Oh, ok, I think I know what you’re saying. Well, I would say that what matters to women and men differs. I mean, really, I think that’s all. Women “perform” femininity, and everyone knows it. We all sort of pretend that its natural, but it ain’t. Men “perform” masculinity as well, but the performance is radically different, and focuses more on actions rather than physical characteristics. As a Super Feminist (I have the costume!) I could go into why I think think this is, but let’s not, and just agree it is for now.
So, women are allowed, societally, a great deal of latitude in the way we dress and present ourselves, because this is part of the performance. Push up bras and breast implants are part of this, as is tanning, shaving, makeup, corsets, stockings, heels… it’s all phoney, and it’s all to create an image that man find attractive. In a way, then, it might even be true to say that a man doing these types of things is being mocked for acting out his masculinity in a way reserved for females, and therefore emasculating himself, on a certain level.
I don’t buy the “some outfits look better with an enhanced bust” as an explanation for why society doesn’t make fun of cup-increasing bras.
Of course some outfits look better with an enhanced bust, just as for some men, shirts would look better with a hypothetical peck-enhancing undergarment, and for other men, their slacks would look better with height-increasing elevator shoes.
The look of all these people can be improved by these artificial enhancers of physical features, and yet, the bust-enhancing bra is acceptable but elevator shoes are not (as I’m sure peck-enhancing undergarments for men would be if they existed).
The example DiosaBellissima brought up (padded shoulders on men’s business suits) is another case where an artificial enhancer is considered OK by society.
So, one way to generalize the question in the OP is “Why do cup-increasing bras and padded shoulders in men’s suits get a pass, but elevator shoes don’t? What is the distinguishing feature of artificial enhancers that today’s society marks as OK, versus ones society frowns upon as fake, loserish, laughable?”
Thank you. Further evidence of this (in my opinion) is the way that gay men have more latitude in their social circle to do these types of things. For example, there is such a thing as “push up” underwear for men, but the market isn’t for straight men. I mean, obviously all gay men don’t present themselves like that, but its more acceptable (I think) because that emasculation fear isn’t as prevalent, and because gay men don’t perform masculinity the same way because they are trying to attract other men. The rules are different.
ETA: When I said “emasculation” above i probably should have said something more like feminization=emasculation. What I mean is, there isn’t as much of a stigma for “acting like a girl”
Agreed, but there are limits to this though. I think there was a Benny Hill (a British comedian) skit many years ago where some guy goes home with an attractive woman, and by the time she has finished taking everything off (padded bras, makeup, wig, high heels, fake eyelashes, fake nails, etc) he was left with a very unattractive plain Jane and was not pleased
If our society spent less time mercilessly mocking people for trying to have sex and more time having sex, I think we’d be a lot happier. C’mon, baby, let’s do it like bonobos!
I think the tall shoes on men is a pretty good comparison. A guy wearing shoes that add an inch or so of height might not be doing it necessarily just for that reason. Maybe they are comfy shoes, or a certain style or something, and they just happen to make him look taller. At the same time, a woman wearing a bra that might add a cup size is probably not wearing it for the primary reason being enhancement. That’s just a bonus.
Now a 2+ inch lift on a man would be more akin to an A cup trying to pass off as a C or D, and I think some people would snicker or roll their eyes about either of those.
Yeah, I know. But it seems strange to wonder why society doesn’t do something you yourself aren’t compelled to do. So either you think women with padded bras are losers, which you haven’t said, and which would be a different conversation, or you don’t, in which case I don’t understand why you’d expect anybody else to.
Alternatively, you know what Gandhi said to do in situations like these.
Well this thread has certainly come full circle. If there were an audio recording of me reading this thread it would go like, “Good question… Actually, it was obvious what the OP meant… Yes, you, I agree with you… No you’re missing the point… Good point, other person!” And so on.
In short, I’m with Polerius through and through. Pretty much everything he wrote is what I was thinking, but with less profanity. It’s pretty funny that people here are focusing on the differences between padded and lined bras, and digging up every practical reason they can think of for enhancing ladywear, ignoring the point of the OP by a country mile. The bottom line is there are bras made to make the boobs like larger, rounder and perkier than they actually are sans-bra. A crime? Surely not; but why is this sort of “false advertising” okay for women, but not men, who are run laughing out of town for similar antics?
Anyway, I think miss liz, tr0psn4j and some posters on page one (sorry if I forgot you!) are correct.
Back when I was in high school, we had this class called “Bachelor Survival”, which was basically Home Ec. for guys (hey, it was an easy credit). Said class was taught by this chick in her mid-30s who was unbelievably flat but did wear padded bras on occasion (and yes, we noticed it happened with certain outfits).
Anyway, come Christmas and we all threw in $5 and ordered her a Beauty Bust Development Kit right out of the Sears catalog.
There are plenty of practical reasons - controlling the visibility of the high-beams being one. Comfort under additional undergarments being another, so I’ve been told. Not so many practical reasons for a guy to do something similar.
For those of you who wear lined bras to hide your nipples - It’s not working! I know exactly where they are.
And - I want to get that male “The Bulge” and wear it backwards to work. “Good Lord! Purd has made pickles in his slacks!” “Ha ha, not at all folks, I just have a fake dick on my butt!”
Okay, here’s my answer to the main point, which is valid. Let’s get real - molded bras, non-push-up, do enhance the appearance of your boobs - they don’t make them bigger, but they make them look fuller and much rounder. As well, the vast majority of bras create more cleavage and makes most boobs appear more prominant and perkier than they would unsupported or smushed down in a sports top.
This just one of the many ways men and women are held to very different expectations (in all cultures, but I’m talking about America in particular here because that’s all I know much about). Women are expected to enhance and display their physical beauty and sexuality in various ways and it’s accepted that a lot of artifice goes into presenting ourselves as attractive. Men are often held in contempt if they do the same, or really do ANYTHING commonly associated with what women do.
Compare the famous and exceptionally attractive men and women on your average Hollywood red carpet, it’s a shocking difference. Women are of a very homogenous body weight, much lower than the average, and most work very hard to maintain that, often with little food and lots of exercise. Almost to a woman they have very long, thick, luxuriant hair (much of it fake) either loose for sex appeal or worn up and intricately dressed to look ‘classy’. They don’t have one visible bit of body hair. They are in very fitted and revealing outfits that display the countours of their body and often lots of leg or chest, sky-high heels so they walk in a stilted way and legs look longer and asses more prominent, a full face of obvious-looking makeup to make skin look flawless and draw extra attention to eyes and lips, full-body tan, probably body makeup as well, shapewear under their outfits, boobs padded or pushed-up with expensive bras (or boobie tape), many asses padded as well I’m convinced - and most of them have had a fair amount of plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures to add desired features like full lips and breasts, and take away undesireables like thick noses and thighs. Now, everyone knows these women don’t look like this ‘naturally’, but they are still considered much more sexy and well-groomed than the average woman of a similar weight (by many people, anyway). Most people have a basic understanding of just how much effort goes into all this, it’s socially accepted.
The men are all handomer than your average dude and tend to be on the lean/fit side when it comes to the body, but other than that… they all wear the same sort of nice suit which don’t actually show much about their body, with dress shoes, maybe a bit of unobvious makeup and plastic surgery. They mostly have the same sort of short haircuts, with a few men at around shoulder-length. They are mostly clean-shaven, but some have beards or stubble. If they were outed as doing anything all the female movie stars do, they would be ridiculed for sure. It’s like they’re from a different planet.
A more interesting comparison to me would be why women who get surgery or wear padding to increase the size or enhance the shape of their asses, are held in much more contempt than women who do the same to their boobs.
Further evidence of this (in my opinion) is the way that gay men have more latitude in their social circle to do these types of things. For example, there is such a thing as “push up” underwear for men, but the market isn’t for straight men. I mean, obviously all gay men don’t present themselves like that, but its more acceptable (I think) because that emasculation fear isn’t as prevalent, and because gay men don’t perform masculinity the same way because they are trying to attract other men. The rules are different.
