Some people, when you say no they hear yes, and when you say yes they hear no. I’ve never been able to figure it out. Something about politeness?
I’ve calmed down some and realize this is a stupid first-world complaint for sure. We have very limited space here, so a chest freezer like we had in Oregon is out of the question. I’ll cut it up and see what I can do. I see a ham and bean soup in the near future. My daughter is coming over tomorrow; perhaps I can foist some off on her.
It’s probably going to depend on the food pantry. I’m the manager of a food pantry and I would have no problem taking a ham still in its original wrapping.
A food kitchen might be even more lenient. We have a volunteer who works for us two days a week and at a food kitchen two days a week. He has taken stuff to the kitchen before that was still good, but violated our guidelines.
Good to know. I got some serious blowback when I suggested it to the wife, so this is going to be one of the many issues not worth getting into a tiff about.
\1. We have an in-law that is always trying to “help” people. E.g., she notices you standing up. She will drag a heavy chair across a large room so you can sit down. Um, I could sit if I wanted to. We keep trying to let her know that she doesn’t have to worry about us. We can get food or whatever when we feel like it. But so far no luck it getting her to back down.
\2. Speaking of food… I don’t eat a lot. I just don’t. So when I eat my usual small portion I get hit with “Here, have some more. You’ll starve to death.” I don’t want it. Definitely don’t want attention drawn to it.
Oftentimes many of the dishes are just not for me. E.g., at a cook out the main “meat” might be hot dogs. Hate them. So I have a bit of potato salad or some such. Then I get hit by multiple people trying to foist food on me that I don’t want. Worse, they ask questions. No, it is none of your business what I choose to eat. I keep pointing out that I’ll be fine. Haven’t starved to death yet.
I don’t understand why people get into all this. I would never think for a second to get into another adult’s eating preferences like this.
This is hardly the first ham to cause trouble.
This can occur, even if it is f^good ham.
Well known Canadian comedy sketch:
My parents try to put me down
Just because fine ham abounds
They are square
The world is round
Gonna throw the dice and change my town
They call me lowbrow and uncouth
But they will taste the ham… of truth!
The above link is the 2 minute version. Here is the full 7 minute sketch.
In addition to running a Food Bank, my wife’s employer also gives employees a big frozen turkey annually. I always cart ours over to the rescue mission, getting – literally – a round of applause from the clients as I walk into the facility slinging around a BFFT.
It feels good – maybe like your niece feels when she does something “really nice” for you.
But I agree: I learned later than I should have that gifts really ought to be about the recipient, not about me.
Ok, that’s maybe double the size of gammon I’d get here. Although I still think it would not represent a challenge.
Okay, so freeze the sausages, and just put the ham in the fridge- hams stay good for a LONG time.
We (the two of us) would love to get that package.
I concur, but hell you can eat it over a month or more if you like.
The Ham does not need to be frozen.
My dad once got me and my brothers each a country ham for Christmas one year - he ordered them from his local watering hole’s food distributor, who also was a regular at the bar. We all joked about it, and how terrible the ham was, because it didn’t arrive with any instructions and none of us knew what to do with a salted ham at the time. Turns out you need to soak those things at least overnight to leach out all of the salt from the curing process. I was pretty strapped at the time, and I got real creative on how to use a 10 pound hunk of salty protein (or in this case, a protein-y salt block).
So to sum up - your wife’s niece is ham-fisted? 
Honeybaked sells 6-10 pound bone-in half hams.
Edited, when I read the site more carefully.
Smaller hams (or half hams) are definitely a thing if you want 'em; but I can imagine being gifted a 20-pound chunk of meat and bone that would be a little unwieldy for two people, unless they’re two 19th century miners in the Sierra Nevadas.
Using 4 oz servings for breakfast or older folks’ dinners, and ignoring the bones, that’s 80 servings. Eaten by 2 people once a week it’ll take 40 weeks ~= 10 months to whittle away.
Not to mention the rest of the cured meats in the OP’s gift haul.
It’s not just a sodium overload; it’s a commitment.
It said “FREEZE ON ARRIVAL.” I didn’t move for 5 minutes!
This. Plenty of reasons to celebrate this time of year but I’m always open to creating a new one as well. Tell people to BYOB and you have everything you need.
I love good ham, but we’re only two people, too. Once or twice I went to a Honeybaked store a day or two after Easter, hoping to find bargains or smaller cuts. Nope, the smallest chunk they had was still way too big for us and cost $30.
If we were gifted a whole ham, a lot would go to waste. I’ve found that ham doesn’t freeze particularly well; it gets spongy and weepy when it thaws out.
The best thing I can come up with is to go to Trader Joe’s around a holiday and get this cut they call “ham” but which looks suspiciously more like pork loin. It’s about two pounds or so and made by a company called Frick’s. It’s not as tasty as Honeybaked but at least we can get through it in two dinners and one breakfast, after which we’re sick of ham for awhile.
For reasons we currently have 3 huge turkeys in our freezer. My plan is to do a thanksgiving-in-(month’s name) every so often.
I wonder if you could donate it to Hamnesty International.