Ok first we get all countries to eliminate all conventional weapons and only use large aquatic mammals to wage war with. Think of the damage done by an intercontinental blue whale dropped with laser precision (not to mention the demoralization factor of seeing those poor sad whale eyes flying over your bunker. Perhaps some porpoise carpet bombs? Not only would this solve our problems with nuclear war residue but the worlds whale population would increase tenfold by the hidden Iraqi whale bunkers alone.
You know you’re getting soundly beaten when the opposition begins lobbing octopuses.
Giant squids would be more effective.
This reminds me of one of my favorite
books .
“We did not bomb the Astrusian Embassy on porpoise.”
“In a shocking development, the rebels began firing eels into US positions. The garrison commander was quoted as saying “They’re slippery little devils, alright. And the rebels aren’t easy to catch either.””
“Republican leaders today assailed John Kerry Jr’s Purple Heart - awarded during his tour of duty in the War on Canada for an “equestrian accident in the line of duty” - claiming to have eyewitness evidence that Kerry Jr was merely grazed by a sea horse.”
“400 tons of weapons grade haddock has dissapeared from the stockpiles of the former USSR. The entire country is under a cat scan to locate the hoard.”
“I love the smell of carp in the morning. It smells like…a cheap brothel.”
And you begin to blubber.
Enquiring minds want to know:
Was the garrison commander’s hovercraft filled with eels?
This whole thread is stupid. There’s no way the US armed forces would use marine mammals on the battlefield. Ridiculous, I say.
I agree. The whole concept is utterly
ridiculous .