Joan Rivers wants to know:
I have on a Banana Republic shirt, Ralph Lauren Polo slacks, Rockport shoes, and Jockey underwear.
I’m very J. Peterman and Lands’ End. LOVE Lands’ End cotton sweaters, have three drawersful. And I was heartbroken when J. Peterman went out of business! I have lots of their wool suits, and c1912 skirts.
SO nice seeing you again, Joan—so, when is Melissa’s first face-lift scheduled for?
Safari for men by Ralph Lauren.
Arrid Extra Dry.
Aveda Hair gell.
Eddie Bower underwear and socks.
Perry Ellis shirt and tie.
Slates Slacks.
Mont Blanc pen.
Tag Heuer watch.
My wedding band.
Motorola Pager.
More than you wanted to know?..
Khaki pants by Eddie Bauer
Olive & Tan shirt by American Eagle
Undershirt by Fruit of the Loom
Socks & Boxer Shorts by Old Navy
Shoes by Doctor Marten
Roots&Radicals,
-ldiot8oy
JerkWaterJive
…Ska and Punk never tasted so good together!
Espirit t shirt (old ratty thing)
stretch pants of some unknown brand
no bra
zebra silk undies, brand unknown
stark white socks, again, unknown brand
Gosh, people are being specific! Ok—
Pink Lands’ End cardigan
Gray J. Peterman wool skirt
Black Bandolino pumps
As far as my “delicates,” well, I’ll leave that up to your imagination.
uh…faded Atlanta Braves jersey, by Starter
old pair of desert camoflauge BDU pants from the l’Oncle Sam label
Well worn and lovable Sperry Top Siders
No skivvies today, sometimes ya gotta say “Whooo hoooo!!”
…send lawyers, guns, and money…
Warren ZevonOh, by the way, I was a bit remiss in leaving this out.
FUCK JOAN RIVERS
…send lawyers, guns, and money…
Warren ZevonLane Bryant no-name purple sweater
Lands’ End Jeans (the perfect jeans)
Nike sneakers
Various unmentionables that I therefore won’t mention 
Catrandom
Chanel No. 5
A girl
Ok…I’ll bite:
Aqua Di’ Gio’ Mens Fragrance by Giorgio Armani
Aqua Di’ Gio’ Antiperspirant by Armani
Scented Hair Gel and Spray Finish by Paul Mitchell
Boxer Briefs by Ralph Lauren
Socks by Ralph Lauren
Golf Shirt by Structure
Slacks by Structure
Dark Leather Loafers and matching belt by Cole Haan
Custom Kinetic Watch by Seiko
Pager by Motorola
Mobile Phone by Sony
Wallet by Gucci
Pocket Change and Bills by United States Goverment 
In my limited experience, I’ve discovered everyone is an idiot until they’ve proven themselves otherwise!
-SS
A couple of women on each arm.
-Neil
From the ground up:
$12 sandals from Payless
anonymous jean shorts
(grey RW panties underneath)
Mindspring badge
large white band collared shirt, long sleeves rolled up
(peach seamless bra under that)
glasses
That’s about it.
Ralph Lauren polo shirt.
Structure pants.
Skechers shoes.
You know, thank God that Joan’s daughter has now gotten into the act. That way, when the irritating old bag drops dead, we can enjoy the mind-numbing fashion experiences for further decades. (I don’t really have any idea how old Joan Rivers is – I mean “old bag” in the generic derogatory sense of the term.)
The Neanderthal bible, AKA Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche, reminds us that real men wear their labels on the inside of their clothing, with the possible exception of the Levi red tag.
OTOH real men don’t even know how to spell kwichee.
Let’s see:
White Lands End Button-Down shirt.
Grey suit from Gorsart (a local Men’s store).
Alden cap-toe shoes.
A blue Geoffrey Beene tie.
Black Gocd Toe socks.
A Hanes T-Shirt.
And I’m at work, so I’m not going to check what brand of boxers I’m wearing.
Geez, don’t I look the NYC lawyer.
Black T-shirt.
Levi’s.
Black socks.
Black combat boots.
Oh, and boxers.
TMR
You will buy the ukulele, and touch every place.
Silk T-shirt by August Silk
Jeans by Gap
Bra by Bali
Undies by Frederick’s of Hollywood
Socks by Bass
Sneakers by Polo
Toenail polish by OPI
A woman needs four animals in her life: A mink in the closet, a Jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bedroom, and an ass to pay for it all.
—Zsa Zsa Gabor
Joan Rivers’ fascination with our wardrobes is starting to worry me…
Let’s see… today, my fabulous beauty and fashion regimen included:
Shower with Ivory soap and baby shampoo
Unscented deodorant. No additional fragrances, hair goop, any of that stuff
New Balance 702’s (10 1/2, EE – no hurtin’ shoes for me if I can help it!)
Generic white sweat socks
Levi’s 501’s (blue)
Generic white undies (briefs)
Beige linen sport shirt I got from the Gap
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
Warner’s on top, Hanes for Her on bottom. Floral-patterned T-shirt from Target. Black jeans, Lee. Socks, probly Hanes. Brown shoes, can’t remember kind. Glasses. Sunscreen. Makeup, probly all gone by now. Wedding ring.
Hey, I like Land’s End too. I LOVE my Squall jacket.