I’ve got a whole system down that works pretty well. Bring baby wipes, they are indespensible. Get your fingers then your mouth clean, its amazing how much resin can build up on your lips and fingers, especially after a joint. If you can, bring a sweatshirt which you can later remove. Fabreeze is a wonderful product, spray liberally when done. Some strong spray for the car to cover odors, gum, and finally something for the eyes. Visine sucks, go for something desiged to treat allergy red-eye. Of course the hardest part is pulling off normal behavior. After years of practice I have it down pat, I can go just about anywhere and no one would ever know I was stoned.
OK, Bongmaster.
Just don’t become one of Rilchiam’s husband’s co-workers or show up in my lab class!
So, Phlosphr–did he show up in your class yesterday?
Any fan of pizza knows that pizza has at least two “phases”: the hot pizza you eat for dinner tonight, and the cold pizza you eat for breakfast tomorrow. They both have their good qualities, and they both contain the same ingredients, but the taste and texture are so different that they may as well be two entirely different foods.
The same is true of marijuana. The first few times you get high, the effect is completely different (much more intense, in some ways) from the high you get after you’ve been smoking, even just occasionally, for a few months. I won’t say he made the wrong decision–there’s a time and place for drugs, and it’s not at work–but he did make it for the wrong reasons.
Yeah, what is it with those people and their wool pullovers? Potheads are always wearing the same damn wool pullover all the frickin’ time, and it always smells like a Blue Oyster Cult concert when they walk into the room.
Dirty hippies through the ages: ditched the ideals, kept the stank.
You could just teach the class and collect your paycheck instead of worrying about some stoner.
Man, what are you smoking?
I own one wool sweater and I almost never wear it. I’ve actually known few potheads that wore them frequently. The vast majority of potheads I’ve known have dressed like the vast majority of non-potheads I’ve known.
How about fewer bullshit stereotypes and more honest observation? Or is there any to be had? I mean, really, if your opinions on marijuana are this strong, it seems to me that the only folks that would come out of the pot closet to you would be people who are oblivious to their own pot odor and people who either want to piss you off or just plain don’t give a flying fuck what you think.
Personally, I’m a clean, shaven, khaki-and-boring-shirt-wearing pothead who doesn’t give a flying fuck what you think.
Bongmaster: Good tips! Fabreeze is a winner. I had never thought of that. Thanks. And ditto on the regular Visine, in my experience. The allergy stuff rules.
Yeah, it’s just a job, after all right? I mean, you didn’t go through agonizing years of grad school, toadying to senior faculty, slaving to idiot reviewers abitrary demands to get stuff published, clawing your way up the promotion ladder to get tenure (or not), mediocre benefits, and a salary that’s like 50% of what you could have made in the private sector.
Oh, wait…
I don’t know how likely it is on the college level, but this could be a cry for help.
Are you REALLY a philosopher? What is ther correct philosophical term (or psychological term if you please) for that kind of weasel language? Maybe your class is the only one he gets stoned to go to. You really have no idea. Maybe he gets stoned because he’s scared about blowing someting up in the chemistry lab. 
It’s not like he could destroy the building by misapplying his limited psychological knowledge. Judge his work by the same criteria you judge the other students, or admit that you’re too biased to do so.
This reminds me of a high school incident -
My high school had a rather complex system of allocating time-slots, which occasionally caused confusion - particularly when it was disrupted. As the result of a school presentation, the classes for a certain day were rescheduled - which caused the following mess-up: I had just finished smoking a huge joint, in anticipation of a free study period and then the end of the day, when I was told - “you have Calculus today!”. I had totally forgotten that it had been rescheduled.
Well, off I rushed off to class - totally stoned. Our teacher, a sad and stuffy little man, already disliked me intensely because I was in the habit of smoking pot outside his class when his window was open (his class being on the ground floor), secure in the knowledge that he was so short he was unable to look out over the window sill to see me & friends smoking pot, but could hear and smell us.
His petty, pendantic little ways, combined with an absurd sense of his own superiority, simply required this sort of retribution. I draw no parallel with any of the current academic posters, of course! 
Anyhoo, the teach took one look at me & he knew I was stoned. No doubt I smelled, was red-eyed, etc. He knew, and I knew he knew.
His turn for revenge! He could see I was high, and had no books with me & had not done my homework. Plus, Calculus was not my subject - I was never any good at it. So, why not start with some humiliation?
“Aha! Why don’t you go and demonstrate for the class the first calculus problem, please?”
I grabbed my friend’s textbook and walked up to the blackboard - having no idea how to do the problem. Shit.
However, as I stood there, I realized that the first problem was exactly the same as the demonstration problem on the facing page! Only the numbers were different! Of course, the Teacher’s edition had a different layout, so the teacher didn’t know this … and I proceeded, stoned as I was, to complete the problem on the blackboard - perfectly.
The poor fellow just could not believe it. He went over the problem very carefully - but it was right. The rest of the class had clued in to what was going on (and of course, they could see the demonstration problem in their books), and began to snigger.
Score one for the stoners. He ignored me for the rest of the year, and on the standardized tests at the end of the year I managed to pull off a B+.
Malthus, thank you for the amusing story. It would have been good any time, but today it’s gold.
I know - a day of tragedy and loss. 
Thanks for the kind note!