I looked up and saw a new city…surround in seven layers of parking lots, glittering like gold.
It was a city named for the sparkling wines of France, but spelled differently, because it’s Illinois after all.
And I saw the faithful streaming forth, and they bore the mark of the savior on their backs, and that number was ten times five plus four. This number allowed them to enter the city and worship, and buy and sell goods.
And the heretics and the unwashed were there in the new city. And they relied on the talents of strangers, a new leader, a new defense, a new fucking everything, even KICKER…none of them fucking knew each other, they had to wear god damn name tags just to call a few plays, and Mike Tice was fucking shaking hands, introducing himself to everyone in the locker room like some sort of gigantic fey…
ahem.
AND LO!
The battle in the new city began, and I sat IN THE FUCKING SIXTH ROW OF THE STADIUM and cheered as the mighty warriors of Jauron defeated the VIKINGS.
I have Brett Favre as my QB on TWO of my fantasy leagues this year!
SO THAT ASSURES HE WILL SUCK
SO THERE!
The Pack still sucks, the Pack still sucks, The Pack still sucks, the pack still sucks. They really really really really really really suck! Yes the Pack…stilllllll sucks.
Have pity on this long suffering Charger fan. You know it’s going to be a long year when one of the LA Times’ experts picked the Bolts to finish 5th in their division, especially when there are only FOUR teams in the division now.
The Vikings defense this year will be using the “Ole” strategy of letting running backs and wide receivers run past them for scores until they are too tired to continue and are forced to forfit the game. Either that, or they have a sucky defense again.
Oh Randy Moss, enjoy those triple teams all season. My Moss Meltdown Over/Under is 5 games.
Oh Pack fans- Bret Favre is due a serious injury. And their wideouts are none too impressive (other than the kid- Walker, but he is a rookie). The Packs defense will determine how far they go.
The Eagles are a bit overrated too. Quick- name their wideouts. Thought so. Andy Reid is getting too big for his britches (in more ways than one)- his hissy fit over Trotter’s contract will hurt them, as will his baffling handling of the wideouts.
Nobody is watching the Titans this year-- that may be a mistake if the defense is healthy.
Oh Waren Sapp-- please shut up already. :rolleyes:
Lo and the hapless Bears…even though they won their division, couldn’t have true sellouts of Memorial Stadium. Not enough Bears fans could be bothered with the exhausting commute down I-55.
And an angel appeared to the Bears office staff!! Verrily, we can reduce the official “capacity” of Memorial Stadium…and blame it on, ummmm, security! Yeah that’s it! Now we can avoid blackouts…everyone is happy.
And then the Bears discovered the fun of playing something a wee bit tougher than a 5th place schedule.
Aw c’mon jarbaby, you was just dickin elenoh around, weren’t you?
The Vikings will score more than 10 points, the Bears will score more than 10 points, but the Vikes will score much more, because I much rather see a pregnant jarbaby, than see elenoh with child.
I think it’s established that no team can win on a first place schedule with Jim Miller as their quarterback. To paraphrase the Sports Guy,“When you have Jim Miller as your quarterback, you have Jim Miller as your quarterback.” Now, if you traded Miller and Favre…man, that would be a good Chicago team.
BTW, jar, I was just up in Chicago for the first time over Labor Day weekend and decided it’s my favorite city of all time. I’d move there, but I fear the winters. Congratulations on a fine achievement (although, I was disappointed to see luxury boxes going up on Soldier).
