Why I am not black this week.

Atleast once a week, Someone tells me how “white” I am. Mostly it’s due to how I speak. I have been hearing this for years now, and this week I am fed up.

Oddly enough, this weeks “You are so white”, started with some lyrics by a rapper Named Twista. Now normally people make fun of me for calling him Twister instead. I just can say Twist-a and make it sound right. Just like Nigger. My fellow black sistern and brethern can say Nigg-ah, and sound ok. If the word Nigger ever comes out of my mouth, I sound like Billy Bob McRacist. I am not fond of the N-word anyway, so normally this isn’t an issue. But I digress.

I had been listening to a song on a Twista cd. The lyrics in question are these.

Why don’t we, play something these hoes’d like
Drive whips, I know they like
Twista, you told her right
(I could make you a celebrity overnight)
Give you ice, like Kobe right
We sorta like Goldie right
The way, we mode em right
(I could make you a celebrity overnight)

I was curious to what some of the chorus meant. So I asked my “Apparently Blacker than me” Husband. He listens to rap alot more than I do, So I figured he would be an ideal place to start. I was informed that I was not listening to a chorus, but a “hook”. What the difference is, I couldn’t tell you. So he asked me which lyrics specifically I didn’t understand. In the middle of reciting the lyrics, I noticed that my Husband was comepletely cracked up. Because I recite lyrics “so white”.

I did learn that a “Whip” is a car. I got laughed at some more when it took me a minute to realize what “Ice” was. Now I am not so far gone that I haven’t heard the term ice referred to as jewelry. But, I have heard “bling bling” much more. My Husband was very amused that I thought that it was referring to Kobe buying his signifigant other one of those giant “bling blinging” necklaces I see rappers wearing. Sorry folks, but when I think of ice, I either think of ice cubes, not to be confused with Ice Cube, or Iced, Like, “Gee Boss I iced that fool and dropped him into the river with cement boots.”

I also had no clue who “Goldie” was. I know two Goldie’s. One is from the fiddler on the roof, and the other is Goldie Hahn(sp?). Is it really common knowlege that Goldie is a pimp?

I am really sick and tired of people assuming that I ashamed of my blackness, or trying to be white, Just because I am not up on the slang. Last I checked, How I speak has nothing to do with the color of my skin. I am no less black than someone who is “down in the hood”. Even my husbands ex-wife assumed I was white, just from hearing me on the phone. " Oh I see he couldn’t find a real black woman, always messing with those damn white girls" Excuse me? (The look on her face when we first met face to face was priceless however)

What is wrong with being black, and not sounding like a stereotypical black person? You all should hear some of the stuff I hear on a weekly basis.

“Oh you are so well spoken, not like the others.”
“Why you talk like that? You just trying to be white”

I know this is a weak rant, but I am sick and tired. I would had tossed “Gosh darn it all to heck” in there, but My Husband Just informed me that it makes me sound so cute and white :smack:

Sounds like quite a few strange and rude people abnout! So, would they expect a black newsreader, for instance, to speak like a rapper or something? I wouldn’t have the tiniest clue about those lyrics either, but I suppose being in Britain is something of an excuse.
Celyn often has people telling her that she doesn’t have enough of a local accent too. :frowning:

Before asking your husband, check out the Urban Dictionary.

Whips - Your maddest ride. In order to call yo car a whip, it’s gotta be sitin on at least 20’ or yo be wangstah, brotha

“I be ridin in my fly whip”

Ice - mad bling bling , diamonds , silver etc

i got so much ice u can skate on it nigga

Nothing on point for Goldie, but see “Goldie Lox”.

I am as white as they come and will never be hep*, but I hate it when cultural references/slang fly over my head.


*self fulfilling prophesy here

At least you’re married to a black man. :slight_smile:

My wife’s got the same problem as you, gooti. I told her that I had to marry outside my color, though. Should I have had kids with someone the same shade as me, the poor chitlins would have come out clear.

Wow you look amazingly like my ex husband. Who was also blacker than me.

Thanks for the urban dictionaryCj, Now I can brush up on my slang.


Was that picture by chance taken on Mt. Washington?


Not to be too horribly nosy, but…

How old are you? I’ve never (but then I’m from WAY up north, so my ignorance on this subject might be more than I thought), seen this as a “black/white” thing, but rather a generational, and/or environment thing (as in where were they raised).

I’m a white woman, nearing 45, originally from Alaska (now in Texas), and all of my black friends (who ARE btw, around my age, and still in AK), are just as annoyed at the “what the hell are they saying/acting like” thing" by young people (white, black AK native etc) as I am.

They too state that “those young whippersnappers and their lousy music/incomprehensible lyrics” sort of gripes.

I don’t think you’re acting “white”.

Since when is being and sounding educated an exclusive domain of WASPs?? Or being educated and wellspoken being a “sellout” or “acting white”??

No offense to your husband, but I’m on your side. VERY silly attitude IMHO.

When I was hired for my last job I got a phone call from the HR dept because I hadn’t filled out the form stating my ethnicity or whatever they’re calling it these days. I told the HR rep that as far as I am concerned my race is “human.”

I’m in what other people would call an “interracial” marriage. So what does that make my kids?

Nightlight, I think next time someone brings it up you should say you are neither black nor white. Say, “I’m just me.”

I know exactly what you mean, Deadly Nightlight. I’m a 19 year old black male, and the following facts are shocking but true:
[li]I’ve never shot/stabbed anyone, and I’ve never been shot/stabbed.[/li][li]I’ve never done/sold/bought drugs.[/li][li]I’ve never been to prison.[/li][li]I went to private school.[/li][li]I’m currently enrolled in college[/li][/ul]
You would think it was illegal for me to be black with credentials like that. I’m getting sick and tired of the bullshit I get from people. I came to the depressing conclusion that black people don’t believe you can be educated and keep your “blackness”, whatever the hell that’s supposed to be. We mistake a bunch of slang and stereotypical activity for who we really are.

I feel much better now.

I feel for you Deadly Nightlight to my everlasting shame, I can’t say Motherfucker (ah?), without sounding like an accountant. :frowning:

I just can’t seem to figure out what I’m doing wrong.

Oh, just to make you feal better, I had no idea about these terms either: hook, bling bling, Whip, Ice (does this mean white people; I kind of picked up on that from your context?) thanks for Goldie, though, I didn’t know that before today.

If it makes y’all feel any better, “hook” is music industry jargon. Originally a repeated and easily recognized melodic or rhythmic element, in rap (a primarily lyrical form) it appears to mean a repeated passage with easily recognizable rhythmic elements. Thus, it’s not the same as a chorus, but it sounds just like one (only shorter).

Chilluns, Skip, chilluns. You eat chitlins, you raise chilluns.

Ice refers to jewelry; typically diamonds.

Okay, whitey, listen up: Goldie is a UK trip-hop/drum n’ bass/jungle (umm… stuff that sounds a bit like a mix of hip-hop and techno) artist who made it big with the album Saturnz Revenge (or Revenge of Saturn, depending on where and when you bought it); specifically, the song Inner-City Life. He’s also sort of a British Jennifer Lopez, minus the badonkadonk (heh… another word for you to puzzle over)- he had major parts in Snatch and The World is Not Enough and a recurring bit part in the crappy UK soap EastEnders.

Indeed it was! It was taken at a friend’s wedding that was held up there.

Good eye! :slight_smile:

I’m going to alert my wife of this thread. I bet she has a story or two to tell, too. :slight_smile:

(And she married a whitey, too. Not that the latter is complaining, mind you!)

Well, let’s see here:
[li] I was almost stabbed once (Thank Og for martial arts training)[/li][li] I have done/bought drugs.[/li][li] I spent the night in the clink once.[/li][li] I went to public school.[/li][li] I dropped out of university.[/li][/ul]
**Where my niggaz at?! **

I hear that all the time, too, Nightlight. Once, I asked someone what “bling-bling” meant and he shook his head sorrowfully, put his arm around me in a consoling gesture and said, “Oh, my poor sister. You are soooo white.” Things like that happen fairly often.

And those lyrics you posted make absolutely no sense to me, either. I don’t like the N-word, I sound stupid if I use the “ah” sound where the “er” should be, and yes, GASP, I married a white man.

I wonder if Strom Thurmond is spinning in his grave because of people like us.

I can’t say that this is the product of a sheltered life, but I STILL associate “bling-bling” with spent rounds being ejected from a gun, and not dangly jewelry…