Why does poo come out in a few "logs" instead of one long piece?

Well, I guess the title really asks the question.

[Captain Kirk]
Captain’s log. 20 centimeters. Now to wipe out the Klingons. Then it’s off to Uranus. The outcome is a crapshoot. It stinks. We must be ready for a warp core dump.
[/Captain Kirk]

Actually, it can emerge in one long piece. I’d offer proof, except it’s really hard to explain to the one-hour photo guy why you take pictures of that. :eek:

I don’t know about you, but in many folks the, uh, consistency of the, er, product can vary. If it’s cohesive enough, it may stay stuck together. If it’s not cohesive, you get multiple “branches” or “twigs” instead of a log. You might even get what a friend of mine used to refer to as “rabbit pellets”.

For what it’s worth, I find a diet heavy in Cheerio’s tends to make the longer logs. Your mileage may vary, as always.

(I can’t believe I responded to this thread instead of the one on airplanes :smack: )

The muscular contractions of the colon generally give the resultant product a segmental look.

Also, I think if you’re a tad bunged up, it has a tendancy to come out in bits, rather than a large piece.

Broomstick, I’m with ya - I can’t even believe I opened this

So that question’s been answered, here’s another;
Why are these “poops” tapered on the ends?

Because of the muscle contractions, of course -they’re not inatantaneous, so you get tapering.

It’s like a car crash - it’s not nice, but you just have to look

So your butthole doesn’t slam shut.

What? You were never in the third grade?


Hell, Buck The Diver, I was in third grade when dirt was rocks. In catholic school. Catholics don’t poop. I heard the joke from a public school kid.
BTW; where does one who live’s “DeepintheheartofTexas” dive? Keep it clean, please. :smiley:
Some Guy, you’re just playing along, right? Humoring me, right? Right?

In college, a massive poop was discovered in one of the toilets in my dorm. It was about 2’/60 cm long, and maybe 3" to 4" (8 to 10 cm) in diameter. The Turd of Turds ™ crossed the bowl, with one edge hanging over the top of the rim. It became something of a tourist attraction on campus, and it wasn’t flushed for about a week after its discovery. Simply amazing.

Could a long coiler be considered a single log?

Get a digital camera!! This guy did!!! :eek:


Too bad you didn’t get a picture. It would’ve been a perfect 10 at ratemypoo.com!

Re: long coiler - Yeah as long as it’s continuous. But then, if it coils it probably wouldn’t have the girth of the marvel that you beheld.

Why??? WHY??? Why did I click on that link?? Tell me why??? :eek:

…for the record, 80% of the time I’m a one log man.

Man, I remember some dumb 70’s teenage slasher movie that featured a freddy feces contest. Well they didn’t actually show it, but there was a scene…

Any parent knows that a 2 year old can evacuate something about the size of a coke can or like the 10 inch log I washed out of the potty last night. amazing

Tell me about it, Chinaguy.

Lilly, Queen of the Universe, came out of the bathroom last weekend and announced to the guests at my party “I just did a really BIG poop. Want to see it?”

One of my employee’s says his best friend has some condition (I don’t know what its called) that gives him massive turds. About as big around as a forearm (5-7" in diamter?) and at least as long (14-16"?). He had to get a special toilet so he could flush them. If he ever goes out and has to use the can it ALWAYS gets plugged, of course.

In case you want to put them back in.