I was watching Nip/Tuck with my dear old mum last week, and she expressed shock and dismay near the end of the episode, when Sean and Julia were explaining the facts of life to their daughter. “Tsk. Tsk. That’s disgusting!” opined the mater. “What?” sez Mudd. “She’s only nine!”
“But she’s going through an early puberty!” “She’s still too young to know.”
I let it drop there, remembering that when she started to give me “the talk,” I had been having regular sex for almost three years, had understood the biology of it for at least eight years, had the required safety instruction in grade eight, had been bringing girls home for years, some of which spent the night, and had slept with several adult women in my folks’ social group. And that, at that time, I was nearly the same age that she was when she got married, and that she has said that she went on her honeymoon with absolutely no idea what to expect. And that within two months of her broaching the subject, I’d moved out of the house and into my girlfriend’s place.
And that when she did attempt to impart her wisdom to me, it was in terms so absurdly vague that she’d been uncomfortably tiptoeing around for quite a while before it dawned on my what she was talking about and collapsed into helpess laughter.
Anyway, it occurred to me that no-one else’s parents could possibly be that clueless… And then I remembered that everything is relative, and that someone here can probably top that.
So… anyone else’s parents astonishingly naive? (On any topic?)