Where is the outrage over mom 24/7 sex slave

The BBQ Pit
621

[QUOTE=Polerius]
In the case of The Weird One, she enjoys feeling “small and helpless and vulnerable but still completely protected and taken care of”.
<snip>
And if wanting to feel “small and helpless and vulnerable but still completely protected and taken care of” is not regression to childhood, where “daddy” will take care of you, I don’t what is.
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Haven’t you ever felt overwhelmed by life? By all the bills you have to pay and the responsibilities you have to meet? I love being an adult; ever since I was a child, I couldn’t wait to make my own decisions and be responsible for myself. But being a responsible adult takes effort, sometimes a lot of effort, and sometimes it gets tiring. Part of what I love about having a boyfriend - outside of any BDSM context - is knowing that someone’s got my back, that there’s someone who will take care of me when I’m sick and comfort me when I’m upset. I lived by myself for a few years, and I didn’t have a boyfriend for a long time. I know how to take care of myself, I don’t need someone else to take care of me, but it’s nice to have someone there to help, you know?

Well, being submissive is (for me) an extension of that. A chance to let down my protective shield, let go of every worry I carry around about money, work, protecting myself, cleaning house, making dinner, etc. and know that I am safe and loved.

I also want to clarify that I don’t identify as submissive. My boyfriend and I are both switches - that is, we enjoy both dominating and submitting, sadism and masochism (to different degrees). As much as I enjoy being submissive, I also love being dominant, and being that protective, caring force that allows someone to become submissive.

622

[QUOTE=Crocodiles And Boulevards]
You’re equating mental illness with “having characteristics that make a person socially awkward to hang out with.”
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I think if one of my black friends started to behave 24/7 like a real black slave from the South, saying things like “yes massa John”, “please don’t be hitting me massa”, carrying things for white people and generally being very conspicuously subservient to white people, I would consider that beyond simply “socially awkward”.

623

From the original thread

Now that I’m going to call her on this, I’m sure we’ll get some sort of excuse that she didn’t mean it like that, but this is fucked on a really basic level. I can not imagine living in a relationship where I wouldn’t want to tell my partner what I liked because she may stop.

When I do something for my wife which she likes, she lets me know, and I do the same in return.

I just can’t fathom not letting my wife know that what she does gives me pleasure because she then may take it away. That’s too fucked up for me.

624

[QUOTE=The Weird One]
Well, being submissive is (for me) an extension of that. A chance to let down my protective shield, let go of every worry I carry around about money, work, protecting myself, cleaning house, making dinner, etc. and know that I am safe and loved.
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This I get. Wanting to feel safe and protected I get. But the full sentence you used was “small and helpless and vulnerable but still completely protected and taken care of”

Most people, even people who don’t feel small and helpless, want to be safe and taken care of. From your statement, it seems that you go beyond that: in addition, you want to also feel “small and helpless”.

Maybe I am misunderstanding the first part of the sentence, but that is what made me think of someone who is regressing to childhood and wants daddy back in their life to take care of them.

625

TokyoPlayer I meant it exactly how I said it. Most people I know don’t intentionally be nice when they’re angry with someone, unless it’s their boss or a cop. If I’m upset with one of my friends, or family members, I’m not gonna kiss their ass, even subconsciously.

626

[QUOTE=Polerius]
Maybe I am misunderstanding the first part of the sentence, but that is what made me think of someone who is regressing to childhood and wants daddy back in their life to take care of them.
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Other than the issue of the kids, which I am happy to drop per freekalette’s request, this is my biggest concern (as much as you can be concerned about adults on a message board!) As I said before, I think the whole thing sounds regressive and infantilizing. I simply don’t see the connection between having someone tell you what to do and becoming a strong, independent adult.

627

[QUOTE=clairobscur]
I assume you knew before this thread that D/s, SM, etc… existed… If you’re that surprised.. What exactly did you think these kinks were about? You thought that a submissive disliked feeling helpless, disliked humiliation, disliked being taken care of, disliked being used, disliked whatever else you have a problem with? Then, why on earth a person disliking all these things would want to be invoved in D/s at the first place?

That’s a serious question, because at this point, I’m really wondering : What did you think people in D/s, SM, were doing, were feeling, were enjoying? :confused:
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Even within one SM session, it is weird to enjoy humiliation (to get turned on by it, to have an orgasm because you are being humiliated and hurt), but since it is time-limited and limited to the bedroom, we could just toss that under the “sexual kinks” category.

But, to want to feel humiliated on a 24/7 basis, outside the bedroom, in front of friends and family (I assume they kneel in front of their husband when others are around), that is severely disturbed. It has gone outside the confines of a sexual kink, and shows that that is how you want to live your life : humiliated.

What did you think “people thought”?

628

[QUOTE=freekalette]
TokyoPlayer I meant it exactly how I said it. Most people I know don’t intentionally be nice when they’re angry with someone, unless it’s their boss or a cop. If I’m upset with one of my friends, or family members, I’m not gonna kiss their ass, even subconsciously.
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Again, I cannot fathom this. If my wife and I have a disagreement, then we talk about it and get it straightened up. We don’t play games.

If your husband is upset with you, when why would you want to get your head petted without resolving the issue?

629

[QUOTE=TokyoPlayer]
Again, I cannot fathom this. If my wife and I have a disagreement, then we talk about it and get it straightened up. We don’t play games.

If your husband is upset with you, when why would you want to get your head petted without resolving the issue?
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Because resolving the issue involves making an adult decision?

630

Sometimes we can’t discuss things as soon as they happen. If the kids are around, or if I have PMS, we might hold off on the talking about it for awhile, so as not to have an all-out argument. As for wanting to get my head petted, it feels good!! But seriously, it’s a good tangible reminder that I am loved, no matter what. We’re long past the stage of wondering, after a fight, if one of us is going to leave the other, but it still is soothing to have a RIGHT NOW reminder of that.

631

[QUOTE=Antinor01]
What I mean by discussed is that we learned after we got together that we were both into that sort of thing. So we’ve talked about turning it into a 24/7 D/s relationship. At this time I don’t wish to do so because it is a large commitment to make and quite frankly, I’m not sure I’m up to it.
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Antinor01, this post surprised me, because I thought I remembered something else you posted about your relationship a few weeks back. Now that we can search, I found it, in the thread Who has veto power in your house? You posted:
[QUOTE=Antinor01]
we share veto power. I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship that involved one person having the ‘real’ power.
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Do you think these two sentiments are conflicting? If a 24/7 D/s dynamic doesn’t involve one person giving up the “real” power to another, is it just a sex game? I don’t see how you can keep that up 24/7. Or would you consider it a game that extends beyond your sex life?

632

[QUOTE=Eleanor of Aquitaine]
Antinor01, this post surprised me, because I thought I remembered something else you posted about your relationship a few weeks back. Now that we can search, I found it, in the thread Who has veto power in your house? You posted:Do you think these two sentiments are conflicting? If a 24/7 D/s dynamic doesn’t involve one person giving up the “real” power to another, is it just a sex game? I don’t see how you can keep that up 24/7. Or would you consider it a game that extends beyond your sex life?
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The possiblity of that being a conflict was also a part of the conversation and thought process. There is also the issue that I haven’t fully sorted out in my mind what a 24/7 D/s relationship would look like for us. (I may not be explaining myself very well here, there are a lot of complicated issues involved)

While a lot of power is given up by the sub, they still hold veto power. (in a sane D/s relationship that is) Like if I wanted to pick up and move us to another state, even in a 24/7 D/s dynamic I would not make that decision alone.

Does that make sense at all?

633

[QUOTE=Polerius]
This I get. Wanting to feel safe and protected I get. But the full sentence you used was “small and helpless and vulnerable but still completely protected and taken care of”

Most people, even people who don’t feel small and helpless, want to be safe and taken care of. From your statement, it seems that you go beyond that: in addition, you want to also feel “small and helpless”.

Maybe I am misunderstanding the first part of the sentence, but that is what made me think of someone who is regressing to childhood and wants daddy back in their life to take care of them.
[/QUOTE]

Let me see if I can clarify. I feel like a mature, responsible, competent person who’s doing a pretty good job of being an adult. That’s the “me” I present to everybody, and the one I use most of the time. I also have a little “me” that’s worried that I won’t be able to keep up with the bills, my boyfriend will break up with me, I’ll lose my low-paying (but wonderful) job, or otherwise be overwhelmed by this great big world that doesn’t give a damn about tiny little me. When that “me” starts to get too big, I arrange with my boyfriend to do a D/s scene in which I’m submissive to him, and I let my vulnerable “me” out. When we’re done, I feel better and more comfortable reassuming my adult responsibilities.

To take another tack, you say that “Wanting to feel safe and protected I get.” Doesn’t that necessarily mean that there’s something to feel safe and protected from?

I wonder if some of the confusion here is arising from the different ways that freekalette and I approach our submission. I don’t often enact scenes where I’m submissive. When I’m in a submissive or dominant role, it’s like slipping on a different personality. When I put on my dominant role, for instance, I can give orders and dole out punishment with a self-confidence that my normally nice, democratic self can’t.

For the record, I’m not comfortable with age-regression play, and I would never call my boyfriend “daddy” or want him to call me “mommy.” I don’t object to that kind of play, but it’s not for me.

634

[QUOTE=Guinastasia]
Yep, here’s almost the exact same collar she was wearing in the picture she linked to.
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It’s significant that that’s a music/lifestyle site rather than a kink site. Try finding a head harness ballgag anywhere but a kink site. THAT would be your dead giveaway. The spiked collar is just a fashion accessory nowadays.

635

[QUOTE=freekalette]
I know, I know, you can only see what I show you. But you guys are some seriously bright fucking people here, and I’d think you could at least figure out that we don’t spend every second of every day dreaming up new ways to play together.
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They’re not so bright that they can figure out what they don’t WANT to figure out.

636

[QUOTE=Martin Hyde]
No one asked you to come to this forum and attention whore. If you want to be left alone, you probably should start by not coming here in a clear bid to get attention.

You’ve gotten the attention, tough shit if it isn’t exactly the type of attention you wanted when you first posted your thread in the other subforum.
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Look who’s talking. I totally wrecked your grandma/grandpa analogy with cites and everything and all you have to respond with is dead silence. You’re a forum creampuff, dude.

637

[QUOTE=HazelNutCoffee]
But fucked-up kids come out of perfectly “normal” households as well. My main point is that I don’t consider their household any more fucked-up than numerous other households out there, even if it doesn’t conform to what people consider the norm. My secondary point is that it’s difficult to predict how kids are going to turn out anyway, so getting our panties in a twist about the future of these children seems unnecessary. People in this thread seem absolutely convinced that these kids are going to grow up inevitably fucked-up. I agree that their unconventional household might raise parenting concerns that other households might not have to deal with, but I disagree that their kids are already doomed, which is what a lot of people seem to be ranting about.
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Good point. Charles Marston, the creator of Wonder Woman comics, lived with two women and had children by both, and bondage and dominance was CLEARLY part of their lifestyle: one of the women was NEVER seen without her collar and heavy metal wrist “bracelets” on. Yet by all accounts, it was a very loving household and the kids weren’t fucked up by it.

638

Bah, comic writers are all fucked up whackjobs. I mean, have you even SEEN what Alan Moore looks like? There’s no WAY he’s right in the head.

639

Captor, that’s a very good point. I know more about Wonder Woman than any sane person alive should, and I’m very aware of the classic ‘loving bondage’ part. I never bothered to look up old Marston’s children and how they did.

Dude was totally whack, though.

640

[QUOTE=Evil Captor]
It’s significant that that’s a music/lifestyle site rather than a kink site. Try finding a head harness ballgag anywhere but a kink site. THAT would be your dead giveaway. The spiked collar is just a fashion accessory nowadays.
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What the fuck is your point?