I strongly agree that this is part of the problem; I won’t put up with hearing a woman run down because she has too many sexual partners, or is affectionate with too many people. I will argue the point or leave the conversation, whichever seems most appropriate. Women seem to be the worst offenders on this score; I have lots of theories why, but that’s another three pages of text.
I don’t agree that this problem is a reason (or even a valid excuse) to participate in the continuing commodification of women’s body parts. Making an informed choice is one thing; allowing your body to be made into an object out of fear of others’ opinions is another. Obviously, there are many places where women have to fear for their lives or livelihoods if their reputation is sullied; I think (or maybe it’s hope) that developed, first world countries are not part of that. I probably should have pointed out that my rant is aimed mainly at the demographic with which I am familiar - first world women.
I am looking forward to A Priori Tea’s take on the other Great Holiday Mystery: why all those womens’ magazines on sale in the supermarket checkout line have flashy cover promos simultaneously promising two mutually exclusive outcomes:
Lose 20 Pounds Over The Holidays!
Make Fantastic Gooey Cakes And Pies They’ll Slurp Up And Beg For More!!!
I’m assuming it takes a pretty strong-willed cook to bake up all those calorific treats and yet resist stuffing them into her own, um, Cavern Of Bottomless Pitdom (lest this reference to the cook as female be thought sexist, I’m betting not too many guys read the Ladies’ Home Journal).
Heh, very nice OP, A Priori.
Totally off-topic, but I’m a little surprised to read that you’re a woman, as you write like a guy. I can’t be specific about why that’s so – something about the way you use parentheticals and dependent clauses, maybe – but there’s something about your writing style that just seems … male. Most likely it’s just that it reminds me of my own prose.
Anyway, since I’m a raging misogynist, you should take this as a compliment.
Well, I think that being hard makes getting in easier, but your experience may trump mine…
And I wouldn’t want to buy the way in. If I was to buy a membership for her, it would be because I greatly valued her as a person and a poster I wished to get to know better (and I had enough money to afford a membership). That, and the girlfriend might have an issue with that.
I admit that I skimmed most of the OP. Tell me if I’m misreading this–the OP is upset because a) advertisers seem to offer gifts as a way to get in a woman’s pants and b) some women buy into that. Well…
a) I’m shocked that advertisers would conflate sex with their wares. SHOCKED.
a’)That said, I can’t think of any commericals (short of the Family Guy spoof) which says buy her a rock and queue up at the tunnel. I suppose one with a jundiced eye could read them that way, but the point of giving is supposed to be to show the receiver that the giving cares and wants them to have something special. Anyone who thinks gift=sex is sadly mistaken.
b) I’m shocked that some women would take men (or other women) for rides in order to get nice things. SHOCKED.
b’) The number of gold diggers are rather small, all things considered. The number of people who seem to think that paying for dinner equals sex afterwards, however, is a lot larger than it should be. It sucks for all parties involved.
Tell me I’m misreading this. Tell me that the number of posters before me read something different. Tell me we don’t need to rehash the whole “nice guy” agruement. The OP is sounding to me like a “nice guy” doppled into the body of a woman or maybe she’s the genuine article–the exclusive “nice girl.”