I cried.

Tears of joy: Jan.20, 2009, around noon. That might not have been the last time, but it is the one I remember. I couldn’t believe that the US had come to this. But had I know what was to come 8 years later…

I’m in tears now, from reading your story. What a moving tribute that garden is. May Serena’s memory be a blessing to you.

Heh, what time is it?

Columbus Day was the anniversary of the death of one of our dogs and in the afternoon it hit me and I had to go be by myself for a bit.

I’ve experienced bad setbacks and lost people very dear to me but in all my grief I can’t cry. But I will bawl like a baby at a sad song.

The other day I was reading the lyrics to Emmylou Harris’ Red Dirt Girl–not listening to it, just reading the lyrics, though it was playing in my head–and a passing stranger asked me if I was ok.

I’m so sorry for your loss, @China_Guy

This past August, when we had to put our dog down.

Yup. Every dog down is a fountain. I LOVE our current boys, but there’s always a little anticipation of sorrow. My wife got the notice that an old family friend of hers and her parents has metastatic cancer. Tears there for sure. I think I cried when my Mom died in 2017 but it was also such a relief that I can’t remember. I had serious depression after my first life-altering injury/arthritis 5 years ago, and spent many tears.

An hour ago, just massive gratitude for where I am at right now.

When my son was killed in a car accident I didn’t cry right away.

But when the tears came I cried for what seemed like centuries.

All the while realizing that no amount of crying would do anything.

Every now and then I relapse into that grief.

{{{hugs}}}