Okay, I have a question. Why do people hate me? I don’t mean people that I know personally and choose to hate me. I don’t like that they do, but I can accept that. In that case, it is because of something I did, or at least something they think I did. But there are people in this world that hate me for who I am or what I am, and I honestly can not understand or accept that. I don’t mean I don’t believe they exit. I know they do. But I want to understand why.
Why do people hate me because I like women and men? Why does it matter to them that I find people of both genders lovable, kind, caring, worthy and yes, even sexy? How does this affect their lives at all? I can’t understand it.
Or why do they hate me because I’m part of, in the grand scheme of things, a tiny religious and ethnic minority. I’m still struggling to find my place in my faith, but people look at me and think I’m Jewish and hate me for it. Why does it matter to them? How does it change their lives?
I’m sure there are other reasons that people hate me as well, because I’m an American, because I’m a woman, because I’m pro-choice, because I’m a feminist … the list goes on, but I guess religion, ethnicity and sexual orientation are the ones that I understand the least.
Could someone explain this to me? I really don’t understand it. Fundamentally, I don’t get why people could hate someone they don’t know. I’m posting this in Great Debates because it seems like the right place to put.
Actually, since you do not appear to have a specific thesis or argument, I would guess that GD is not the best place to put this. You are not actually lambasting anyone, so it does not fit inthe Pit. You do appear to be looking for a discussion rather than simply venting, so I would guess that IMHO might provide a better fit than MPSIMS.
BrainGlutton is correct that someone might have more fun in the Pit. However, if this was perceived by some as just a whiny complaint, it would proabably turn into a jam pile on the OP. Unless gfloyd indicates a desire to rant, I’ll stick with my original assessment.
You come off as a little whiny and having a low sense of self-worth. One would hope that people would be naturally included to see that and help you out. Based on much experience, just the opposite happens. When you can take the blows the least is when people are going to punch you the hardest. DOn
You come off as a little whiny and having a low sense of self-worth. One would hope that people would be naturally inclined to see that and help you out. Based on much experience, just the opposite happens. When you can take the blows the least is when people are going to punch you the hardest. Don’t assume that people “hate” you because of any of your minority statuses. Maybe it is just you (as in how you are reacting to others right now) and the image that you project.
It is not bad for people to hate you. I have been a fairly polarizing figure ever since I was a little child although friends and family have usually been baffled as to why. I suppose it is because my personality is very distinct although I am very quiet. I only care if the people I like and respect like me. I actually get off on the fact that people I look down upon despise me. I get very angry if some Neanderthal thinks that I am great and try to undo that as soon as possible. You don’t have to go to that extreme but realize that most people are not worth bothering with at all. If you build up a core group of people that like and respect you genuinely, that is much more important than have dozens of causal aquaintances think you are cool in a superficial way.
If you’re significantly different from other folks – which means what you eat, how you worship, who you screw, how you look, and such – there’s a good number of people who’ll hate you for it.
Can’t speak for everybody else but I don’t like you for the simple reason that your chances of getting laid are immediately double mine in almost any mixed crowd.
My advice is really composed of four key points. You’ve got to…:
My advice is to toughen up. As long as the reasons that people hate you are wrong… or at least you feel they are wrong (after good consideration on the subject) then you shouldn’t worry about it. People hate people for irrational reasons… and sometimes no reason at all besides the fact they need somebody to hate. The question almost makes you sound like you depend on other people for your own personal self worth. That’s bad. (At least it is if you live in America) Nobody loves anybody anymore for who they are… Mike Tyson might be a really nice person on the inside but that’s not what pay’s Mike bills if you get my meaning. People will always love you for fscked up reasons… period. That’s their problem and not yours… you might want to consider that as the real issue and find a way to help them out instead of worrying about your self image.
I don’t mean to sound whiny and I have plenty of self worth. I’m just curious. I know everyone doesn’t hate me, I just want to understand why some people do.
Sorry to make it sound that way.
If this ends up in the pit, I have no problem. The only other thread I started that got lots of replies ended up there, so oh well.
You’ve got to stand for something or you will fall for anything. The only kind of person that few actively hate are spineless suckups with a personality deficit disorder.
Almost everyone has people that can’t stand or even hates them. There are good reasons and there are bad reasons why that might be. Some people are hated because they molest children. Other people are hated because they are whistleblowers on corruption.
If you do horrible things, you will be hated. If you do great things, you will be hated. The only way out is to be a milquetoast person with no principles that only aims to please whoever comes his way. I think a better way of thinking is to figure out why the people that hate you do so and if that is something that you need to correct based on your own principles.
Hate is a primitive emotion. One that should be tempered. But most people don’t and just reply their emotions for everything. It’s their problem… they can’t deal. Immaturity plain and simple.
If you really don’t want people to hate you… you could always move to a new place where nobody knows you and start over… do your best to “fit in” and hide all your real feelings on the inside. Eassier than you think.
That cracked me up. I made a similar joke here a couple of days ago.
The main problem with relocating and starting over is that you always have a tagalong. The tagalong is you and all your traits. The tend to be very consistent from place to place and elicit roughly the same reaction wherever you go. Believe me, I have all but completely disappeared twice, moving over 2000 miles from everyone I knew and establishing only minimal contact with anyone. Guess what? The fresh start is great until it is not fresh anymore and you pick up right where you left off.
In the past three years I think I’ve dated about three bi-women.
And as I man I can tell ya’. They were SO much fun. Not because of the possibility of a three way. I could care less about that to tell you the truth. But what I thought was great about it was that if we were out somewhere and a hot girl walks by we could BOTH take pause for a moment and say “Dayum!” which works out well for me as I tend to have a wondering eye that has got me into trouble in the past with some of my straight female counter parts.
gfloyd (why am i calling you that?) i know that not everyone hates you. in fact, i know many of the people that don’t and a few people that do, and that is because they are too insecure with themselves, and hate basically everyone but one another. don’t get down because people are small-minded and uppity.
she’s really not all that whiny. the post was just written with a different intent than that with which it came off. trust me, i share a room with her.