Oh, I’m not really self-conscious about it, I just can’t do it and I have a policy of not engaging in anything that I suck at.
But having said that, I do “happy dances” ALL THE TIME. WEEE! 
Off to IMHO.
DrMatrix - GQ Moderator
I’m male.
I’m white.
I’m straight.
And I can dance pretty darned well. I have taken 8 classes in various types of dance. I have been in dancing troupes.
Yet, why don’t I jump out on the floor and wiggle my booty when at a club or a wedding?
Because I find what most people call dancing pretty stupid looking.
Many couldn’t find a beat with Ray Charles showing them the way.
And when I street dance (what I call the collection of dances that is not taught in most schools), I need room, not 2x2 feet as in a club.
I love to dance. I love to dance with people. But when I’m with people who know I can dance, it gets tiresome to be the “freaky straight white guy that can dance.”
But catch me in a dancing mood and I’ll dance ye olde nighte awaye.
Another straight white guy who doesn’t dance…
I only danced in public once. On a table. I don’t remember it, as I had just ingested a pint and a half of cheap vodka.
Fortunately, someone was kind enough to videotape it. I think I was more graceful puking.
'Nuff said.
Happy Lendervedder…I have to say my husband is the same way! After a few drinks he is an unbelieveably good dancer. It blows me away every time. (Unfortuantely, I’m a better dancer when I’m sober!!)
One more straight white male who just don’t get it. I don’t particularly think it’s stupid, I just don’t see the thrill in it.
Hence, I never learned to do it, reinforcing my complete disinterest, and unwillingness to bother.
I danced at my wedding, and at exactly one, count 'em, one, dance in my high school years. One dance, with a girl I was extremely interested in. A slow dance, where the floor was packed with necking teenagers, all also looking to “get some,” so nobody could move more than one step in any direction, anyway. It was more a mass-shuffling-and-groping event than a dance.
Music? Love it. Can’t get enough. Moving in a semi-rythmic fashion to it? Why? If’n ya wanna rub up against each other to music, put on some background music and hop in the sack. That I’m good at.
Because:
- We’re straight.
- We’re white.
- We’re men.
Seriously though, we don’t like to dance because it doesn’t really feel fun to do it. When I do dance, it’s because that puts me in a position to rub up on a girl and make a move on her. You can’t just go and stick your crotch against her ass any old time now, can you?
For me its a self concious thing- if I was good at dancing I’d love it. But I’m not. My mastery of dancing only extends to the realms of Dance Dance Revolution, offering up such buffoonery as a botched double axle, causing me to slip and bang my head against the rail.
White, straight, single, rythemless, male who likes to dance checking in.
I dance. That is, I will go on the floor and attempt to shake my body to the beat of the music. Nothing fancy mind you, I just kind of bend the knees up and down, twist a little and move the arms in some form of fashion. I will do this sober or under the influence. Although the dancing does get better after a few rounds (or at least it seems that way to me:)).
While I actually do have something not quite entirely unlike a sense of rhythm, I can’t seem to use it on a typical dance floor. It only comes out when I’m playing music, or when I’m doing a form with weapons in hand. I’m sure everyone will agree that neither is terribly conducive to club dancing (although the knives would certainly clear enough room for me to move).
Besides, it looks stupid.
Well, there’s “real” dance, which I can sort of appreciate because it looks nice and there’s skill involved, but I have no interest (or ability) in learning it.
Then there’s the dancing that people do at clubs, which looks stupid and is done to music that I can’t stand. THUMP THUMP THUMP doesn’t move me to bump and grind, it moves me to go over into a corner and start drinking, just to have something to do. The music I like is utterly undanceble anyway.
Slow-dancing, forget it, too clumsy and not moved by slow music.
The only thing I have done that was even close to dancing was basically jumping up and down hard on the loud metal floor of a backwater Chinese club, sort of in time to the song’s beat. And I had to get fairly drunk to even do that.
I’m glad it’s not just me. I’m perfectly content to stand against the wall, sipping a drink and bobbing my head in time to the music while talking to whoever happens to come by me. Assuming, of course, I even go to a club/other dance place, which seldom happens.
Actually, I can dance pretty well, but I don’t find it enjoyable.
I’ve never understood why people assume the reason you don’t dance is because you’re embarrassed. You can’t convince some people otherwise.
Odinoneeye, I don’t dance because I *am[/] embarassed about it! It all goes back to my childhood shame at being singled out, looked at, mocked, and rejected–a thing my body-denying Anglo upbringing didn’t help.
The horrid irony is that I am intensely musical.
Welll, that coding error was oddly appropriate…
I love to dance (real dancing, not the pointless club jumping-around stuff). Trouble is, I suck at it. I just have no rhythm. Odd, because I love music down to my twisted roots. Dancing alone with Pricegal is great; it doesn’t matter if I fuck up, and I can usually feel the rhythm through her, 'cause I can’t get it from the music. Strange, but there you are. Dancing with a lot of people watching is just embarrassing, unless I’ve been drinking a little.
White, straight, male dance instructor checking in 
And I’m not some old guy either! I’m 20, have been teaching for about 4 years and although I do say so myself, I’m a damned good dancer. I do it because I find it to be a great form of self-expression and because I love to perform (also because women seem to love nothing better than a good dancer ;)).
Having said that…
When I’m out in a club just trying to groove to the music, I can’t do it! I feel stupid, I have no idea what I’m doing and just don’t get it. I also have little understanding of how to grab a complete stranger girl and start dancing with her so that takes more of the appeal away. I will always give it a go though, if just for something to do while I’m out.
As far as club dancing goes, if there’s space and a decent beat and I’m feeling up to it, I will start doing my own special form of hip-hop/street/breakdancing which has every single time cleared the floor, got me free drinks and got girls interested in me, so there is something to be said for being a good dancer
I’m a straight, white male and I love dancing. I mean love it! I’ve been told I’m pretty darn good at it too. There’s nothing like totally feeling the music and reacting to it, moving with it and basking in it.
Most clubs I go to, though, are filled with lamers either doing the school-disco-step-from-one-foot-to-the-other dance or just shoving their crotch into some woman’s arse despite the furious look on her face.
I occasionally go to gay clubs because it’s easier to dance there without feeling self-conscious.
There’s definitely a feeling that good dancing is a bit effeminate[sp?] amongst straight white men. All they have to do, though, is remember that how good you are on the dance floor correlates to how good you are in bed
I’m screwed. I’ll never get laid again as long as I live.
Got to agree with a couple of points already raised
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Don’t see the point, and really really hate it when people say try it you’ll love it. I have tried it, I don’t love it I just feel silly. (some people seem to believe that if they like something everybody else MUST)
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As posted by GMRyujin “Even worse is that one white dude who CAN’T dance and is out there getting into it and making an ass out of himself. He’s WHY we don’t dance. We say, “Man, I’m glad I’m not that guy!””
That about sums it up for me
(I’m so well known for not dancing that when I danced at my wedding I had a line of people holding up score cards like they do for the ice skating … 5.5 5.4 5.8 etc )