This article, mentioned in this thread, says that silver, like all heavy metals, is toxic to humans. Why are heavy metals toxic? Are all heavy metals toxic?
I’m not sure that gold is toxic to humans.
However, from the Wikipedia page on lead poisoning (but corroborating with my own memory):
I was under the impression that many of the etiologies of heavy metal poisonings are similar to lead’s although I could be mistaken.
Are they similar enough chemically that they all work that way? They’re in different groups on the periodic table, so that seems kind of surprising.
IANAChemist or an expert in poisons, but I think mercury poisoning works differently- is that considered a heavy metal?
You’re right, at least if this(PDF) is to be believed. In some parts it says that the full toxicity path of mercury is incompletely known, while in others is says that it is thought to enter the brain via attaching to (and mimicing) amino acids, but that it can interfere with neurological functions all on its own without mimicing calcium or sodium (page 213.)
Gold compounds are indeed toxic, but they are hard to come by.
Hm. I regularly persuade people to consume heavy metal. I even ‘inject’ it into them.
Guess the heavy metal and guess my job.
Gold salts can be used to treat arthritis.
Not always; I recall a story from the eighties about a minor yuppie fad for gold coated food. They used some sort of technique that basically coated normal food in a thin foil gold layer; I saw pictures. Gold steaks aren’t my style.
As far as I understand it, pure gold in bulk phase is not toxic, and neither are non-ionic gold nanoparticles. There has been some toxicity reported for cationic gold nanoparticles, and certain functionalized gold nanoparticles. Toxicity looks to be a function of particle size - get small enough, and you may get single-particle effects, as well as weird emergent aggregate effects.
It’s incorrect to assert that all heavy metals are equally toxic, or indeed, have the same effects. Some metals metals in pure state have little or no effect, or have an effect only above certain levels, though they may become reactive in various compounds. The problem with heavy metals is that they are not readily purged from the system by normal biological processes and will tend to settle in bone and marrow. Chelation therapy is required to extract heavy metals, which is somewhat hard on the body and is limited in effect for high levels of exposure. And if they contain even a small amount of beta- or particularly alpha-emitting isotopes they can initiate tumorous growth or damage red cell production.
Well known heavy metal toxins which affect the nervous and lymphatic system include arsenic, lead, antimony, and mercury. In addition, many metals are tenatively linked with various cancers or other syndromes, though the causal evidence is often lacking. The famous lawsuit against Pacific Gas & Energy (popularized in the film Erin Brockovich and championed by the woman of the same name) involved cancer clusters and other disabilities allegedly arising from contamination of groundwater with hexavalent chromium. While high levels of the substance are circumstantially linked with cancer (and alleged, but not statisically or causally demonstrated with other syndromes) the measured level of contamination was significantly lower than the threshhold established by the EPA.
Gold (in particular, since people have mentioned it) is generally nonreactive with any solvent at concentrations found in the human body; ditto for platinum, tantalum, and pure, undissolved nickel (though there are several highly toxic nickel compounds). High concentrations of any heavy metal could conceivable interfere with body processes even if the material is nonreactive, but this is not generally a concern for people not working in a chrome-plating factory.
Stranger
Barium??
Radiologist??
I was going to say Proctologist but I didn’t want to be an asshole. 
Adamantium ? Super soldier manufacturer ?
Sabbath, et al. Disk Jockey.
I do seem to recall an episode of House which involved gold poisoning; I think it was this one (spoilers). Of course, relying on prime-time TV for your medical information might not be the best plan.
That, and House is notorious amongst its peers for inventing medical conditions out of whole cloth. 
Piercings? Gold? do I win?
Gold, and you do body piercings.
Nice going Ford. I wasted too much time trying to come up with a proper job title. :smack:
Maybe it’s all the distortion they use on their guitars? Either that or it’s the atrocious hair.
Or niobium!