Without meaning to be in any way bigoted here, I’ve noticed the same thing. Most people from other cultures, even Asians, tend to assimilate pretty well into American “culture” if they’re surrounded by it (i.e. not living and working in an ethnically isolated neighborhood.) There are all of the usual cross-cultural misunderstandings, especially language, but I’ve known Koreans, Indians, Pakistanis, Sri Lankans, Thais, Vietnamese, and dated a Japanese girl, and they all seemed to grasp the basic cultural nuances as well as could be expected; probably far better than I would if I were submerged in their native countries. But a lot (not all) of Chinese seem to lack whatever basics are needed to bridge the gap of experience. It’s not a language problem–I’ve know Chinese that spoke quite fluently and still had problems with basic manners and acceptible behavior, not to mention common sense (like driving, repeatedly, the wrong way down a one way street, or parking in front of a driveway).
Here’s my ignorant speculation, for what it’s worth:
Unlike most other Asian countries, China is developmentally backward. Although it is technically industrialized, the fact is that a lot of the population has grown up in rural areas, and even those that don’t may have grown up in a Third World-esque housing project where indoor plumbing was uncommon and personal choice in clothing, education, reading material, et cetera was limited, even by the standards of a Communist dictatorship. I don’t mean to be insulting or trivalize the situation with the following reference, but…think of “The Beverly Hillbillies” or the Ma & Pa Kettle movies. The humor came out of the complete difference between the what the Clampett’s considered normal (the “concrete pond”, keeping lifestock in the yard, et cetera) and what their neighbors thougth of as appropriate (polo games, water fountains, gourmet food, and so forth.)
People from other Asian nations, such as Japan or Malaysia, not only have had more media exposure to the rest of the world but also have grown up adapting to technology and industry. In Japan, for instance, although expensive it is not unusual to own a car, and you’ve almost certainly ridden in one at some point. In China, unless you were of the more fortunate, um, class (yeah, I know…they don’t have “classes” :rolleyes: ) then you may never have ridden in one. The stereotype of the bad Chinese driver–however justified or not as it may be–could be understood from the fact that most Chinese didn’t spend their childhoods observing their parents and other adults operating a car and therefore are far more intimidated by automobiles and driving on public roads.
Also, consider that from most Asian nations, including poor and overpopulated ones like India, the people who have come over–most of them, at least in my personal experience, being students–are the more adventurous and probably more exposed and encouraged by family, not to mention wealthier (or at least aspiring to greater financial opportunities) than average. The Chinese students that come over here are largely here at the expense of their government, and because of the educational opportunities that they don’t have at home. Many (in my personal, limited experience YMMV) seem to have a greater prejudice than usual against other people and especially Asians, including other cultures that fall within the geographical borders of modern China, so they tend to be more isolationist from the start.
And then, for what this is worth, is the historical xenophobia (and, as of the 19th century, technophobia) of the Chinese. By any reasonable viewing of history, the Industrial Revolution should have occured in China by at least a century prior to when it started in Europe. We’d expect the Chinese to have had a lock on the South Pacific before the Spanish, Portuguese, British, and French to have made their way around The Horn or the tip of South America. Instead, they became isolationist and distrustful of both foriegn trade and technical innovation. The same could be considered true, to some extent, of the Japanese, but they’ve come to adopt wholeheartedly (and perhaps somewhat precipitately), and in many cases improve upon, both the technologies and at least superficial attitudes and interests of the West. Post-WWII, they seemed to determined to become the major economic force on the Pacific Rim and in America, part of which was becoming culturally acceptible. The Chinese, on the other hand, had the Cultural Revolution, which set them back untold decades in science and industry, and made them more culturally isolated.
This is just my guess, but a lot of what seems like odd, irregular, or nonsensical behavior is just the challenges of trying to cope not only with the difference in culture and language but technology and media “connectedness” as well, and from what I’ve read the same issues are being felt between industrialized Hong Kong and mainland China, and to a lesser extent, between the growing urban Chinese population and the traditional rural/agricultural people. Greater industrialization combined with the more experienced and adventurous emigrees from other Asian nations is probably the biggest factor. If there were a significant number of, say, Congolese emegrating into the US you’d probably see something similar.
Stranger
IME, “quiet Chinese restaurant” is an oxymoron.