Please understand, I’m not one of those who think I HAVE to have a man in my life to be COMPLETE.
But dammit, sometimes, well, I get lonely and I read about people having a SO and I start to wish I did too.
Yeah, yeah, Wang-Ka, I was waiting for someone to come sauntering along with one of tbose “oh, you people don’t now what you’re talking about, I used to be just like you till He/She came along” stories.
Trust me, dear, some of us know we are going to remain single, we’re not just being sulky.
Recall the folksy wisdom of Lewis Grizzard, who was married many times: “Next time, instead of getting married, I’m just going to find a woman I don’t like and buy her a house.”
Hmmmm…I haven’t decided yet. I’ve been single for about two years now and I’m quite happy. I’m definitely a commitmentphobe ever since my last serious relationship. I’ve had relationships since then but I have never made them monogamous. Even though they sometimes were, I just didn’t want to make it official.
I suppose I might change my mind if I met the right girl, but I haven’t yet. Well, I have, but circumstances, alas, make it difficult. But at this point in time, I don’t foresee getting married or anything. And I’m quite happy with that right now.
Plus the idea of having to raise children scares the dickens out of me. I can’t even take care of goldfish.
Forced to agree with Eve – I’m 40, and haven’t been on a date in well over a decade. For whatever reason, women just don’t see me in “that way”.
Unfortunately, I do.
I’m 41, wasn’t even looking to get married until I was in my mid 30’s and then the relationship I hoped would last forever, didn’t.
I spend my time at the golf course, the pub, work and the health club.
I’m horrible at opening lines, I’m not good looking, I’m not willing to drop all my sports gear to go to her aunt’s cousin’s third sisters wedding for a weekend and . . . ?
And what else sucks is, I’m not willing to do casual sex. So I’m lonely, celibate and single.
And I don’t want to be any of the above.
Whistlepig
I’m picky, I’m shy, and I’m self-conscious. Not a very good way to get a date, I’m afraid.
I have fairly high standards. I could never marry any woman who’d have me as a husband.
Seriously, I’ve had bad luck with relationships. I doubt that I’ll ever have another one. Besides, I have my “things”. I’m obsessed with flying, motorcycles, cars, reading, cooking, blah blah blah… And my sense of humour is relentless. Who’d put up with that?
Yep.
- Based on the statistics I’ve seen, just due to demographics, I’ve at best a 50% of ever getting married at all - and based on my past, I highly doubt I’ll be one of the 50%.
I am probably picky, but it isn’t as though I’ve ever had to apply the pickiness… I have “must be remotely interested in me” as a deal breaker for dating and relationships, and no one has ever come close to that standard.
Unlike many of you, I feel like I missed a lot having gone through my teens and twenties without ever having had a relationship (hell, a date even), and it pisses me off. I’m not at peace with it, I want(ed) the whole marriage/kids thing and I hate that it’s most likely not going to happen. I also hate that I’ll probably resent it until I die alone, finally.
Me.
I’m 40.
I was raised in a house where family is everything.
Therefore, a man with no family of his own is…?
When I die, I’ll leave nothing behind me to show I ever existed. 
Me, me, me!
I’m 36, single and probably will never marry. It’s not that I have any great fear or aversion to marriage (at least none I can think of). It’s not that I don’t date (I do). It’s not that I haven’t dated wonderful men (I have). And it’s certainly not that I fear or don’t like monogamy (I’ve been in long term relationships and always been faithful and prefered it that way).
For some reason, there’s never been a man that I think I’d be happier being married to than I am being single and on my own. I like being independent. Very few of the women in my family are, and I really enjoy making my own way in the world. I like that I can make financial and other important decisions based on how they affect me and not have to worry about the effect on someone else.
If I want to spend my money on my hobbies and travel and save by driving an older car, living in a smaller house, and having older, second hand furniture, it’s 100% my decision. If I want to take an exciting job that has crazy hours, again, my decision. Conversely, if I want to take a job that pays less but offers me more time to pursue my interests, my decision alone.
Also, at 36, I’ve sort of established my routine and I’m getting a bit inflexible. My time at home is mine to do as I chose. The house is how I want it. My schedule is mine alone.
I really don’t want to give that up. I guess you could call me selfish, but as long as I’m single, no one is being hurt by it.
I’m starting to think that way. I’ve had one relationship (about three months, but I couldn’t get much going, but that’s another story ). Right now it’s looking like it’ll be a long time single. I bloody well hope not, but who knows what the future holds.
I’m not shy, I’m a just a nerd. Girls don’t seem to like nerds. At least not the good looking ones 
And as noted by others, I have some rather odd pecularities and hobbies; I have no intention of giving them up for anybody. I put my own happiness before anyone else’s.
Trigonal Planar: Hey, this girl likes nerds. Hell, I befriended every nerd there was in my high school.
Still…I must register myself here as another Eve-Ite.
I’ve never dated, and I don’t think I ever will. I can’t see myself spending time and energy trying to accomodate some man who’ll just dump me in the end. I don’t need a man to have kids (technically I do, but I never have to meet him) so to hell with relationships.
Hells bells, Viva!
If i wasn’t actively trying to ruin K’s life by dating her, I’d fly out to the next So Cal Dope Fest just to meet you.
So would a couple of others, I’m sure.
I’m sorry i don’t really know all the rest of y’all that well, but i would wager that someone on this board has found you interesting, intriguing, nice, exciting, etc… by your posts alone.
Imagine taking that amazing person off the net and into real life situations.
More Dope Fests, y’all. We don’t need to meet new people, just each other.
Hm. Sounds just like me.
Plus I have a perfectly good, healthy sense of self-esteem until the moment I think about dating, then it all goes to hell.
(29)
I had also “made peace” with the fact that I was going to be single all my life. It wasn’t a huge issue with me, I was content with my circle of friends and family to keep me company the rest of my life.
I was in no way, shape or form looking for someone to spend my life with.
Then, you guessed it…I met him. In the middle of nowheresville (Texarkana, AR to be specific!)
I can’t emphasize enough how much I really believed I would NEVER meet someone I wanted to spend my life with, let alone have someone feel the same way about me. It amazes me sometimes the path we both took to each other. I was 34 when I met him.
So, for those of you that have “given up”, don’t be surprised if the love of your life comes walking around the corner when you least expect it.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm…wheels turning inside head…may have to revise plans…still working hamsters…
Very interesting responses on this thread!
It seems that there are many Dopers who wouldn’t mind being in a relationship, but do not believe that anyone would tolerate them being themselves, and aren’t willing to conform. A very admirable quality. I’ve heard the definition of intimacy is the ability to accept someone for the way they are and like them because of that, and vice versa.
I think its rather alarming that some people know that they are going to be single for the rest of their life. I mean, barring a past traumatic event/baggage, you never know what the future holds. I don’t think I will find someone, but I’m not ready to claim that its impossible for it to happen.