Why Must They Touch Me?!

The BBQ Pit
1

This is a rather mild rant, but as of this morning, I’ve had enough. It’s regarding my damn fingernails.

It seems everywhere I go, people seem to want to, without even asking, reach out and grab my hand and feel/look at my nails. Some even try to BEND my nails. They closely examine my nails, both top and underneath. I’ve even had a few start PICKING at my nails, which, I might add, does NOT last long! I usually scream now when the picking begins, and that backs 'em up real fast, usually with an apology.

I have long nails, but I don’t think they are any longer or any more special than someone with false nails. My nails are mine. I grow them well. I like them long and I take good care of them. I’ve never been to a manicurist in my entire life. I just have good, strong, long nails for some reason.

Many women tell me they hate me for it, as is what happened earlier this morning at my doctor appointment. The nurse grabbed my hands, checked out my nails, both top and underneath. Then, she walked out of the room, only to come back in a minute later, with another nurse AND THE OFFICE LADY, to show them my nails. They ALL told me that they hated me for having such long nails. Well, I told them that it wasn’t exactly a difficult thing to do. Just stop biting them and you’re halfway there. They didn’t seem to think that was the case. They asked each other, NOT ME, if they were REALLY real. I assured them that they WERE real. …and I was rather pissy at the time I told them, so they left very quickly.

People think they can just come up and check out my damn nails. WHY? Why do they DO this?! Are they THAT stupid? There have been women that were working the checkout lanes take my hand and look closely at my nails. A lady that works at my vet’s office has done it. One of the ladies at the freakin’ courthouse did it when I went in to pay the property taxes. Complete strangers walk right up to me, grab my hand and try to bend my nails! It happens in restaurants, malls, freakin’ amusement parks, even!

My Og! How STUPID can some people be? I don’t like being ‘touched’ in the first place. It squinks me out really bad, especially if I’m being touched by a total stranger! I have my own sense of personal space and these people are invading it. I do NOT like it. At. All.

I don’t know how to make them stop, other than hacking my nails off! It’s not like I keep them really long (As of right now. This may change VERY soon, as I am seriously contemplating hacking them off!). Each of my fingernails are, from cuticle to the end of the nail, 3/4" long. I’ve seen women with much longer nails. Does this happen to them, too? Maybe people feel that I’m just more approachable? Maybe I look like a circus freak that they have to come up and touch?

My husband is always shocked when it happens, as is my mother and several of my friends, as they have been with me when it has happened. My husband keeps expecting a phone call from me, calling to have him bail me out of jail for hitting someone because of it. They are in awe of the nerve that some people have.

I do believe the next sorry bitch (Only women do this. Never has a man done it.) that does it, is going to get a swift punch in nose. I don’t give a damn who she is or where we are at the time. I’m sick and tired of being nice about it.
I’ve had enough!

2

Instead of punching them, you should poke them with your longest nail.

3

It happens to me too. I don’t mind the looking, even if they grab my hand, but No Bending! NO!

4

Naw, not a punch in the nose. Nope, next time some clueless git grabs your hand, clench your fingers into talons and convulsively claw the living shit out of the grabber’s hand, while emitting a glass-shattering shriek. Followed by a horrified, “Oh, I’m SO sorry, ever since all the bones were broken in that hand I’ve been dreadfully sensitive.”

That ought to do the trick. :smiley:

5

People grab your hand without permission and start playing with your nails? And they do this often? Wha…? :eek:

Is the attention paid possibly some class or cultural thing where some women do this beacuse it’s normal and complmentary (in their cultural context) to admire nice nails, or is all women across all cultures that do this?

I still don’t get the touching without permission thing regardless of culture.

6

I also find it interesting how often women say, “I hate you” to each other like it’s some cute little thing, and still more interesting how often they seem to really mean it. Bitches! :slight_smile:

7

I used to get that all the time when I had longer nails, though I never had anyone try to bend them! I grew them b/c as a kid I always bit them and picked at them. Once I stopped I learned that the best way to get your nails to grow long is to leave them the fuck alone! The most I do to mine now is put some Sally Hansen lotion on my hands (comes in an orange tube and smells like orange tic-tacs, forget what it’s called). Sometimes I put a clear strengthener on, but only when I remember.

The more I paint my nails and trim and file them, the more they break. Nobody every beleives that though - you must be lying and keeping the secret of long nails from them!

I also am lucky enough to have nice, smooth feet and decent looking toenails as well. I always get the snide, “oh, you’re so luck to have time and money to get pedicures all the time!” Yeah, that one pedicure I got at a beauty school really shows off my wealth and status, huh?

Some people just won’t accept that sometimes people are just lucky to have certain features. I’d certainly give up my nice feet for a faster metabolism, but I don’t go around saying I “hate” thin people who can eat a lot and not gain weight and not exercise. They’re just lucky, and it has nothing to do with me.

8

Yah - when my nails are long people do that to me as well - I sort of go through cycles - they’ll be really long (ie about an inch), and then I’ll get cheesed off and cut them all off, which is where I’m at now.

I’ve never had someone try to bend them though. :confused:

9

CynicalGabe, I’d like to do that, in all honesty!

Dung Beetle, yeah, the bending is the worst.

EddyTeddyFreddy, I do that sometimes, when they start trying to bend them.

Astro, well, I AM in Indiana, so, for the most part, culture and grace has illuded a great many people. I don’t know if they’re trying to decide for themselves if my nails are fake or real. All they would have to do is ASK. I really don’t appreciate the touching thing.
::shudders::

10

I’ve got the blessing of the good strong nail-growing genetics, and truly that’s what it is, just genes. Some people do everything right and drink gelatin by the gallon and primp and condition and sacrifice goats and can’t grow more than a 1/16 past the quick without rippage, bless their hearts. I don’t do much of anything “right” to protect my nails, they’re just long and strong anyway.

So yep, people are amazed and grab my hands sometimes. I prefer to allow it all limp-handed then bark like a loon and grab theirs all quick, cuz that’s sorta fun y’know, but if you wanna go with the nose-punching option, it’s certainly understandable.

11

“I’m sorry, I must have heard wrong. Did you say you HATE me?” (Followed by a blank stare. Let them try to explain their incredibly rude remark.)

12

badbadrubberpiggy, I hear THAT! I very much agree with what you said!

alice_in_wonderland, I guess the bending is how they can tell if they’re fake or not? I have no idea.

Queen Tonya and Scarlett67, those are great ideas!..The 'grab ‘em back’ and ‘the question’. Sounds good!

13

I’ve never had anyone come up and grab my hands, but I do get people asking me if they’re real all the time when I wear nail polish.

Of course they are real! I’ve never worn fake nails (except for the odd cheap halloween ones) and probably never would as I took some esthetics in high school and they told us the possible problems that could be had with them. Besides, I like mine just fine.

It hasn’t happened lately, but I’ve taken to just buffing them and doing polish on rare occasions.

14

[Darlene Conner]
Any part of you that touches me you’re not getting back.
[/DC]

That ought to back a few people up off of you.

15

People always comment on my hair and sometimes they want to touch it, but it doesn’t bother me. I only get annoyed when they then refuse to believe that it’s real. “Is that/are those real?” is an extremely rude question and when you make it worse by not believing the answer, don’t be surprised when I put my fist through your face.

16

I love how they carefully phrase it as “real” as opposed to “are those your nails” instead. Because then you get the “Of course they’re mine, I paid for them!” reply instead. :rolleyes:

Bending is totally the ‘real’ check, the tips or even gel overlays are way tougher and unyielding.

17

I have had people comment on my nails, when I’ve managed to grow all ten to a decent length at one time. I’ve never had anyone grab my hand. I am so glad, because there would be loud noises at the very least. There would be bloodshed if some idiot tried to bend one of them.

I think theads such as this are one of the reasons I love the SDMB. I can show them to my husband and say “See, I’m not that weird! I don’t go around grabbing peoples hands and bending their fingernails.”

18

I’ve always gotten the “is that your real hair color” thing and they used to rub my head when I was little. They don’t touch my hair anymore because I think I put off “don’t touch me vibes” (in part as a reaction to constantly being touched as a kid). I do still get people asking me where I get my hair dyed tho’. :dubious:

Nobody’s ever asked me about my nails because they are obviously fake being long, square, and hot pink.

19

Oh my god. One of my idiosyncracies is that I HATE having my nails or hair touched. No one gets away with this, not my boyfriend, or mother, or even grandmother. I can’t imagine what I would do to a stranger that tried.

20

Not always – my nails are pretty hard to bend, and yes, they’re long, and real.