Thank you for the dig. It seems that it’s always open season on Southern California.
With regard to the climate, you’re right that it is extremely dry here, especially this year, but in a normal year L.A. might be just the place where such bumbershoots came into vogue, if only because city sidewalks here tend to be less crowded than many other places, meaning the supersize umbrellas pose less of a hazard than they would in, say, NYC. As for why people want to carry them? Well, they’re much better for couples, for one thing. For another, if you wear glasses nothing is more annoying than getting raindrops on your lenses, so you want to prevent that happening any way you can.
Excellent rant. I was going to start one myself last week on exactly the same topic.
I visited New York a couple of weeks ago, and it rained for the first couple of days. The number of selfish fuckwads with those massive umbrellas was unbelievable. Not only that, but the type of person who carries such an umbrella in the city also generally seems to be the type of person who makes no concession to other pedestrians in terms of moving the umbrella away from eye level, etc.
Because on a busy city sidewalk, if the person carrying the umbrella is not considerate enough to watch where he or she is going, you will get whacked in the face even if you do watch where you are going. On a couple of occasions in New York, there was literally nowhere for me to move without getting one in the face. If the owners would lift their canopies above head height, or make an effort to tilt them away from other people’s faces, it might make a difference. In my opinion, however, using those big fuckers on city streets is just selfishness.
It’s easier to defend the big umbrella until you’ve been poked in the eye by one. I frequently had to avoid huge umbrellas at college. It’s like your shopping cart at the grocery store. It’s cumbersome and unwieldy but you can have some courtesy and make way for people.
When I see people with golf umbrellas walking down the street, I have a strong urge to stick out my arms to either side of me (like an airplane) and refuse to allow anyone to pass within three feet of either side of me without my arm making contact with their body. That is, I just want to arbitrarily take up more space.
If you have a giant umbrella, show a little fucking courtesy to the people around you and maneuver your tarp on a stick up and down and side to side to minimize your physical assaults on other people.
I really can’t believe that some people are so aghast that if they go out in the rain, they will get wet. Guess what: if you go out in the summer, you might get hot. In the winter, you might get cold. It’s called Mother Nature. Suck it up a little, you aren’t made out of sugar, and develop some sense of courtesy for your fellow perambulators.
Your distaste for getting your shoes wet is not so important that it gives you license to scrape other people’s heads with your giant umbrella, nor are you so important that others should be compelled to move out of your way when you carry said umbrella down a crowded sidewalk.
Suave, 21st Century businessman on the caliber of a J. Peterman should don one of these. Whatta you know monstro, they appear to keep curly hair just as dry as straight hair.
These’d never catch on here - just more surface area for the wind to catch and pop inside-out. I used to lose at least one regular brolly a season that way - now I wear my black big hooded SCA cloak and wellies. I come up behind people and scare them - must look like a shorter Nazgul, but at least I’m dry!
Would that everyone were so considerate. Actually, I think that’s most of what this is about - umbrellas don’t hurt people - inconsiderate assholes with umbrellas hurt people, although there are enough assholes being inconsiderate with their golf umbrellas to blur the distinction.
Personally, I just hate umbrellas - they hardly ever work anyway - because more often than not, rain will be accompanied by wind, so it comes down at an angle and the umbrella just about keeps the top of your head dry, until it blows inside out.
Hell, any humidity will wreck my hair; umbrellas don’t do shit to help in that respect, and a larger umbrella certainly wouldn’t make a difference over a small one.
To those concerned about shoes - bring your intended pair along and wear an alternate. Presto, problem solved. To get to work I walk several blocks to and from a train station every day of the week, year round, rain, snow, or shine.
Sadly, yes. You haven’t lived until you’ve been shocked out of your reverie by one of the illegal peddlers on the subway in Busan demonstrating one of those giant umbrellas inside the packed car! I’ve wondered how many people have actually lost eyeballs due to that stupid stunt.
I was ranting about this to a friend who suggested that at least sometimes, these gargantuan umbrellas were those lent out by the holder’s office, if they hadn’t brought their own to work.
If true that makes these people not only inconsiderate bastards but corporate cockhandlers too.
Contributory factors to their popularity, IMO, include:
-They’re popular promotional items - they’re given away all over the place.
-They tend to cost about the same as any other umbrella, but they’re bigger and sturdier - there’s psychological pressure to perceive them as getting more for your money in a retail setting, so how can you not buy one?
Dude, the next time you see a drenching rainfall, take a photo of it for me. I’ve forgotten what it looks like. We’ve had a whopping total of 11 inches of rainfall in the last 5 months. Can you say ‘Level II Drought Restriction’? I knew you could.
Unbrella, smhmumbrella. Unless I’m wearing a suit and tie, I’ll just make a run for it. Hell, the humidity being what it is here, no one’s ever completely dry anyway.
Dude, you have no sympathy for poked out eyes, but you want us all to feel bad about your wet feet? That’s some funny shit, there.
There are these amazing things that they make, called rainboots. They keep your feet dry, without causing personal injury or halting foot traffic! Buy some. They also make these water-resistant outer garments, called raincoats. Some of them even come with hoods!!! Truly, it is a magical world we live in. :rolleyes:
