Mish or spooning, mostly.
(and on Christmas Eve, too ! Hell ain’t a bad place to be.)
I’m sure i will catch an ass load of flack for my opinion but…
If i should be in a coma, and if i should be so fortunate as to have a wife
and i wake up and find you have put words into my mouth on the lie of “my behalf” and i find that you have cruelly and inhumanely prosecuted and incarcerated and harassed my wife and slandered her, I will do everything within my ability to return the pain upon you 1000 fold.
She isn’t raping me or violating me, the deed to the penis became hers at marriage, been that way since the 1st marriage in the world.
If she can make it work, and it makes her feel better, by all means make use of it.
She isnt disturbing me, i’m in a coma sleep is not an issue, she isn’t hurting me, im in a friggin coma for one, and secondly i’m pretty sure she is well aware of how not to break me.
She isn’t doing something disgusting, i’m in a coma, i’m not fucking dead.
And since i am in a coma, i might actually be aware and enjoying it and just not able to tell you.
And since i am not fucking dead, do not think for me, do not feel for me, do not do jack shit on my behalf, only one human being has that right granted her by marriage.
And if the penis is also comatose, and i’m not showing any signs of waking in a reasonable amount of time, do what you deem is best without guilt.
Before you do anything though, make sure that i am in a coma under my own power, and not in a coma only because some machine wont let me simply die.
If a machine is keeping me alive, kill the machine.
You’re not worried about foreclosure?
Do you feel the same way about your spouse? Do you own her vagina to do with what you will, no matter the circumstance?
In my defense…
… but yeah, my jaw dropped when I saw what I’d said.
Levdracon is embarrassingly misogynistic because he had a shit Mom, but I can guarantee you he ain’t rapin’ no women.
I’m fairly confident you won’t. Some mockery, perhaps.
Did she have to take out homeowner’s insurance?
Last time I checked, “vagina” and/or “penis” wasn’t listed as community property on any legal document.
If his penis is crooked, would it help if his wife took out a lien on it?
In case of divorce, does she still get it on weekends and holidays?
Maybe that’s what Lorena Bobbitt wanted - a division of marital assets.
Weird cases yield weird arguments or stretched arguments. I’m not sure about the absolute application of ‘if there wasn’t explicit consent at each stage it’s rape!’ and ‘proving’ this argument by referring to the century. As far as it being a crime. Unless the law in the place has foreseen enough to say eg. ‘sex with any comatose person is rape’. In which case as other poster said, the person doing this, weird at the very least IMO, thing is responsible to know the law and do the time.
But the moral question IMO would be whether the couple had some agreement, even implicit, that would allow this morally. I don’t know that. Several people have tried to put themselves in the position of either party and said ‘no this is not moral’, but they aren’t the actual people in the relationship. Back to law, you can outlaw something likely to be immoral, or that isn’t even immoral, so no contradiction here if the act was in fact illegal where/when committed.
But back to the New Standard, it’s still not written in stone anywhere that consent between a married couple is exactly the same morally as between strangers agreeing to have sex. Simple formula, but can be unrealistic IMO for married couples. And my point is not disproved by just constructing an example where it obviously is immoral to have sex with a spouse without explicit consent for that particular sexual session. Of course you can construct many such examples. But that’s not proving that the situation is always and everywhere the same in a married couple as with a stranger, and that one simple rule applies seamlessly to both situations.
I’m trying to imagine how the topic of “Honey, If either of us is comatose, would it be o.k. if the one that isn’t use the other as a fucktoy whenever we want?” could possibly come up in normal conversation without the other person immediately backing away and/or calling a lawyer.
To spend a moment engaging the hypothetical seriously, I could picture some kind of pre-arrangement where someone declares that if they are in an extended coma or PVS and if it is medically feasible to be cared for at home, they should be taken home. At that point, their spouse becomes the primary and sole authority for medical decisions and all activities the comatose spouse will be subjected to, including sexual activity.
As a matter of practicality, I’m opposed to someone engaging in sexual activity with a comatose spouse while that spouse in a hospital or some other medical facility where the medical personnel have responsibility for the afflicted spouse’s care, though not because it is sexual per se, but that the hospital should be able to prevent and/or monitor any stressful activity the comatose spouse is subjected to, because they have to deal with resultant complications, if any.
As a hypothetical, picture someone who is getting a complicated tattoo that will take multiple sessions to fully render. Midway through, they suffer some injury or illness putting them in a coma. I would respect the hospital’s imperative to prevent the spouse from coming into the hospital with tattoo gear to finish the design even if the spouse was a fully licensed tattoo artist (depending on the local requirements of such). The hospital can say they don’t want their patient subjected to anything that won’t advance their care and may in fact aggravate it. In the case of a tattoo, there is always the chance of skin infections. In the case of sexual activity, there is the possibility of physical injury to the comatose spouse (and possibly pregnancy of the comatose spouse, which would certainly complicate coma care). If the spouse wants to sign out the patient and take up full authority for the ongoing care, fine. Let them bear full responsibility for whatever happens.
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That would obviously affect the hospital’s role, but not directly the legality or morality of the act itself.
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Even more practically, I’ve read of complaints about hospitals’ policies restricting patient sex with visitors when everybody is conscious, a scenario not as rare or far fetched as the one being discussed. But likewise the hospital sees it in terms of their own responsibilities and perhaps values/opinions.
So either way, it’s completely unsurprising a hospital would have a big problem with this but it’s not the whole issue. On previous comment, would I and my wife sit and discuss this? No, but lots of people might as well be from another galaxy than we are I’ve learned, on values type stuff. And I think the bigger point, besides single bizarre incident, is whether one assumes identical rules and assumptions would be made about a married couple as some sensitivity class would teach on campus about ‘dating’ (ie sex with virtual strangers) etiquette. A number of posts tend to imply this, to me.
Well, I’m just running with the concept advanced by Weisshund and how his wife has the “deed” to his penis, i.e. if for the sake of argument we assume that one spouse has a legal right to demand sexual interaction with the other. It’s not a concept I personally support, but if we accept it, then I can imagine one spouse using the unresponsive (?) comatose body of the other for gratification but I can see a hospital interceding if it has custody of the comatose spouse and obligations for ongoing care. A spouse’s right (again, accepted for the sake of argument) to demand sex should not imply the right to demand that sex can occur on someone else’s property or when it conflicts with someone’s else reasonable interests (in this case, the hospital’s interests in not having their patient’s condition potentially aggravated by injury, pregnancy or sexually-transmitted disease). If someone wants unrestrained sexual access to the comatose spouse, let them take full custody and responsibility for care of that spouse.
Nah, she wanted to cut him off completely.
Good thing it was a marital relationship and not a business one - she could have gone for a complete severance package.
So just wondering, if I’m your wife, and I say “no”, does that mean you have to stop?
You people sure have twisted sets of moral standards … fucking zombie threads and punting house cats is bad enough … but place-kicking puppies ?!? …
Czarcasm, you should be ashamed of yourself …