Sigh. Well, congratulations on a memorable first effort. If that represents the best you can do, just think of how much you can improve! Set a goal of, oh, say, three consecutive jobs where no one, no matter how accident prone, breaks any limb, and when you achieve it, give yourself a gold star. Or think about giving it up. I mean, if the very best you can do is, let’s face it, pretty pathetic – and a child with a broken arm is an automatic “F” in Babysitting 101 – then maybe you ought to consider not doing it anymore.
My point is that I think many people – even teenagers – would come home from such a day and think “I can’t believe I let things get so out of hand that a little kid broke her arm! Man, I feel so bad. I have got to do better next time.” If you have taken any degree of responsibility for what happened, I don’t see it here. I’m not saying you didn’t feel bad and realize it was at least in part your fault, just that it doesn’t sound that way.
Cogito, when you agree to watch someone else’s children, you are the boss of those kids ( and their friends) until the parents arrive home again.
If the situation got out of hand and was out of control, then you have only yourself to blame. Babysitting is an interactive job. You just can’t sit there watching cable while the kids run amok like ferrets on crack with their friends.
Children feed off of other children’s energy levels.
Children *need * boundaries. It is up to the babysitter to enforce those boundaries. I’m not talking about continous time outs (which are overused to begin with) and scrub my boots mentality. I’m talking about gentle reinforcements and *if you continue to do that, then this will be your punishment *.
The number one rule of taking care of children, including your own ( and a damn good rule in life) is * Never make a threat you cannot carry out. {/i] IE: If you don’t stop jumping on the couch I am going to kill you. This is an empty threat because you are not going to kill them. They know this. Kids have a very sensitive bullshit meter built inside them. A better threat might be along the lines of
no more tv for the rest of the afternoon or, my favorite, push ups and we ain’t talking ice cream, either. Ok, just kidding about the push ups (not really), but taking a toy away and putting THAT into a time out works like a charm.
Removing the visiting friends from the fracas would have quelled the situation. A babysitter must have backbone to step in and say " You guys are spazing out too much. Since you have ignored my warnings, the friends go home. If they don’t leave immediately * I’m calling their parents.And tell your parents what little savages you really are. *"
Frankly, if you are asked back to babysit again for this family, I would be surprised.
Does anyone else find it awfully odd that these parents came home to a five-year-old with a broken arm, and stuck with their plans to go out again the following night?
Damn, even if this is some work-related affair and not just din-din and the movies, I sure as hell would have figured a way out of it to stay home with my child.
Did they hire someone to take her to the hospital, too? While they were, y’know, otherwise engaged?
I think that those of you who are saying, “If you can’t do it, don’t babysit” to Cogito aren’t listening to everything he is saying (if I’ve got your gender wrong, please correct me, Cogito). His parents told him that he had to babysit, whether he wanted to or not. Next time, he might have an even better argument not to (“Mom, I don’t feel comfortable babysitting those kids, 'cause I don’t think I can control them. Remember what happened to Briana that time?”), but if he told them he didn’t feel able to handle it, they should have listened. He wasn’t ready to be “in charge,” but his parents were at fault for making him take on this level of responsibility, especially when the primary risks were to other children.
Ditto to that. When I was 12 and my sister was 10 we were tasked with the babysitting of our 2nd cousin. A six year old who spent all his time with little cars running them all over everything (including you) and making an annoying rumbling noise in his throat (he had done this for so long that he had ruined his voice). Now my sister and I never agreed on anything. We fought like cats and dogs all the time. I hope I am making this clear. We even chased each other around with knives at one point (lovely childhood if I do say so). The one time we ever agreed about anything was in dealing with this kid. We locked the little monster in a closet until the parents arrived back from the bar. Remember, we were 10 and 12 and that was the only action we could think of at the time based upon our knowledge and experience. Obviously, we didn’t even think of the consequences of such an action.
It is always nice to look back and say someone should do this, or do that, but when someone doesn’t have the experience necessary to do the job and states so, I in no way think it is right to blame them if things go wrong.
Just a side note: My 2nd cousins surname was actually ‘Moron’. I wonder if that had anything to do with why the parents figured is was safe to leave the kid with us? Maybe they were trying to live up to their name.
Cogit, If I were you I’d have a frank talk with my mother and tell her that you just don’t feel like you can handle b babysitting. It’s not fair to you, or to the children who you are in charge of, to take on a job you feel you can’t handle.