Having seen a goodly number of movies, I think we can all agree that a villain is only as good as his underlings. That being the case, who would you choose as your henchmen(people)?
I’d have Danny Trejo, Mattias Hues and Temuera Morrison for intimidation, and Michael Parks as the tough second-in-command. And Cotter Smith as the brainy guy, just because I think he looks smart.
The munchkins from the Wizard of Oz to throw the good guys off at first. Follow that with muscle in the form of King Kong and Godzilla brandishing light sabres. Second-in-command would be Kevin Smith because he would actually know how to direct my henchmen/henchmonsters. My Queen and Main Squeeze would be a genetically fused Salma Hayek/Winona Ryder/Mia Sara. No brainy guys for me; I’m the only one allowed to be smart in my organization.
HenchMEN? PFFFT!
I’d assemble any number of beautiful but deadly female sex slaves to form my cadre of global domination.
Well first of all I’d have to find a theme for my villainy and then find several henchmen with nicknames that match the theme and don’t mind wearing the names on their shirts.
They’d need a good sense of balance, too, because the floor will always be tilted.
Luis Guzman. But he’s busy with his sitcom now, so I’ll have to wait until the middle of October (when it gets cancelled) to begin my Plan For World Domination.
Well… that goes without saying. 
But to top it off, I’d go with a young Martin Landau, Crispin Glover (the Thin Man from Charlie’s Angels), a young Richard Kiel (best teamed with Peter Lorre, for effect), and Michael Ironside. That would be one kick-ass team of henchmen.
Well, I would want a bunch of Deep Ones, and maybe a couple Star Spawn for my main attack forces. For my advisors/assasins, I want some Evil Magical Girls.
Darth Maul, Seven of Nine, and a reanimated zombie Shirley Temple would be my hench-persons. They could protect my Harem of Charlotte Church clones.
I’d clone Batman by the regiment, and they’d all be prepared. The world would be under my caped and cowled jackboot! Mwuh ha ha ha ha hA haaa!
Only need one.
Sean Connery.
Oh yeah.
And the scantily-clad yet deadly women.
But that goes without saying, right?
Heather Chandler, Orson from “Mork and Mindy”, Thom Filicia from Queer Eye, The Lansdowne Street Sausage Guy, and that little Go-go Gopher that always said “Hoopie-Doopie!”
I would be an equal opportunity movie villian.
Mace Windu
Ironbar Bassy
Apollo Creed
Martin Riggs
Lee Marvin, Robert Mitchum, James Coburn… hell, nearly anyone who was in either The Wild Bunch, The Magnificent Seven or The Dirty Dozen would do fine. As for the beautiful henchlady(s)… well, any or all of those Charlie’s Angels ladies would do to start.
I guess I’d be a Dr. Bruno Mabuse style criminal mastermind, with lots of underlings working for me without their knowledge through a small group of henchmen/fronts who answer only to me.
I’d want Mad Dog from Hard Boiled; Thunder, Rain and Lightning from Big Trouble In Little China; and the criminal gang from Time And Tide.
And Michael J. Pollard as my groveling underling to heap abuse upon.
I would relax with my handpicked personal harem of newsbunnies from the various cable news networks.
The Baroness for my Femme Fatale (Shego from Disney’s “Kim Possible” would be her understudy)
One (or more) of the Terminators for my overpowered thug(s).
For me “elite troops,” a step above my Minions but a step below my Henchmen, I’d probably just hire a bunch of former-Soviet superhero teams, like the “Rocket Red Brigade,” the “People’s Protectorate,” “Captain Dirticommieratski,” etc. I’d just really get a kick out of the kitsch factor.
I’d have to hold open auditions for my Brooding, sardonic, but utterly loyal Trusted Lieutenant with a ruthless code of honor. In the meantime, I’d just use a second Femme Fatale.
Dr. Wilhelm “Deathshead” Strasse from Return to Caslte Wolfenstein would be my resident Mad Scientist, for the interim, at least. (You can never have too many Übersoldaten fighting for you)
I’d also make sure to hire some bumbling, incompetant henchman, like X-Men’s Blob, who’d nominally get used as comic relief. However, in my case, I’d immediately send him on a genocidal mission that was “rigged” so that the only way to thwart him would be to kill him. I’d time the mission so that the only hero who’d be available for said thwarting is one who is naive, idealistic, and/or otherwise morally opposed to killing. So either way, I’d win…if the hero slays my henchman, they’ll be psychologically scarred for life. And if they chicken out…my mission succeeds, and the hero will be shamed and shunned by the world for refusing to put the safety of others above their own needs.
>:D