Women: What's the sexual appeal of being spanked?

I was watching an old episode of “Two and a Half Men” and there was a joke that relied on the cliche of a sex-crazed woman screaming, “Spank me! Spank me!”

Personally speaking I’ve encountered this situation only once in real life. My partner did not exactly scream, but she did make it known in no uncertain terms that she wanted me to spank her.

I ask this not to be judgemental in any way, but what exactly is the appeal of being spanked? Is it a dominance thing? Or is the actual pain a turn-on? Or is your butt an errogenous zone that craves stimulation? Or is it something else entirely?

Thanks all, in advance.

I’m not a woman and I don’t like being spanked but there are several possible dynamics.

  1. The pain/pleasure principle. Pain and pleasure - Wikipedia
  2. Dominance, as you mentioned.
  3. It’s like other wild expressions during sex. IE, biting, hair pulling, sweaty-let yourself go behavior.
  4. If they’re anything like me when I get really going…essentially my entire body is an erogenous zone.

I’m sure there are other possibilities that aren’t coming to mind at the moment.

And of course, there are plenty of guys that like being spanked too.

I didn’t even know I liked it until recently. My current boyfriend is the only person who has ever really tried it, and I am pretty certain I would have had a bad reaction to it from anyone else. I have a much stronger level of trust with him than with anyone else I’ve been with.

He never smacks me hard enough to actually hurt, and I wouldn’t like it if he did, I’m pretty certain. There’s something pretty hot about the surprise of it.

Maybe it’s a little dominance thing, too. Though I’m a total introvert, I’m a control freak, Type-A, always ON, who’s at my six, what’s going on, hyper-aware kind of person 99% of the time… With him, in bed… I am totally ok with letting go of that. Eager to, in fact.

So yeah… my two cents. Now… I think I should go find him…

[quote=“stuyguy, post:1, topic:579182”]

Or is your butt an errogenous zone that craves stimulation?
Umm… yes “stuyguy” the “butt is an errogenous zone that craves stimulation.”

I find that open-handed, bare-handed spanking doesn’t really hurt. If it did, the person doing the spanking would be hurting their hand, too. Or I’ve only managed to find people who do it just right, that seems unlikely. I’m not into it much, but there’s appeal in some biting, too, so maybe I’m a bit over the edge, I dunno. Maybe my pain tolerance is high. Spanking just stings a bit, and it’s the little bit of - surprise I guess is a good term as Soliloquy said - because you don’t know exactly when it’s going to happen. It’s just a bit of fun, something different to throw into the mix once in a while.

Spanking that devolves into hitting that causes welts and bruises, that’s a whole different thing.

A little smack gets the buttock red, which, of course, means increased blood flow in the general area wherein increased blood flow is a very good thing.

I can say from very recent personal experience that it is easy to hurt the other person’s ass without hurting your own hand with an open handed spank.

She likes the dominance and a hint of pain.

I have an experiment for you: Just try to bite you lip a bit while you are self-pleasuring. If that makes you feel good, then you’ll understand a lot better than with just any explanation we can give.

All three things you’ve suggested. It’s definitely the fun kind of pain. It’s not like, I dunno, stomach cramps or stubbing your toe.

The anticipation makes you clinch up your muscles in that area, making things feel tighter. And then with the smack there’s the release of that tension. It sends a vibration straight to the right spot for me.

Interesting. It’s never worked for me.

Not a female, but yes, pain can be a turn on. Nothing wrong with leaving marks either, as long as both parties consent to it.

Like getting a hickey can be fun, too.

It’s a pain/pleasure thing for me. I don’t sit around wishing I could be spanked but in the heat of the moment I’ve found that I like the feeling of a smack or a bite. But in an erogenous zone, not on my face or my foot or anything.

Hmmm, I’da thought the thread title should be "Brits: What’s the sexual appeal of being spanked? "

Thanks for the replies, folks; that narrows it down.

Beats the hell out of me. Physical discomfort is a turn-off, and I was spanked often as a child and found it humiliating, wouldn’t want to recreate any aspect of that.

I see what you did there.

Well, I like getting spanked and bitten, and having my hair pulled. I have a hidden submissive side in the bedroom that’s coming out more than ever with my current boyfriend (since he’s dominant and aggressive without being mean or douchy). I also like when sex is uninhibited and unpredictable, and him spanking me is just a little fun extra thrown in.

I used to get the little porn mags when you could get them at Stop’n’Rob around here. “Variations” would have sections with multiple stories about the same kink.

The spanking section would invariably be evenly divided between the “hurts so good” camp and the “humiliate me” camp.
I’m definitely in the “hurts so good” camp, and I really couldn’t pinpoint exactly why, but I do find it very erotic.