Why do you love your significant other?

In My Humble Opinion
21

I know that a lot of couples finish each other’s sentences, but we finish each other’s with obscure movie quotes or song lyrics that truly no one else would think of. And often whoever started the sentence will say “that’s exactly what I was gonna say!”

After I’d been driving a new (to me) car for about six months I got home from work one evening and expressed dismay that I had rolled into one of those parking lot concrete curb like space delineators and crumpled my license plate. He chuckled and explained that he’d been unbending my license plate once or twice a week since I got the car. He never gave me a hard time about it in a sitcom, Mrs. Lockhorn wrecked the car again, way. He just unrolled it on his way to work.

He came with me to my high school reunion, both of us knowing it wouldn’t be fun for him, because scheduling made it necessary to make both 4 hour drives on the same day. And, since the obligation early the next morning was mine, he did the whole drive home from NY to Maryland at midnight and therefore did not drink at all at the party which might have improved it for him.

When we watch true crime type shows, which is fairly often, he will turn to me with a straight face and say “When you kill me in my sleep, don’t keep the chain-saw you use to dismember me in your own trunk.” He maintains the same sort of composure when I reply “A chain-saw would be too messy. I’ll probably dissolve you in a bathtub of acid.”

And he’s patient, and kind, and an excellent kisser. He cooks dinner frequently, and does more of the house work than I do. He treats my son as if he were our son and he’s nice to my mom (which she tries to make difficult but he’s not easily discouraged).

Oh, and he would defend me, our family and home against bears, alien invaders, lab-created dinosaurs, or ransacking Visigoths without hesitating, but not bugs. He is my rock, except when there’s a spider in the shower. Which just endears him to me all the more. Compared to what he does for me, carrying a spider outside is small potatoes.

22

He makes me feel really good about myself. I don’t think I’m hot or beautiful, but when he tells me I am, I know he believes it.

He’s very goofy and random and makes me laugh. Half the time we act like little kids together, saying dumb crap and settling “fights” by wrestling. We spend a lot of time playing Guitar Hero and Wii and making fun of each other when we screw up (it’s how my friends and I joke around too - insult each other).

Even though we hadn’t been together very long when I moved away, he was committed to making it work, and he is a bit of a commitment phobe (as in not rushing into anything) and he tries his hardest to keep me happy 2 hours away (which is a difficult task). He has a hard time putting feelings into words but he tries for me because he knows I need it.

He’s fuckin’ hot. :slight_smile: Even when he broke his humerus, had a huge green cast, was in severe pain and hadn’t showered in a couple days because he couldn’t, had ugly old clothes on, he was still hot. And he loves to cuddle. And he can cook.

But basically, just everything.

23

Hee, us too! Only we say “I knew you were going to say that!”

24

Jim has strengths where I have weaknesses, and vicey versy. For example, I am very enthusiastic and have no idea about my limitations. I have learned to run things by Jim first, and if he okays it, then I’m not likely to cut off my own head doing it (or trap myself in the basement, like the time I tried to move the futon frame). He’s very much not into change, so I force him out of his rut in healthy, positive ways (like buying a house just before the boom here, so we’re in a much more stable financial position that we would have been without it).

It’s not a specific example, but one of the ways I knew Jim was The One was that he always said the right thing. When we were having some kind of difficulty or disagreement, he would always come out with exactly the right response (and half the time, I didn’t even know what the right response should be).

Plus there’s the whole funny, sexy, reliable, good person who treats me with love and respect thing. :slight_smile:

25

My goal was to share only the first thing, but then I started gushing. These are all specific little things, though:

He’ll often fall half asleep with his head on my lap while we’re watching TV. When this happens, part of his brain doesn’t realize he’s actually asleep, and he’ll occasionally say bizarre things. A recent example: I was watching a home improvement show. They mentioned plywood. In his sleep, he mumbles “If plywood’s so cheap, why don’t they build dams out of it?”

He makes faces at babies in the grocery store.

During the winter, I stick my cold toes in the crook of his knees and he folds his legs over them until they warm up.

When he gets excited about a new project–hobby or career related–his enthusiasm is palpable. He is intelligent and passionate about projects he takes on, and it inspires me to work harder.

He’s excited and gives me a bear-hug when I make him his favorite sandwich for lunch.

He’s reliable; he keeps his promises. I trust him with my life.

26

Sometimes in the morning I’m half-awake when he’s dressing for work. And I’m kind of dimly aware of him kissing me on the forehead and putting the blanket around my shoulders (I tend to shrug it off in my sleep and get cold shoulders in the morning). And then I go back to sleep but when I wake up again I’m happy for the rest of the day. Well actually I’m happy every day, but I’m happier that day.
Also because he’s oddly protective of the plant on our balcony (we call it Planty). It was my idea to buy it but he’s kind of taken over. One day I noticed that there were some weeds in the soil but I left them there because they were pretty. So my fiance was on the balcony and then he came storming in with the weeds clutched in his hand.

Him: What’s this??
Me: Oh, they were some weeds in the pot. They looked nice.
Him: But they were killing Planty! No wonder he wasn’t growing properly.
Me: Oh my God …
Him: shakes weeds at me
Also because he pats cats really vigorously, as if they were dogs.

27

She puts up with me.

She loves all my critters, including my daughter.

She’s found that balance between supportive and overbearing.

She’s a stand up Scrabble and Trivial Pursuit opponent.

She laughs at my stupid jokes, and tells me they’re stupid.

She puts up with me.

28

Because he puts up with the strangeness that comes out of my mouth most of the time.

Because he will always try to answer my neverending questions (“Why does this happen” “How does that happen?” “Do you think the American missile silos on the border are going to goad the Russians into a second cold war?”)

Because when I’m freaking out on the train because someone sat next to me, or stood too close to me or looked at me, he’ll try and talk me down and be silly until I’m distracted.

Because even though he’s not a big cat lover, and my cat is an ornery, prickly, mean old fusspot, he’ll let her cuddle down in a ball on his lap and pat her and stroke her until she’s asleep.

Because he will discuss with me (in all seriousness), our survival plan for making it through the inevitable zombie apocalypse.

29

That’s all we have for people who want to share why they love their significant other? I would have thought people would have more to say on that subject.

30

That’s us, too - we’re not joined at the hip, but have enough things in common.

Also, he “got” me right from the start.

The story I always tell about how I knew he was a keeper is when we were at one of those lame parties where the men end up out by the grill and the women yap in the kitchen, and I saw him come in and motion to me to come outside.

He had gotten the neighbor of our hosts to let him bring me over to see their Dachshund, because he knew how much I missed my parents’.

31

The only response I could think of is, “Why wouldn’t I?”

But I’ve been trying to come up with things ever since I saw the thread and have managed to think of a few things that other people would understand.

He thinks I’m really smart, and loves that. He thinks I’m so smart that he’ll ask me all kinds of questions about stuff on the news or whatever, and he doesn’t mind if I’m stumped and give a half-assed guess before looking it up.

We’re each other’s best friend.

He forgave me, even before I confessed it, for my infidelity waaaaay back in college when we were dating. Somehow he understood that I was just scared and stupid, and accepted my tearful apology immediately. And he trusted me with all his heart, even when I went 6 hours away to grad school. That was almost 15 years ago, and I curse the stupid bitch I was back then, and love him with all my heart. I can’t imagine not being with him.

He does silly things that make me laugh, to the point where we have little in-jokes and habits in our interactions. A belch gets called “the mating call,” for instance, and yes I do laugh about it.

He believes in me.

32

Before I start listing things, you have to know that I left Canada and everything behind to come here to marry my wife - that’s how special she is to me. She’s the kind of woman that if I didn’t at least make an effort to meet her, I might never meet anyone else like her, and spend the rest of my life kicking myself for having settled for someone lesser.

She was a fully-formed person before we met, and does not require a man for validation.
We found each other due to mutual interest in rare recordings.
She is an accomplished, degreed musician. We speak the same language.
We are both lovers of the English language. We speak in puns, and lament people who have few language skills (why do they always get put in charge of writing what others have to read?). She appreciates my sense of humor.
She’s very smart and funny. She has no annoying habits (well, maybe cracking her knuckles, but that’s about it).
We don’t have to be in each other’s hair all the time, or even in the same room. We have comfortable silences.
She is not argumentative, and wants to fight even less than I do, which is not at all, so we never do.
She trusts me to do the right thing. She hasn’t tried to change me. She doesn’t try to restrict me in any way. She recognizes that she is my partner, not my boss, and vice versa.
We feel the same about the major issues of existence, and have the same goals in mind.
She says talking to me makes her feel better.
When we see examples of atrocious behavior in other couples, she reminds me how lucky she feels to have a husband like me because I don’t do that stuff.
She’s my best friend.
I am a lucky man.

33

I love him for being the smartest guy I know, and himself not even a Doper. He listens politely when I have to bring up yet another “On the board today…” topic.

I’m an uneducated blue-collar factory working single mother, and he values my opinions and looks forward to my point of view, how could I not love that?

I’m a cook, but he’s a chef. So 90% of the meals are made by me and they’re food and we eat them, but that ten percent that he cooks really blows my socks off. He never fails to thank me for a meal, either, and that kind of appreciation for the simple things melts me.

He’s indulgent. Even though our bedtimes are hours apart, he’ll always come cuddle with me when I lay down.

Specifics…the other day he was asking why I never use dinner candles. Not a complaint, just curious. Even though I know we have boxes of unscented tapers, I realized I think of candles as cozy or romantic smelly things, and not dinner stuff. I opined that I’d feel silly grabbing them for chili-mac on Tuesday, for instance, but that we should remember the next time he whips up something fabulous. He said that he often ate by candlelight when he was single, and that maybe it’s something we could try more often.
That image made me giggle a bit. I asked him: Did you enjoy some nice music while dining alone?
Him: Often, sure.
Me: And wine, right?
Him: Yes honey, you know that.
Me: Wine, candles, soft music…didja at least get lucky?
Him: (immediately) Every.Single.Night.
Me: (somewhat seriously) Aww, that’s rather sad isn’t it. With our schedules, you get way fewer orgasms than when you were single?
Him: But they’re better!

How can I not love comebacks like that, when Most Every Other Guy would be bitching about not getting enough?

34

An example of the kind of thing he tolerates. I knew I had to put this somewhere as soon as it came out of my mouth.

Him: I love you.
Me: Really? Like what? Like an armadillo? You know, except with hair.
Him: …
Me: No, I mean, not like a regular armadillo… but if those had hair.
Him: …

At that point I realized the ridiculousness of my statement, and collapsed into hysterical giggles. We talked about it, and it’s not even the weirdest thing I’ve ever said.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, I operate at an almost completely unconscious level when we’re together. I was just so deliriously happy that I was spouting nonsense and I didn’t care. And neither does he. He loves the complete delirium that is my brain. And I very much appreciate that about him. Not just complete and total acceptance, but complete and total enjoyment of who I am, even when that Someone makes no sense whatsoever.

35

He takes care of me.

We met almost 10 years ago on Yahoo chat. He dropped everything and flew from CA to Utah to be with me. He moved from Utah to the Bay Area for me. He moved from the Bay Area to LA for me. He moved from LA back to Utah for me.

He’s kind to my mother which is impressive because most days, I can’t even be kind to her.

He loves my animals even though he claims he doesn’t.

He warms my feet in the winter.

He’s devoted his entire life to my happiness. And he doesn’t just say that. Every damned thing he does is something to further the goal of my continued happiness.

He will literally talk to me for hours about Angel. Or whatever thing I’m obsessing on.

He helps me brainstorm fanfic.

He hates everything I hate.

We can communicate through grunts and gestures. When that fails, we can fall back on Futurama and Simpsons quotes.

He supports me unconditionally. I often think our lives would be easier if I just buckled down and got a full time job and gave up on this crazy shit I insist is important. He won’t hear any of it. School is important to me, so it’s important to him. Writing is important to me, so it’s important to him.

He likes the same music I like.

He likes the same movies I like.

He’s a good person. The sort of person you like as soon as you meet him. The sort of person you know you can trust.

He’s undone all the damage that was inflicted by my parents and bullies and my truly hellish childhood.

He taught me that it’s okay to cry. Tears were a sign to my parents to shout louder and terrorize me more.

He cried at our wedding.

He wakes me up every morning to say goodbye, and he always makes sure I’m covered and warm.
He knows I’m going to be successful at whatever I do. He doesn’t think it. He doesn’t believe it. He knows it.

I have a flash temper that anything can set off at any time. I don’t stay mad for long, but both of my parents were this way. I’m not sure if it’s genetic or a learned response. Either way, he forgives me for it.

He always forgives me for my mistakes.

36

I don’t.

I’m carrying his baby, fercrissakes, the baby he wanted so desperately. Pregnancy has put my nose into overdrive; I smell unplesant smells that might be there, of might even be imagined. And each and everyone of those unpleasant smells makes me miserable. So I asked him if he could at least clean out the three cat’s (his cats) litterbox twice a week instead of once a week. I can’t go near a litterbox, doctor’s orders.
He doesn’t.

37

There is a long list of reasons, and most have been mentioned. So I’ll just say this: she believes, as I do, that while you must inevitably get older, you can stay immature your entire life.

38

I’m so sorry, Masstricht.

39

Oh gee, what’s NOT to love about mine?

40

She’s kinky.

I was going to leave it at that, but reading some of these other posts has inspired me to write more.

She is the only girl who I’ve gone out with who continues to look better - in my eyes - each time I see her. Most girls, well sure, when I first date them they’re gorgeous. Then as time progresses and the flaws are revealed, they start to drop on the physical attractiveness scale. Not with this one. Everytime I see her, it is better than the last time.

She is not girly girly. She isn’t some girl who spends hours getting ready. In fact, on a day to day basis, I spend more time getting ready than she does! Related to this is her lack of makeup. 99% of the time she goes without makeup, yet she is still perfect.

She likes me. In all honesty she likes me for being me. And I like her the same way.

And in an effort not to ramble on forever, she’s kinky. She is willing to experiment with me. She’ll doll herself up just because I ask her to. She’ll wear something she isn’t comfortable wearing, because I tell her she looks gorgeous in it. Her and I are just a very perfect match in this category, and I’m happy I found her.

Lastly, she makes me happy. Each and everytime I see her, I smile. That is why I asked her to marry me.