I know, it just keeps getting better and better, doesn’t it? Like just when you think he can’t outdo himself, he does.
You can’t beat this for astounding egotism, can you?
“There is nothing wrong with me.”
Yeah, you might want to get that looked at, dude.
(Can you imagine actually dating that guy?)
Counter-example: I woman I’d been seeing cooked us a wonderful chicken dinner. As we were clearing the table she asked if I’d liked the chicken, I answered “It was fine but wasn’t like Mom’s.” She took me to bed for the first time later that night 
but I heard about it a few weeks later. Boy did I hear about it!!! :smack: Lesson learned.
That voicemail was astounding.
Doink! Doink! 
(from my single days)
To Add: If you ‘really think we have something special’ and after learning I have a car on campus and proceed to say that you’d really like to go on a nice romantic drive right now at 2AM, don’t pull 5 yenta roomates out of thin air as we start to go with “I want to be dropped at Donny’s house” “My parents are just in the next county” “Drop us at the Douglas Student Center” and “I want to go HOME. (‘where’s home?’) In Yooooonkers…” :smack:
In short, if you want to bang a cabbie, there’s 5 in line at the train station just waiting for you. You can work out who tips who later…
I personally experienced #10 on that list. “Oh, I don’t read, but I did like The Da Vinci Code!”
The scariest part is that the phone number he leaves has a Toronto area code. 
Wow, hardcore idiot. I’d be tempted to return his call with something like, “I’d like to cordially invite you to go fuck yourself.” Or maybe, “If you’re so awesome, why are you sounding desperate?”
Oh my! :eek: That guy with the voicemail - what an absolute idiot. Did anyone else want to slap some sense into him? He was so full of himself and clearly didnt realise that he must be suffering something psychological himself!
There was a guy who was a friend of a friend who really wanted to date me, but committed several cardinal sins that eliminated him from consideration. First, he told me outright that he had 10 piercings in his penis, and was allergic to latex, so no condoms. Also, admitted that he got the piercings to make his small penis look bigger. Lastly, one of his hobbies was suspension, which is hanging from hooks embedded in the flesh of his back. Um, thanks but no thanks!
I’da thought “Uh, Rubystreak, before we go out for the first time, and I know you haven’t said yes yet, there’s something I want you to know about my penis–” woulda been sufficient. Did you really need to hear about the 10 piercings, the cocker spaniel-like size, the no-condom policy (how would you fit one over the piercings anyway, with no leakage and no punctures?), and the suspension before making the call?
That voicemail… wow. Talk about a control freak with an overdeveloped sense of himself. The sad thing is it probably works enough to convince him to keep it up.
And he hasn’t heard of the wonder of NON latex condoms?
Apparently this guy is Dmitri the Lover, who was on the cover of Eye not so long ago. Hey – I know the person who wrote that article! Small world. 
I have one of my own. Don’t say, “That’s a good thing! I’ve got a thing for girls with short legs.” Gimme a break. I was hammered. :smack:
I like how the guy on the voicemail says that he’s completely single. Is there such a thing as “partially” single?
Hee hee hee! Even better is that that voicemail could have come from Mr. Narcissist himself.
Of the many things he did wrong: asked almost immediately what I liked to do in bed. I told him, politely, that I don’t have that conversation with strangers, and if down the road it became evident he would need to know, we’d have the conversation then. A day later we’re IMing and he drops in “You know, you never did tell me what you like to do in bed.” My response: “Yep. You’re right!”
Apparently he decided to forgive me that “transgression” because he IMed a couple days later. I indicated that I thought it was a bad idea to have any expectations on a first meeting. He threw an absolutely hysterical hissy fit and told me I was stupid for not recognizing how unique he was and that I should feel Privileged, dammit, to date him. Someone like him only comes along once in a lifetime!!!ONE!!
Unfortunately, he signed off (modern equivalent of slamming down the phone, I guess) before I could respond with “And thank god for that!!”
Glad I’m not the only one who shuddered as he started reading off his number. Wugh.
even later